My youngest is leaving today, for faraway places and unknown dangers, partly of his job and partly of the world today. With this loss, I have also lost my drive, my energy and my heart. My muse sits, unnoticed, on the desk, patiently waiting for me to queue up a word doc and start typing.

 

I am not sure where to go now, and my stories wait, their incessant voices silent now. I know that in a few days they'll find their way to the forefront, but for now, I feel stilled. Time has become fluid, marked by the before and after, and is neither enemy nor friend.

 

I say this to say, my son has deployed into a combat zone, and at least until I can get my feet under me, I don't know if I can write.

/hugs

Writing can wait. Good luck to you and your family. If your son's anything like what I know of you, he'll be sensible, although that really doesn't stop a mother's worries. I hope everything goes smoothly.

My youngest is leaving today, for faraway places and unknown dangers, partly of his job and partly of the world today. With this loss, I have also lost my drive, my energy and my heart. My muse sits, unnoticed, on the desk, patiently waiting for me to queue up a word doc and start typing.

 

I am not sure where to go now, and my stories wait, their incessant voices silent now. I know that in a few days they'll find their way to the forefront, but for now, I feel stilled. Time has become fluid, marked by the before and after, and is neither enemy nor friend.

 

I say this to say, my son has deployed into a combat zone, and at least until I can get my feet under me, I don't know if I can write.

Oh, honey. *hug* When my big brother deployed to a hot zone I spent weeks burying my nose in my work to avoid thinking too hard. And I didn't even give birth to the guy. I can't imagine how much harder this must be for you.

Take your time. Even over there they have their own everyday-life rhythms while they go about their everyday-life things. One day at a time.

I'm not sure what I can say. It would certainly be disrespectful of me to try and give advice, or say I know what you're feeling, since I've never had children. All I can say is that I am here to support you, as I am sure the rest of our family are as well. And don't worry about the writing, write when and what you feel comfortable with.

Same here mags.

All I want is a synopsis, brain. Some catchy thing that says what it's all about? "I sort of scribbled down every scattered thought I had about this woman for eight months" isn't a good synopsis. Can you at least pretend there was a theme? A direction? Can you ID something? No?

Right now the summary I have on the secondary title page is "[insert series summary/vision/something here. If I have one? Hmph. Think of something. The adventures of Sith Warrior Ruth across an eighteen-year period starting on Dromund Kaas.]" and that's pretty lame. You wrote it, idiot! You should know what it's about!

I hate writing.

My youngest is leaving today, for faraway places and unknown dangers, partly of his job and partly of the world today. With this loss, I have also lost my drive, my energy and my heart. My muse sits, unnoticed, on the desk, patiently waiting for me to queue up a word doc and start typing.

 

I am not sure where to go now, and my stories wait, their incessant voices silent now. I know that in a few days they'll find their way to the forefront, but for now, I feel stilled. Time has become fluid, marked by the before and after, and is neither enemy nor friend.

 

I say this to say, my son has deployed into a combat zone, and at least until I can get my feet under me, I don't know if I can write.

*big big hugs* Like I said before, he'll be in my thoughts, and I pray he comes home safe to you. xoxo

My youngest is leaving today, for faraway places and unknown dangers, partly of his job and partly of the world today. With this loss, I have also lost my drive, my energy and my heart. My muse sits, unnoticed, on the desk, patiently waiting for me to queue up a word doc and start typing.

 

I am not sure where to go now, and my stories wait, their incessant voices silent now. I know that in a few days they'll find their way to the forefront, but for now, I feel stilled. Time has become fluid, marked by the before and after, and is neither enemy nor friend.

 

I say this to say, my son has deployed into a combat zone, and at least until I can get my feet under me, I don't know if I can write.

Lots of my family are veterans...I can't say I really understand that well but to some degree I do. I really feel for you, and I hope your son stays safe. My prayers will be with him till he comes home.

My youngest is leaving today, for faraway places and unknown dangers, partly of his job and partly of the world today. With this loss, I have also lost my drive, my energy and my heart. My muse sits, unnoticed, on the desk, patiently waiting for me to queue up a word doc and start typing.

 

I am not sure where to go now, and my stories wait, their incessant voices silent now. I know that in a few days they'll find their way to the forefront, but for now, I feel stilled. Time has become fluid, marked by the before and after, and is neither enemy nor friend.

 

I say this to say, my son has deployed into a combat zone, and at least until I can get my feet under me, I don't know if I can write.

Aww Magdalane *hugs* thoughts are with you and your son.

Argh. I have a beginning and an end. A really awesome end. And a weak-a** middle that is driving me nuts!! I hate writing

I have this problem, also I wrote the end to my AU fic so long ago it's starting to look stupid now.

./sympathize

Argh. I have a beginning and an end. A really awesome end. And a weak-a** middle that is driving me nuts!! I hate writing

That's how NSP started. I had starting point and what I wanted to do with it, but lol unformed middle. [sigh]

This isn't about the artistic/creative part, but ARGH. I spent three hours last night pulling together/merging scattered story elements into one master file that had neatly organized "published" and "unpublished" sections along with extensive but organized notes. I deleted the old scrap files - deleted them off a mobile drive, so there isn't a recycle bin saving them.

Turns out I deleted the shiny new master file, too. The one I saved turns out to have been one of the hellish intermediate jumbles. I discarded about an hour and a half of careful sorting, copying, labeling, and editing.

I could scream.

It would be useful/desirable to repeat this process - sans moronic deletion errors - for my other seven major continuities/timelines, but I'm really not feeling it right now.

/slumps into her chair

I admit it. I suck at plots. Why can't all writing be witty banter and character interaction? It's so much easier!!

Why does it suck D: Why does it always suck?

Dear Muse,

Thanks for taking up residence in my head again after going on vacation for the better part of the past seven months, even if you didn't bring me back any of the cute little umbrellas from your drinks. Yeah, don't try to deny it, just admit that you were drowning yourself in umbrella drinks, ogling pool boys and scrunching nice clean scrunchy sand between your toes while my brain was turning to mush from lack of inspiration.

Now that you're back, can we try to keep sane hours? 'Sane' being relative, of course. Nine pm is 'sane'. Three-thirty am is not. And about your still, after all these years, refusing to help me out with any sort of linear plot for anything I write- it's cruel. You're up to your same old trick of taking control of my fingers and typing out whatever you damned well please, leaving me to clutch my head in despair during every next-day reread. Linear plot, please, or I call in an exorcist.

Er. I might have been too harsh there with the exorcist thing...please don't take my complaints too seriously and do another runner, muse. For the most part I'm glad that you're back. I'm pretty miserable when you're absent. I'd just like us to coexist and coordinate at a higher level than we have in the past. Can we do that? Even though I don't share your enthusiasm for drinks the color of fabric softener?

Sincerely,

Me

(p.s.- that fanfic penned earlier this year and still extant on a certain site, unedited despite my seismic shift in head canon? stop pestering me for a rewrite; I'm not lying when I say I've forgotten my password)

(p.p.s.- bet every single one of those pool boys looked like Quinn, didn't they? hussy)

Dear Current Story

From a distance, writing a piece that studies the Jedi and the way they approach the force and the way they work, is really cool. However, up close, you are a painful SOB to write about. I continually find that the point I am trying to get across is quite quickly shot down or torn apart by counter points.

And I'm the one coming up with them.

So if you would stop kindly punching holes in my philosophical concepts, perhaps I could actually get through chapter 1 and to the other chapters that also need a few revisions and work.

Sincerely

-Disgruntled Jedi philosopher

P.S. Of course, now I have another brainstorm. Time to go back and see if this will make it more clear.

Dear Current Story

 

From a distance, writing a piece that studies the Jedi and the way they approach the force and the way they work, is really cool. However, up close, you are a painful SOB to write about. I continually find that the point I am trying to get across is quite quickly shot down or torn apart by counter points.

 

And I'm the one coming up with them.

 

So if you would stop kindly punching holes in my philosophical concepts, perhaps I could actually get through chapter 1 and to the other chapters that also need a few revisions and work.

 

Sincerely

-Disgruntled Jedi philosopher

 

P.S. Of course, now I have another brainstorm. Time to go back and see if this will make it more clear.

Ahaha, I know the feeling, trying to deal with Jedi (and, for me, Sith) philosophy!

Dear brain,

It's really cute that you finally decided to focus on one storyline to the exclusion of all others for two weeks straight. Could it be one of the ones that people want to read? No? Gah!

Dear characters,

Please stop developing minds of your own. We have a map, you know where we're going. Stop trying to take scenic routes, pausing for picnics, and seeking out new worlds and new civilisations.

Sincerely,

Your author

Stop trying to take scenic routes, pausing for picnics, and seeking out new worlds and new civilisations.

But I saw a rabbit!

With all of the confusion of the past month, I was hoping to be able to return to writing. Thought I'd turned a corner, had a handle on things, but nooooooooooo. What did I do? I had to go and fall in love on top of everything. Now, I'm having trouble writing a grocery list. I admitted my long time feelings, and now my muse has gone off with his, I can only presume. Hope they send a postcard, since I can still read-- at least, I can today.

Why is it that I can only write if I'm hurt or unhappy or just plain stuck in my life??? Please understand I'm so happy I think my heart will burst right out of my body, but my brain refuses to continue a story line, or even think about plot twists.

My head hurts. I'm going to lie down.

With all of the confusion of the past month, I was hoping to be able to return to writing. Thought I'd turned a corner, had a handle on things, but nooooooooooo. What did I do? I had to go and fall in love on top of everything. Now, I'm having trouble writing a grocery list. I admitted my long time feelings, and now my muse has gone off with his, I can only presume. Hope they send a postcard, since I can still read-- at least, I can today.

 

Why is it that I can only write if I'm hurt or unhappy or just plain stuck in my life??? Please understand I'm so happy I think my heart will burst right out of my body, but my brain refuses to continue a story line, or even think about plot twists.

 

My head hurts. I'm going to lie down.

Congrats

With all of the confusion of the past month, I was hoping to be able to return to writing. Thought I'd turned a corner, had a handle on things, but nooooooooooo. What did I do? I had to go and fall in love on top of everything. Now, I'm having trouble writing a grocery list. I admitted my long time feelings, and now my muse has gone off with his, I can only presume. Hope they send a postcard, since I can still read-- at least, I can today.

 

Why is it that I can only write if I'm hurt or unhappy or just plain stuck in my life??? Please understand I'm so happy I think my heart will burst right out of my body, but my brain refuses to continue a story line, or even think about plot twists.

 

My head hurts. I'm going to lie down.

Writing can be a way of working stuff out that you otherwise can't do - sounds like you're got everything pretty much sorted now ^.~

With all of the confusion of the past month, I was hoping to be able to return to writing. Thought I'd turned a corner, had a handle on things, but nooooooooooo. What did I do? I had to go and fall in love on top of everything. Now, I'm having trouble writing a grocery list. I admitted my long time feelings, and now my muse has gone off with his, I can only presume. Hope they send a postcard, since I can still read-- at least, I can today.

 

Why is it that I can only write if I'm hurt or unhappy or just plain stuck in my life??? Please understand I'm so happy I think my heart will burst right out of my body, but my brain refuses to continue a story line, or even think about plot twists.

 

My head hurts. I'm going to lie down.

I've never been so happy to read about writer's block. Congrats, love can make for a lot of other writing, it just might not be Star Wars related. <3

Dear characters,

Thank you for inspiring me to write all the things I've posted here thus far, and all the unfinished pieces I have yet to post, and all the fics that have yet to be written. And thank you for keeping me up super-late at night, preventing me from getting a good night's sleep and completely messing up my sleep schedule because you keep poking my brain until ungodly hours of night/early morning. How do I explain "insomnia from fanfic"? I didn't have this problem before. It's all your fault.

But I love you all anyway.

Love,

Me

--

P.S. Mags - congratulations, I'm really happy for you! <3

With all of the confusion of the past month, I was hoping to be able to return to writing. Thought I'd turned a corner, had a handle on things, but nooooooooooo. What did I do? I had to go and fall in love on top of everything. Now, I'm having trouble writing a grocery list. I admitted my long time feelings, and now my muse has gone off with his, I can only presume. Hope they send a postcard, since I can still read-- at least, I can today.

 

Why is it that I can only write if I'm hurt or unhappy or just plain stuck in my life??? Please understand I'm so happy I think my heart will burst right out of my body, but my brain refuses to continue a story line, or even think about plot twists.

 

My head hurts. I'm going to lie down.

I'm a month late on this but yes, YES. I get you Mags. I fell in love in October and haven't written a thing since. Until yesterday. My love has read all my fan fic and enjoyed it and was extremely disappointed when I stopped. But I just didn't have the drive or the desire to write fiction when I had something so wonderful in my life right there all the time. I didn't even have the desire to play ToR and that was where we met.

I'm starting to feel it come back now, though. Ipha and Brei started tapping at my mind, reminding me that their story isn't done and while they enjoyed their vacation, it's about time to get back to work. It'll come back and you'll be even richer for it.

I'm happy for you. I'm happy for me. I'm excited to share the rest of their story with him and with everyone else.