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DarthPasta's Avatar

02.14.2013 , 12:35 PM | #1
A vignette about my SW and his apprentice.

The sea churned and roiled, the whitecaps reaching upwards in a vain attempt to escape. Jaesa sat, looking out over the ocean, her hands tingling a bit from the cool breeze flowing in off the coast. She thought how alike the whitecaps reminded her of the snowy mountain peaks on Alderaan and how, at times, she missed her childhood home. Times like this, in fact, made her wish she had never left the Organa household. She shuddered a bit (due to the cold air, she told herself) and turned toward the man who was standing a few feet away. He looked out over the sea, his warm silver eyes staring as if he could see to the other side of the horizon.

"You didn't necessarily want to kill those men, did you?" Almost afraid of the answer, she waited for him to respond.

“What I did or did not want is not the issue. What needed to be done is what is important.”

Processing. The group of men had been dissidents, disturbers of the peace and sympathizers with the Republic, and he had been tasked with removing them. Even the Jedi who had stood with them had not been prepared for his “negotiating strategy.” She could still see the bodies on the floor of the bunker and she found herself wondering if things might have been able to transpire differently. Almost as if he read her mind, he said, “Always remember: an order without force is only a suggestion.”

She knew he gave them an opportunity to leave peacefully – he did that a lot, which was something she had been taught was NOT the way of a Sith – and when she looked up at him she saw a hint of…what? Regret? Jaesa was not afraid of him, but she was respectful of the power he wielded. She knew he would never turn it on her, Pierce, or the rest, but still, you didn’t intentionally stand close to the sun if you knew it would burn you. “I don’t know if I could have done that…especially the way you did it.” The last part was under her breath.

“What do you mean?”

She remembered the tempest of his blades as they carved up the air, the violet fire spinning from his lightsabers. “Well…there were times where you looked…out of control…”

“I am always in control. If you don’t fight against the wave, the wave has no reason to toss you.”

She thought about this, then nodded slightly.

The winds picked up a bit, and over the crash of the waves against the cliff she heard him say, “Are you afraid that you will end up becoming that way? ‘Out of control?’”

Jaesa had been thinking about this for a long time. Ever since she saw how easily it came to him: the simplicity of his movement, the sheer ferocity and power hidden beneath the carefree, languid motion of his body as he struck down his foes time and again. How do you control a storm? “I don’t want to feel like I don’t have control over what I do…” (she thought again about the separatists) …”or how I do it.”

He looked at her. “Don’t ever use that as an excuse. Saying that you are “out of control” is the same as denying who you really are.”

She remained silent. “Look, Jaesa,” he said, his tone taking on that commanding tone she’d come to recognize. “We are all servants to something. I was ordered to remove those men; therefore, I did as commanded. You are my apprentice; therefore, you follow me and learn from my example.”

She looked at him. “But how are you different than an akk dog? It obeys its master…aren’t you just doing the same thing? Obeying your master?”

He turned to meet her gaze, his silver eyes blazing with an intensity she had never seen before. “The will to act is the difference!” His presence bored into her soul; the conviction in his voice threatened to overwhelm her. After what seemed like an eternity, his eyes softened and the familiar warmth returned. He smiled faintly and put his hand on her shoulder for a moment. Leaning in closely, he spoke softly, almost inaudible over the thrashing sea. “There is a difference between submitting to the wave and allowing it to carry you where you want to go.” He held her gaze for another moment, still smiling faintly, then turned and walked away.

She thought about this. She knew he walked a dangerous path, but it was not until that moment that she truly realized what he was attempting to do and the depth of his strength. Jaesa looked back out over the roiling sea, then stood up and followed, letting the wave carry her.