It is a very unreasonable comparison.
For one, you picked the options to get there, you may not have meant to pick those options, but you did. The game only has a linear path to follow.
So to the game it checks the lines "Did they say yes? Yup! Go here." "Did they continue to say yes? Yup! go here!"
You may have accidently been picking the "Yes" lines, but you were picking them, and so your character very much was saying "yes"
I'd say it's much more akin to saying yes to someone and waking up the next day and wondering why you let it get that far.
I'll try to clarify what I meant. It's not intended, clearly. I don't think BW wanted their game to create a situation where a companion npc r*pes the player character or pushes them into a romance that was unwanted. In the hidden flirts situation, it's coded incorrectly - leading to people accidentally starting the romance in cases where they didn't intend to.
The designers also made some poor decisions in terms of no opt-out options. There's really no excuse for a lack of opt-out options with a ftb. That should NEVER happen.