The original Forced Companions Daycare spanned two years of gameplay, introducing our companions to major NPCs, operations bosses, and each other. This story continues the essential conceit: these are toddler versions of our beloved companions, thrown together into a daycare where, for some reason, nobody gets meaningfully punished and no one ever leaves no matter how severe their disagreements. It’s just one of those things.

 

Now that Knights of the Fallen Empire is out, their world has been turned upside down.

 

This entire thread assumes spoilers for the main quest and companion recruitments of Knights of the Fallen Empire. I will try to mark other specific spoilers as they come up.

 

I have been unable to play since finishing Chapter 9 once, but I’ll do my best…

 

A bright day outside, notwithstanding the strict geometric lines of distant ships. Several children toddle up to the door, where Khem Val is standing guard.

BABY DOC reaches up to open the door.

BABY DOC: Wha…? It’s locked.

KHEM VAL: Your powers of observation, while mediocre, at least got something right.

BABY ASHARA: How come we can’t go in?

KHEM VAL: It is forbidden.

BABY QYZEN FESS: If we score enough points can we go in?

KHEM VAL: You, maybe. But you have to work for it.

BABY DOC: What is going on here?

KHEM VAL, producing a pad of paper and several crayons: Here. Doc, Ashara, you may write one letter to all the other children you’re not going to see any time soon.

BABY GUSS, temporarily forgetting his terror of KHEM VAL: Why don’t I get to?

KHEM VAL: Because you’re not important.

BABY GUSS makes giant sad fish eyes. KHEM VAL is unmoved.

BABY DOC, listening: Hey! There are people inside, right now!

KHEM VAL: SCORPIO is handling it.

BABY GUSS: Oh. Maybe we’re better off out here.

BABY ASHARA, accusingly: Did you…replace us?

KHEM VAL: Me? I did nothing. You’ll notice I’m on the outside, too. Perhaps we can play a game while we wait for the daycare to open again.

BABY DOC: Play a Khem Val game.

BABY ASHARA: Only if it doesn’t involve eating Force sensitives.

BABY GUSS starts crying.

 

-

 

Inside FCD, T7-01 and SCORPIO supervise the children.

BABY THERON, running a wide circle: Watch out! Miss SCORPIO’s coming!

BABY LANA: Quick! To the controls!

BABY THERON and BABY LANA run to where BABY KOTH sits.

BABY LANA: Whew. She’s looking away again. Koth?

BABY KOTH, leaning intently over a plastic steering wheel repurposed from HK-55 parts: Working on it, working on it…leans forward dramatically and makes swooshing noises

BABY THERON: Hold on, Miss SCORPIO’s circling back. Evasive maneuvers!

BABY KOTH, a little uncertainly: Sssweeeeesscchhheeeeeswooosh?

BABY LANA: Lean left, Theron.

BABY THERON: Why?

BABY LANA: It helps with the maneuvers.

BABY KOTH: Truth.

BABY THERON, complying: If only we had something to defend ourselves with.

ASSISTANT SENYA, turning away from the desperate shadows of children out the window: No weaponry at Forced Companions Daycare.

BABY THERON: Oh, sure, your mean girl clique gets 1.2 lightsabers per person, but when we’re trying to save ourselves from a crazed AI…

BABY LANA: It hardly seems fair.

ASSISTANT SENYA: I will assist if she attempts to make you look any more ridiculous than you already do.

A moment’s silence.

BABY KOTH, weightily: Too little, too late.

 

-

 

Inside FCD, the children play more or less quietly.

T7-01: Daycare = quiet these days

SCORPIO: It gives me time to analyze several years’ worth of data.

T7-01: Maybe doors = open soon?

SCORPIO: Aren’t you the founder? You could slice them open at any time.

T7-01 thinks about this for a minute.

T7-01: Maybe open = later

SCORPIO: Excellent. I will have Khem Val report the behavior of the children who remain locked outside.

 

-

 

BABY KOTH is by the toybox. His spaceship control panel, crafted largely from HK-55 pieces, is in good shape, but his sights are now on the toy M1-4X.

BABY THERON: Aw, don’t take M1-4X apart.

M1-4X, from the toybox, where no one had thought to remove him: I agree with my illustrious compatriot! I cannot perform my function of defending daycare from Imperials if I have been dismantled for parts!

BABY KOTH looks meaningfully at BABY LANA.

M1-4X: I was getting around to that. Dastardly Sith.

BABY LANA: Language.

M1-4X: Accurate language. Sith.

BABY KOTH: Say the word and I’ll take his vocabulator, Lana.

BABY THERON: You can’t do that!

BABY KOTH: Just say the word.

BABY LANA: Let’s not. Theron will just sulk if we do.

BABY THERON: I don’t sulk. I force you to contemplate the consequences of your actions.

BABY LANA, mouthing behind her hand: He sulks.

M1-4X, mostly on general principle: For the Republic!

Edited November 11, 2015 by bright_ephemera

Oh this makes me very happy! I've missed FCD and look forward to more! I giggled a lot at the mean girl clique line.

I am looking forward to Koth macgyvering his way through FCD

A sunny day in FCDland. The doors of daycare remain stubbornly sealed shut. The children mill around aimlessly, waiting for the chance to go back inside.

KHEM VAL: Pierce. You have been chosen.

BABY PIERCE, intrigued: Yeah?

KHEM VAL: Come here.

BABY PIERCE: This isn’t one of those ‘lure off the apprentice and eat him” things, is it?

KHEM VAL: You will not know unless you come along.

BABY PIERCE: I’m in.

KHEM VAL and BABY PIERCE go around the corner.

KHEM VAL: You may be able to reenter daycare.

BABY PIERCE: Is Quinn still stuck outside?

KHEM VAL: Yes.

BABY PIERCE: Awesome. Oh! But maybe I’m too cool to come back.

KHEM VAL: That is doubtful.

BABY PIERCE: Tell you what. If somebody somewhere punches ten Pubbies – no! Twenty Pubbies, then I’ll come back inside.

KHEM VAL, slowly: Punch twenty Pubbies.

BABY PIERCE: Yep.

KHEM VAL: I will submit it for consideration.

 

-

 

BABY KOTH: Lana?

BABY LANA: Yes?

BABY KOTH: You think we’re settled in enough that we can bring HK-55 back?

BABY LANA: Bring him back? Koth, he’s in pieces. You used most of them for your starship command console.

BABY KOTH: Yeah, but I saved his central processing unit and his vocabulator.

BABY LANA trots to the toybox and pulls out a small colorful box labeled HK-51.

BABY LANA: Will this help?

BABY KOTH: Maybe. I’ll hook this up, you start up HK-51.

HK-51: Greetings, master! Are you prepared to educate organics?

BABY KOTH finishes pinching together a circuit in the dented little box that is now Velcro tied into a battered droid forearm.

BABY KOTH: Here we go. HK-55, meet HK-51. HK-51, HK-55.

BABY LANA: Whew. Say that ten times fast.

HK-51: Query: Wait, your central processing unit was in your forearm?

HK-55: Explanation: Nobody expects it there.

HK-51: Disdainful reminder: We live in a galaxy with lightsabers. People get their hands cut off all the time.

HK-55: Taunt: I think you’re just jealous that you’re a Speak ‘n’ Spell and I was a deadly assassin droid.

HK-51: Protest: I’m a deadly assass-

HK-51 makes a small strangled noise.

HK-51: I mean, yes. I am a Speak ‘n’ Spell. How ordinary and humdrum my life is.

HK-55: Gloating: Yeah. I just bet you’re jealous.

HK-55’s hand twitches.

HK-55: Inquiry: Where is the rest of me?

BABY LANA: Serving a good cause. Yes. It was necessary.

BABY KOTH: For high-speed spaceship chases.

BABY LANA: And…reasons.

HK-55: Resignation: Very well, masters.

 

-

 

A sunny day in FCDland. The doors of daycare remain stubbornly sealed shut. The children mill around aimlessly, waiting for the chance to go back inside.

BABY YUUN: Yuun has found a path back into daycare.

KHEM VAL: No, you haven’t.

BABY YUUN: It’s right over–

KHEM VAL picks up BABY YUUN by the scruff of his insectoid neck and raises him to eye – and tooth – level.

KHEM VAL: No. You haven’t.

BABY YUUN: Yuun cannot lie.

KHEM VAL: Fine. Go in. I’m kicking the tunnel shut after you.

BABY YUUN: The trail goes deep. What if Yuun finds Baby Soa in there?

KHEM VAL: You just get to figure that out. Shoo.

Only great things come of having two HKs in a room together.

That's awesome! Love it

 

I had to chuckle about Baby Pierce asking people to punch 10, no 20 pubbies for him lol.

Yaaay its back. Something to make me smile in the morning

Thank you all! It's fun to be back

 

BABY THERON: Lana! Lana! Look what I got!

BABY LANA: What?

BABY THERON, pointing: I got a nametag. It says Theron Shan, Super Secret Spy.

BABY LANA: Doesn’t that slightly defeat the purpose of being secret?

BABY THERON: I don’t see the problem.

ASSISTANT SENYA: This is something that has been confusing me, Theron.

BABY THERON: What has?

ASSISTANT SENYA: Your mother is the galaxy’s – I mean your half’s – the galaxy’s most famous, er, Jedi.

BABY THERON: Yeah.

ASSISTANT SENYA: And your father is the galaxy’s – I mean your half’s – the galaxy’s most famous…Republic?...soldier.

BABY THERON: Yeah.

ASSISTANT SENYA: And you took your mother’s name to boot.

BABY THERON: Yeah.

ASSISTANT SENYA: And you have not renounced in any way any aspect of your lineage or your origin.

BABY THERON: Nope.

ASSISTANT SENYA: So how are you qualified to be a secret agent?

BABY THERON, pointing: Says so right here.

BABY LANA: I don’t think we’re getting through to him.

BABY THERON: Mister Teeseven!

T7-01 rolls up.

T7-01: Theron = problem?

BABY THERON: No. No, just tell ‘em that if we ever had to do super secret spy stuff you would back me up. As a super secret spy.

T7-01: Theron + T7-01 = super secret spy team any time the Republic needs us

ASSISTANT SENYA: Using the name you’ve publicly used for at least two hundred years?

T7-01: Senya = help with making juice snacks for the children // Theron = perfectly good spy

T7-01 and ASSISTANT SENYA leave.

BABY LANA: I still think you’re doing it wrong.

BABY THERON: Well, excuse me, Miss “I have a great idea the Republic should help me with even though I’m a card-carrying Sith.”

BABY LANA looks suddenly guilty as she covers her pocket with one hand.

BABY LANA: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

 

-

 

The exiled children of FCD mill around outside the locked daycare. KHEM VAL approaches BABY TANNO VIK where he is doing pushups and probably contemplating mayhem.

KHEM VAL: Tanno Vik. I have news.

BABY TANNO VIK, standing: Yeah? What is it?

KHEM VAL: You have to leave.

BABY TANNO VIK: I did leave. That’s why I’m out here with everyone else.

KHEM VAL: I mean leave Forced Companions, permanently.

The assembled children gasp.

BABY TANNO VIK: Can you even do that?

KHEM VAL: I can now.

BABY TANNO VIK: But what about the Take the Credits and Run Club?

KHEM VAL: You are no longer a member.

BABY TANNO VIK: Juvenile Delinquents Class of 18 ATC Or Thereabouts?

KHEM VAL: Expunged from the books.

BABY TANNO VIK: But who’s gonna run interference for Andronikos on the next foam dart blaster shipment?

KHEM VAL glares.

BABY TANNO VIK: Which was a purely theoretical exercise, I assure you.

KHEM VAL glares.

BABY TANNO VIK: And what about my detonite stash?

BABY ELARA, piping up from the sidelines: Pierce will just make Yuun find it. It will still go to illegal use.

BABY TANNO VIK, wailing: But not my illegal use!

KHEM VAL points.

BABY TANNO VIK picks up his reinforced phobium lunchbox and makes a rude gesture at the other children.

BABY TANNO VIK: I’m not gone forever. You’ll see.

The children watch in stunned silence as BABY TANNO VIK trudges down the road.

BABY VETTE: Is he really…gone?

BABY ELARA: I didn’t think the rules allowed that.

KHEM VAL: I don’t see anyone stopping me.

BABY ELARA: You know he’s just going to dismantle the anti-air turrets and construct some sort of death machine so he can come exact revenge.

The silence turns thoughtful. Then slightly panicked.

KHEM VAL: Vik! You may return!

Edited November 11, 2015 by bright_ephemera

A cloudy day outside FCD. The door remains locked.

BABY KIRA: Mr. Khem Val?

KHEM VAL: Yes?

BABY KIRA: If Mister Teeseven and Miss SCORPIO are in there, and you’re out here, where’s Mister Lord Scourge?

KHEM VAL: You don’t have to say “Mister.” Just “Lord Scourge” is enough.

BABY KIRA: Yeah, but where is he?

BABY CORSO: You actually want to know?

BABY KIRA: Hey, do you want to be surprised when he shows up?

BABY CORSO: Well…no.

KHEM VAL: Lord Scourge will appear when he wishes to. (grumbling) He failed to call in sick this morning.

BABY KIRA: Force users don’t get sick. Everybody knows that.

KHEM VAL: Maybe. But they have other weaknesses.

KHEM VAL cheerfully shows his ghastly mess of teeth.

BABY KIRA: Right, moving right along.

BABY KIRA doesn’t quite run away.

 

-

 

ASSISTANT SENYA, while cleaning in YOUNG BOWDAAR’s stead, comes across the terrarium in the corner. Inside, KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING sleeps a fitful sleep.

ASSISTANT SENYA: What is this?

T7-01: Karagga = Hutt // Karagga = class pet

ASSISTANT SENYA: None of the children have been tending him.

T7-01: New children =/= introduced // Karagga = probably hungry

KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING shakes himself awake.

KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: Ah! A newcomer! I am Karagga the Unyielding, Grand Mogul of the Hutt Cartel, Supreme Power of...wasn’t little Risha going to build me a new herald droid?

T7-01: Risha = left with the other children

KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: You’ll pay for this insult!

ASSISTANT SENYA, intrigued: How, exactly?

KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING, sulkily: It is impossible to get reliable help these days.

 

-

 

A cloudy day outside FCD. The children eye the sky with concern and wander about, still exiled from FCD proper.

BABY TORIAN toddles up to the door and knocks. Then knocks again. Then wiggles the handle.

BABY TORIAN: Is this a test of our skills?

KHEM VAL: It’s a locked door, mostly.

BABY TORIAN: But it could be a test. Burc’ya!

BABY AKAAVI, having improvised a staff out of a crooked fallen branch nearby, approaches.

BABY TORIAN: Copaniir parjai cuun dar’yaim?

BABY AKAAVI: Tion’ad parjairu in?

BABY TORIAN: Naasade.

BABY JORGAN: Stop making up words.

BABY AKAAVI: Oya?

BABY TORIAN: Oya!

The Mandalorians commence a vicious assault on the door, paying particular attention to its handle. BABY AKAAVI’s prowess with the staff is matched only by BABY TORIAN’s skill with adorable fists and tiny cute feet.

BABY TORIAN: Haar’chak.

BABY AKAAVI: If Mister Teeseven were here he would tell you not to swear.

BABY TORIAN: If Mister Teeseven were here we wouldn’t have these problems.

BABY JORGAN: See? Two complete sentences without made-up stuff. Was that so hard?

BABY TORIAN: Aruetii.

BABY AKAAVI: Naasad suvarir.

BABY JORGAN: Nobody understands what the hell you’re saying. I bet you’re just going to keep it up forever.

BABY TORIAN: Naasad oritsir // Jorgan serimir bantov

 

 

MANDO’A, loosely translated:

 

 

Edited November 9, 2015 by bright_ephemera

Oh my god, that portion with baby Torian (finally!) and Akaavi was so cute I almost fell out of my chair squeeing.

 

May I make a suggestion? Since Kaliyo is slated to return next chapter, which isn't for a couple of months, how 'bout one where Khem tells her she can go in eventually, but not yet, leading to her getting aggressive ("why can't I go in NOW? who are YOU to tell me when I can and can't go in?").

Ah, I love it! This is for Abvora. (Trying a new authorial color here.)

 

BABY KALIYO: Hey! Bugboy!

BABY VECTOR looks around.

BABY VECTOR: Are you referring to us?

BABY KALIYO: You know there’s only one of you, right?

BABY VECTOR: We have been confused with Yuun in the past.

BABY KALIYO: No, I definitely wanted to harass you.

BABY VECTOR, patiently: What about?

BABY KALIYO: I forget. Hey, Mister Khem, I want to go inside now.

KHEM VAL: You will, someday. But not today.

BABY KALIYO: Will too.

KHEM VAL: You don't want to just yet. There's a bugboy inside, too.

BABY KALIYO: Right! Yuwhatshisface. Bugboys, bugboys everywhere...

BABY KALIYO stares philosophically into her pink water bottle.

BABY KALIYO: And not a drop to drink. Oh, well. I'm going inside now.

BABY KALIYO starts strutting toward the door, which is about five times her size.

KHEM VAL: No, you're not.

BABY KALIYO: Am too.

BABY KALIYO stretches up on her toes and flicks at the door handle. It doesn't move.

BABY KALIYO: Come on, now.

BABY KALIYO tries again and is again frustrated. She grips the edge of the door and pulls with all her might.

BABY KALIYO: Any minute now...

BABY KALIYO loses her grip and goes reeling back.

BABY KALIYO: Oh, that's it.

BABY KALIYO, red-faced, commences an all-out attack that makes the Mandalorian breach effort look tame.

BABY KALIYO: Yeah? You want a piece of this? You want a piece of this?

KHEM VAL: It doesn't want anything. It's a door.

BABY KALIYO: Shut up.

KHEM VAL, ominously: Your actions have consequences nowadays.

BABY KALIYO, still flailing. Yeah. Shut up.

KHEM VAL: Your disrespect for the staff also has consequences.

BABY KALIYO: Like letting me through this door? You'd get rid of me that way.

KHEM VAL hesitates for a very, very long time. KALIYO continues her abuse of the locked door.

KHEM VAL: No. Enough.

KHEM VAL picks Kaliyo up by her battered pink onesie and holds her at eye level.

KHEM VAL: If you do not behave I will be forced to devour you.

BABY KALIYO: Yeah, right. BABY KALIYO takes a swing at KHEM VAL, mostly from habit You only eat Force-sensitives. smugly And I am not a Force sensitive.

KHEM VAL, drawing her closer and letting his teeth bristle while he sniffs: Are you sure?

BABY KALIYO: OH LOOK AT THAT INTERESTING THING OVER THERE I'M GOING TO DO RIGHT NOW HA HA SEE YOU LATER MR. KHEM

KHEM VAL drops BABY KALIYO. BABY KALIYO books it.

 

- Meanwhile… -

 

BABY THERON: Uh, who's trying to get in?

SCORPIO: My prediction estimates a twenty-three percent chance that it is Skadge getting bored. Twenty-one percent chance, Kaliyo. Seventeen percent chance, Akaavi, again. Fourteen percent chance Qyzen Fess, assuming he has exhausted his points outside for the week. Nine percent chance Lord Scourge, assuming he missed the memo about daycare being closed, and five percent chance Tanno Vik now that he has realized he left his detonite stash indoors.

BABY PIERCE perks up.

SCORPIO: The detonite stash has since been confiscated.

BABY PIERCE droops.

SCORPIO: Regardless, they will not enter. That door was specifically designed to be impregnable against all known forces and several theoretically predicted ones.

T7-01: T7 = takes building codes seriously

SCORPIO: Yes, we all remember the Soa incident.

KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING, from the terrarium: The one that made you guard against my ingeniously laid traps!

SCORPIO: I’m sure you thought booby-trapping the floor was clever.

BABY THERON: So…is probably-Skadge gonna let up anytime soon?

SCORPIO: He is not that fast a learner.

Edited November 11, 2015 by bright_ephemera

Finally something good abut this expansion... the return of FCD! And not just one post but a plethora of them.

@Irongut, I had to start rationing posts by word count because too many short ideas were sparking. This may calm down to one or two sketches per post...maybe (I love your lightsaber signature!)

 

Really, guys, I'm delighted to be remembered and I hope you're enjoying the new companions. As new content rolls out, I suspect our old friends will find new ways to interact, both with us and with FCD.

 

BABY XALEK is sitting off to one side, contemplating a flower. BABIES ASHARA, KIRA, and JAESA approach. BABY XALEK, noticing them, snarls and sparks the flower in a burst of Force lightning.

BABY ASHARA: Hey, Xalek. Nice flower.

BABY KIRA: Oh, leave him alone. He’s obviously busy.

BABY JAESA: Did you just kill that poor flower?

BABY XALEK, defensively: It was weak.

BABY JAESA: Oh. I suppose that makes sense.

BABY ASHARA: How’s your “bone” mask doing? in a stage whisper It’s cruelty-free ceramic.

BABY XALEK: It’s real bones! From real people! I slew them myself!

BABY ASHARA: You what?

BABY KIRA: Killed them. Not.

BABY JAESA: Cruelty-free ceramic is…nice? I think it’s nice?

BABY XALEK: It’s terrifying! You should all be terrified!

BABY XALEK cups his hand and summons forth a terrifying spark of lightning at least the size of a fingernail. He winds up and throws it at BABY ASHARA, who squeaks in indignation as it stings her montrals.

KHEM VAL comes over in long strides.

KHEM VAL: Xalek. No crushing the other children.

BABY JAESA: Whew! I knew there was something wrong.

BABY KIRA: Out of curiosity, are you ever going to pick a value system?

BABY ASHARA, with big tearful eyes: He was bullying me!

KHEM VAL: I know just the thing for him.

BABY XALEK: And my bone mask. My scary bone mask.

KHEM VAL: Yes, that. Come.

KHEM VAL and BABY XALEK walk around to the back door.

KHEM VAL: You may go inside.

BABY XALEK’s yellow eyes go round behind his mask.

KHEM VAL: Things have changed there.

BABY XALEK: It’ll be like I crushed all the other children, right? Because they’re not there anymore.

KHEM VAL: There will be new children you have to not crush.

BABY XALEK: That doesn’t sound fun at all.

Right on cue SCORPIO opens the door and holds out a metallic hand. BABY XALEK walks in past her. The door closes.

The door opens again.

SCORPIO: Where is he?

KHEM VAL: Xalek? He just walked in.

SCORPIO: He isn’t in here.

KHEM VAL: He isn’t out here.

SCORPIO: Interesting. I will report your negligence to Teeseven.

KHEM VAL: Now I have no idea what to tell the children.

SCORPIO: Tell them he went looking for a better mask. A real one. Perhaps that will induce guilt in your more impressionable charges.

KHEM VAL: Jaesa doesn’t really count.

 

 

BABY LANA finishes scribbling something on a gold star sticker.

BABY LANA: Hey, Theron. See what I got.

BABY THERON: What’s that?

BABY LANA: It says Person Who Tells Super Secret Spies What To Do.

BABY THERON, dubiously: Really?

BABY KOTH: Looks clear enough to me.

BABY THERON: I thought we were in this together!

BABY LANA, eyeing something lofty: While true in a strict sense, I maintain that I am the best qualified boss here. I am Sith.

SCORPIO: Even the defiant struggles of the Sith pale against the inevitable decay of human civilization.

An awkward silence. BABY YUUN, being the only alien in the room, looks intrigued, but says nothing.

BABY LANA: So as I was saying…

Edited November 11, 2015 by bright_ephemera

SCORPIO: Where is he?

KHEM VAL: Xalek? He just walked in.

SCORPIO: He isn’t in here.

KHEM VAL: He isn’t out here.

Well, that's awkward.

SCORPIO: Even the defiant struggles of the Sith pale against the inevitable decay of human civilization.

An awkward silence. BABY YUUN, being the only alien in the room, looks intrigued, but says nothing.

BABY LANA: So as I was saying…

I'm pretty sure even SCORPIO can't traumatize these kids, try though she may.

I'm pretty sure even SCORPIO can't traumatize these kids, try though she may.

 

(I forgot Plum was your color. I see enough of you that I think I'll move out of the way. )

 

Yeah, SCORPIO being ominous is par for the course at this point.

 

Now! I just realized that my two Bounty Hunter introductions were never posted on these forums. Therefore, for the duration of two stories, I invite you to go BACK IN TIME to simpler days, when men were small children, women were small children, and all the children were above average. FCD teemed with dozens of inhabitants, and the concept of a companion leaving didn't even exist...(flashback harp music)

 

 

 

 

 

 

I must've missed these when you first posted them!

 

Oh yes, I can definitely see Vik and Gault running cons at FCD. Awwww, Baby Torian and Baby Akaavi.....so cute. I love the other kids keep telling them not to use made up languages.

 

BABY ASHARA: Mister Teeseven, make them stop making up words.

BABY AKAAVI: It is Mando’a.

BABY KIRA: Everyone knows that the only languages anybody speaks around here are Basic and probably-not-Talz.

BABY BROONMARK: Blllorp.

BABY GUSS: And beepy-whistly, if you’re Mister Teeseven.

BABY KIRA: Okay, and beepy-whistly, if you’re Mister Teeseven.

This made me giggle.....

 

and this

LORD SCOURGE has returned from his daily rounds of glaring the snow into submission on the campus walkways.

made me snort my diet coke all over my keyboard!

I missed reading these. Good to see they've finally returned

 

I don't suppose we'll be seeing Baby Arcann, Vaylin, or even Thexan anytime soon?

I missed reading these. Good to see they've finally returned

 

I don't suppose we'll be seeing Baby Arcann, Vaylin, or even Thexan anytime soon?

 

Thexxan could be in 'Caspar' mode lol. That would be adorable.

Thexxan could be in 'Caspar' mode lol. That would be adorable.

 

Ghost Thexan needs to be a thing now

 

Also, fancy seeing you here Luna.

Ghost Thexan needs to be a thing now

 

Also, fancy seeing you here Luna.

 

Hiya Guess I get around more than I thought lol. Someone with skills needs to draw a picture of ghosty caspar Thexan lol.

Hiya Guess I get around more than I thought lol. Someone with skills needs to draw a picture of ghosty caspar Thexan lol.

 

Guess so, though I don't think I would've recognized you if it wasn't for the Marr thread you made... Or maybe I would have due to your fancy signature

 

Don't look at me, I have horrid skills in that regard

Forced Companions Daycare has returned! With Fallen Empire companions! WOOOOO!!!!!

 

I'll continue reading soon. Thank you! We just need some art of the baby new guys and gals. Will baby Theron have implants? How old is Senya? Will baby Lana be ugly or pretty?

@alaurin: I always envision Lord Scourge stepping outside and glaring at the snow until it finds somewhere else to be. Cheaper than shoveling!

 

@Ardim and now @Lunafox: Oh-ho, a challenge! It may not be immediate, but I dare say we’ll see more of the royal family…ghost Thexan included.

 

@Anysao, important questions! I had clean forgot about Theron's implants, but by the time he meets Mako they must do something. Assistant Senya is vaguely old enough to be a mother - more on that when she meets the terrible twins. And Lana, of course, has the most mussed blonde hair, even if her eyelashes tend to clip.

 

I have great news, it’s going to take a week (!!) but I have something for everyone who isn’t mysteriously missing (and those will at least be mentioned and acknowledged)! Except the ship droids, screw you, ship droids.

 

 

T7-01 whistles loudly, commanding the attention of everyone inside FCD.

T7-01: Today = a new child and a visitor

The door opens. A masked toddler in high spiked shoulderpads stalks in.

BABY DARTH MARR: This is not how I expected to enter here.

T7-01: Children = welcome Darth Marr

BABY LANA: Wait, a Darth? You can’t be more than four years old!

BABY DARTH MARR: I’m very preeco…er, preci…uh, advanced for my age.

The door opens once more. A tall grey-bearded man in heavy robes enters.

T7-01: Visitor = Emperor Valkorion // T7 = doing this under protest

EMPEROR VALKORION: Noted.

EMPEROR VALKORION makes brief and embarrassing eye contact with ASSISTANT SENYA. ASSISTANT SENYA remembers something she has to do in the other room.

The children, including BABY DARTH MARR, instinctively quiet and watch EMPEROR VALKORION closely.

T7-01: Emperor Valkorion = terrible person // Emperor Valkorion = wants to destroy all life in the galaxy for his own benefit

EMPEROR VALKORION: Yes, but universal health care.

BABY KOTH: Sign me up!

EMPEROR VALKORION: This and other progressive social policies can be yours, if you will only kneel.

BABY DARTH MARR: I won’t.

EMPEROR VALKORION: But you have to-

BABY DARTH MARR: No, I don’t.

EMPEROR VALKORION: I command-

BABY DARTH MARR: You already got one Empire in trouble. Why would I trust you with another one?

EMPEROR VALKORION’s mouth works uselessly for a few seconds while the four-year-old BABY DARTH MARR’s mask stares him down. Finally EMPEROR VALKORION glares with the fury of a hundred toy lasers. He reaches out one hand. An arc of Force lightning that would make BABY XALEK weep with jealousy if he weren't currently bugged and unable to enter the room strikes at BABY DARTH MARR, and BABY DARTH MARR falls.

BABY PIERCE: Wow. Is that what being dead looks like? Assuming you're not a stuffed animal soldier squad, everybody knows what that looks like.

T7-01: This galaxy = sometimes meaningful consequences for bad companion behavior // sometimes staggeringly harsh consequences for bad companion behavior

M1-4X, from the toybox: Was it a harsh consequence for an Imperial?

BABY PIERCE: Sith.

M1-4X: Even better! Huzzah!

BABY LANA: Now he's dead.

BABY YUUN: Yuun liked the old FCD better.

The children watch in horrified silence as EMPEROR VALKORION picks BABY DARTH MARR’s limp form up by the scruff of his armored neck and walks out.

The silence lasts a moment longer.

BABY KOTH: I thought he had some really good policy points.

Oh, wow, that was...dark. Still funny, but dark.

 

 

(On the plus side, the only thing better than Marr ripping Valk a new one is baby Marr ripping Valk a new one)

I was so hoping Marr could live on in FCD, if nothing else.

 

...instance reset?