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Sith Happens, the Chronicles of J'mpok Mogh

STAR WARS: The Old Republic > English > Community Content > Fan Fiction
Sith Happens, the Chronicles of J'mpok Mogh

Xakthul's Avatar


Xakthul
08.28.2013 , 09:46 PM | #1
Hi, all! This is not my first try at writing, but I've never posted here before. Give me HONEST opinions please!

I would give you a spoiler alert, but there IS a great big box under this that says SPOILER.

Spoiler


Spoiler
Duelist Mixalot, Grand Champ Tellsa, Lord Saml, Apprentice Syynx, Captain Cirris, Skirmisher Janewei, Jedi Knight Jugger'not, Agent Ez'zio of <Wookies and Cream>, Harbinger
"Aim for the trolls! Kill the trolls!"- Gandalf

Xakthul's Avatar


Xakthul
08.29.2013 , 11:16 AM | #2
My question is: Should I keep it in this format, or should I stick with the colors and make it a dialogue with the actions in *asterisks* ? I want an honest opinion, please.
Duelist Mixalot, Grand Champ Tellsa, Lord Saml, Apprentice Syynx, Captain Cirris, Skirmisher Janewei, Jedi Knight Jugger'not, Agent Ez'zio of <Wookies and Cream>, Harbinger
"Aim for the trolls! Kill the trolls!"- Gandalf

Adwynyth's Avatar


Adwynyth
08.29.2013 , 01:08 PM | #3
Love it so far, but I'd ditch the colors. The blue in particular is just too hard to read, but really I think the dialog was generally easy enough to follow without colors.

Definitely don't put the actions in asterisks IMHO. Making it look more like chat and less like literature wouldn't make it any easier to read. It would likely achieve the opposite.

By the way, your title is kinda already in use. Check the Alternate Universe Weekly Short Fiction Challenge Thread.
Horrendously bad fan fiction: Sith in a Pretty Dress

Xakthul's Avatar


Xakthul
08.29.2013 , 05:08 PM | #4
Quote: Originally Posted by Adwynyth View Post
Love it so far, but I'd ditch the colors. The blue in particular is just too hard to read, but really I think the dialog was generally easy enough to follow without colors.

Definitely don't put the actions in asterisks IMHO. Making it look more like chat and less like literature wouldn't make it any easier to read. It would likely achieve the opposite.

By the way, your title is kinda already in use. Check the Alternate Universe Weekly Short Fiction Challenge Thread.
Thanks, Adwyn. I can't find the post in the Alt universe weekly, but I may need help finding a new title. How does "The Sith Lord's Guide to the Galaxy" sound? Or "Mogh, J'm Mogh" sound? Was trying to paint that scene with the suit as him going James Bond on the Old Republic Tell me which one you think is better.

Cheers!

J'm
Duelist Mixalot, Grand Champ Tellsa, Lord Saml, Apprentice Syynx, Captain Cirris, Skirmisher Janewei, Jedi Knight Jugger'not, Agent Ez'zio of <Wookies and Cream>, Harbinger
"Aim for the trolls! Kill the trolls!"- Gandalf

Adwynyth's Avatar


Adwynyth
08.29.2013 , 08:19 PM | #5
I had difficulty finding it myself, probably because I used quotes around it when I posted it.

But bah...keep it. Mine's an AU story and isn't really going anywhere anyway.

If I repost as an actual story, I'll change the title anyway. That was actually just a desperation grab for something...anything to use as a title on my part. It fits your story much better.

[EDIT: Here's the latest post I made, with links to the others.]
Horrendously bad fan fiction: Sith in a Pretty Dress

Syart's Avatar


Syart
08.31.2013 , 01:52 AM | #6
I actually like the colours idea, I've used it myself, but the blue was very difficult to read. On the other hand, it can get complicated keeping track of which colour is which person once you have more than three or so *grins* So for your own sake you should stop

Nice beginning to the story though, looking forward to the continuation

Edit: Oh, and I would absolutely love to have a t-shirt with "SITH HAPPENS" in the Star Wars font on it. It would annoy or confuse practically everyone I know
Control, passion, diligence: these three principles shape your world.

Lord Scourge: To repeat a mistake and expect a beneficial outcome is a sign of insanity.

Xakthul's Avatar


Xakthul
09.02.2013 , 09:21 AM | #7
Spoiler
Duelist Mixalot, Grand Champ Tellsa, Lord Saml, Apprentice Syynx, Captain Cirris, Skirmisher Janewei, Jedi Knight Jugger'not, Agent Ez'zio of <Wookies and Cream>, Harbinger
"Aim for the trolls! Kill the trolls!"- Gandalf

Xakthul's Avatar


Xakthul
09.08.2013 , 06:22 PM | #8
I'm having writer's block..... I'll accept suggestions on what's to happen next.
Duelist Mixalot, Grand Champ Tellsa, Lord Saml, Apprentice Syynx, Captain Cirris, Skirmisher Janewei, Jedi Knight Jugger'not, Agent Ez'zio of <Wookies and Cream>, Harbinger
"Aim for the trolls! Kill the trolls!"- Gandalf

Xakthul's Avatar


Xakthul
09.14.2013 , 11:56 AM | #9
Write something already, will ya?

Huh? Vette? since when do you break the fourth wall?

Well, since you stopped writing, I have nothing to do... so WRITE SOMETHING!

Fine, fine... and I'll break the fourth wall, too.

Yay!

Spoiler



Spoiler



I will post more later, but I need to EAT!


Credit to Adwynyth, Doozzer, and bright_ephemera for inspiration, some lines (Thanks for the Cartman quote, Adwyn), and a format to start writing with.

Thanks for reading, guys!
Duelist Mixalot, Grand Champ Tellsa, Lord Saml, Apprentice Syynx, Captain Cirris, Skirmisher Janewei, Jedi Knight Jugger'not, Agent Ez'zio of <Wookies and Cream>, Harbinger
"Aim for the trolls! Kill the trolls!"- Gandalf

Xakthul's Avatar


Xakthul
09.14.2013 , 01:35 PM | #10
Now......

I am accepting requests for the next few "episodes" of this story. Does not have to be canon, story-based, or anything like that. It could be J'm and Satele Shan getting smashed as far as I'm concerned..... I just need to be able to make a funny story out of it.
Duelist Mixalot, Grand Champ Tellsa, Lord Saml, Apprentice Syynx, Captain Cirris, Skirmisher Janewei, Jedi Knight Jugger'not, Agent Ez'zio of <Wookies and Cream>, Harbinger
"Aim for the trolls! Kill the trolls!"- Gandalf