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'Twas the night before Galactic Starfighter - An Expac Poem


GalnarDegana

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'Twas the night before GS, when all through the stations

Arenas were popping, just not the ranked ones;

Our Cartel Coins were purchased, we were ready to buy,

The ship skins the next day, when one would catch our eye;

The PvEers were still kinda whinin’ on the forums;

Because 12v12 space dogfights "epitomized boredom;"

Dressed in my pilot’s gear I had earned from space loot,

I prepared for a new game that would make it all moot.

 

When onto the forums arose the patch notes,

I sprang to my laptop to see what the Devs wrote.

To my browser window I flew like a Flash,

Like my ‘Slinger’s Grenade when I button mash.

Not much different from the Public Test Server,

‘Cept now that they’re real, I have a little more fervor,

Still the space combat, 12v12, free-flight,

And the Vigilance changes that make you eat a Master Strike,

Marauders are nerfed and Shadows are buffed,

And DPS Operatives still just sit on their duffs.

Not much is new news, so not much of a thought,

Although, hey look, they misspelled Rail Shot.

Now, bug fix! now, relic buffs! now Rakghouls and Gree cubes!

New Arena map! Which of course will be used with these fast queues!

Training dummy attachments! Now, aren’t they cute?

Chase perception issues away, and parse executes.

One thing that did put a twinkle in my eye,

An actual Life Day event must be nigh;

For new achievements were added with the Rakghoul ones!

Now we won’t have to pay to have holiday fun —

Oh look, the old Cartel Packs are back with a new glint

For 6912 CC, a temp discount of 10 percent.

 

As I drew in a breath to absorb the new changes,

I looked at the forums to see all the rages.

All the trolls, out in force, instead of in ranked queues,

Arguing about class balance with boo-hoos;

And while their complaints were well justified,

When they argued with vitriol, their argument died.

Their eyes, all enflamed from the tiny balance pass!

Their cheeks, flushed with passion about their favorite class.

Never mind that this starts exactly what we all asked for,

Bioware making small adjustments unlike what they did before;

“This game’s gonna die, and it starts with my sub”

And they threaten to quit (‘course they won’t, join the club);

 

See, all of the PvPers are excited about space

That will take us in ships all over the place.

So even the problems we’ve had in the past,

Can’t diminish our joy at ship engines flying past.

From level one, you can fly in your fighter.

You can level without killing even one ground-based blighter;

Sure, the unlocks will make you feel cool,

I mean, blasters is all it takes to please this grinning fool,

The colors and skins are really just for show,

Buy them or not, doesn’t affect me, you know.

 

So Santa Bioware left us with events and an expac,

Might have killed ground PvP, but they’ll just say that,

“Sorry for no dual queue, my dear girls and boys—

Happy Life Day to all, go buy some Cartel Coins!”

Edited by GalnarDegana
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Twas the night before Starfighter,

And the patch notes arrived.

Yet what did I see,

When I peered with my eyes?

 

"Introducing Domination!"

Is how I'd summarize

The rescinding of their promise

for multiple game types.

 

The trailer did promise

of multiple modes

yet gameplay, at this time,

is just killing at nodes.

 

Oh Bio, oh EA, oh EAware we call it,

I'm sorry to say I'm somewhat despondent.

 

 

 

:confused:

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Twas the night before Starfighter,

And the patch notes arrived.

Yet what did I see,

When I peered with my eyes?

 

"Introducing Domination!"

Is how I'd summarize

The rescinding of their promise

for multiple game types.

 

The trailer did promise

of multiple modes

yet gameplay, at this time,

is just killing at nodes.

 

Oh Bio, oh EA, oh EAware we call it,

I'm sorry to say I'm somewhat despondent.

 

 

 

:confused:

 

amazing

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Twas the night before Starfighter,

And the patch notes arrived.

Yet what did I see,

When I peered with my eyes?

 

"Introducing Domination!"

Is how I'd summarize

The rescinding of their promise

for multiple game types.

 

The trailer did promise

of multiple modes

yet gameplay, at this time,

is just killing at nodes.

 

Oh Bio, oh EA, oh EAware we call it,

I'm sorry to say I'm somewhat despondent.

 

 

 

:confused:

 

Do you read the forums and website updates/dev posts? Or do you, like so many others, simply hop on bandwagons of blind rage? It is an EARLY RELEASE.They have stated MORE IS SOON TO COME.

 

It's like a day after that post with the hints at new huttball maps, there were people ranting about how they want more huttball and if there is no new huttball to come then they will /endsub. I can't actually decide if people who post like this are trolls or completely illiterate. I mean, you are writing on a forum, so I have to assume you can read... but, posts like these are so disconnected from the news we have readily available to us- it's so confusing. Why just float around the forums taking ***** in threads? Why not READ THE NEWS AVAILABLE TO YOU!?

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  • 2 months later...

 

Do you read the forums?

Do you check the website?

Did you check the Dev tracker,

before you posted tonight?

 

Or do you, like oh so many,

hop on bandwagons of rage?

It is an EARLY RELEASE.

It is an UNFINISHED STATE.

 

They clearly stated,

MORE IS TO COME

If you don't like it,

you can /endsub.

 

I can't actually decide,

if you simply can't read,

Or if you area a troll,

who makes posts like these.

 

You are so disconnected,

from the available news,

Why float in the forums?

READ WHAT'S AVAILABLE TO YOU!"

 

The precedent was created,

By the OP,

To code our responses,

in poetry.

 

So I fixed your post,

and today you'll hear me,

take back my words,

when this new mode is seen.

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