Im REALLY new to this game, i made a jedi consular, with intentions of turning shadow. however, i cannot find the place to get the quest or become shadow, the advanced trainer will not talk to me and i was told the first person you see off the ship to coruscant should give it to you. i did not recieve it. someone please help

What level are you? You need to be at least level 10 before the mission to pick an AC is available at the Fleet station.

 

If you follow your class story, you should be getting off Tython around 10 or 11.