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When I Wake

Earthmama's Avatar

10.22.2012 , 04:09 PM | #101
What is it about flowers? Loved that last passage, and it reminds me again of why Belsavis, is still to this day (After 6 characters) my favorite planet. I totally did a cheesy sigh after reading this.

EverSteam's Avatar

10.22.2012 , 09:06 PM | #102
Quote: Originally Posted by MilaniGrey View Post
I'm running out of words to express how much I enjoy this story.

Quote: Originally Posted by iamthehoyden View Post
Love all of this. All all all of this.

The piece on the Tyrant - your bounty hunter is darker in many ways than mine was, but almost every reaction to Tormen - it was perfectly perfect. And seeing the piece right after in both her and Torian's perspectives was just excellent. And then her reactions to flowers on Belsavis - I love how she wants to be pretty. I love how that concerns her.

Just, really really love this.

Quote: Originally Posted by Earthmama View Post
What is it about flowers? Loved that last passage, and it reminds me again of why Belsavis, is still to this day (After 6 characters) my favorite planet. I totally did a cheesy sigh after reading this.
Everyone likes flowers XD
I like the thought that some one like her could like something as romantic and 'girlie' as flowers. Though some of her reasons for liking plants are a little.... not right.
Yeah, Belsavis and Voss are my favourites. Though halfway through Voss I always get frustrated with all classes that I'm not 50 yet and on Corellia.
Yay for cheesy sighs


And here's a link to my once again updated view from Torian in response to last post here.
It's alright. Has flowers, of course ;p

EverSteam's Avatar

10.23.2012 , 06:19 PM | #103
Later that night....

'What are you working on? Know what time it is, right?'

Torian lifts his head up from the small thing he is working on. I can't see his eyes. He hasn't raised his mask. I walk down the steps for a closer look as he turns the torch off.

It's late at night. Or early morning. Depends on your perspective. I heard him working on something. He does that sometimes. Never felt close enough to him to ask before. Guess I figure what he does in private is private. But I couldn't sleep. And privacy doesn't really exist on this ship. So I came down on an impulse and whim.

I sit down on a tool box across from him. He still doesn't raise the heat mask. Makes me feel self conscious. Like to see others eyes. Didn't think to put something over the torn, old shirt I wear as a dress. It has no sleeves anymore and is missing a few buttons. Some of the bottom of it is also torn. But it's comfortable and loose. And covers what it needs to.

He's not much better. No shirt. But he has long pants on. Doesn't seem safe to weld without a shirt on. Manly, but unsafe. We go fighting creatures, thugs, Jedi, soldiers and just about anything else on a daily basis and I'm saying that's unsafe? I shake my head. Like the view more than a little.

He keeps staring at me. I assume he's looking at me. 'New mod for your blaster. Was going to surprise you.'

I feel very self-conscious. If I thought it would help, I would wrap my arms around me. Guess I shouldn't of been so impulsive. I hate feeling vulnerable. 'Thanks, I guess.'

He lifts up his mask. His face is red from the heat. But it is earnest. And interestingly enough, his eyes are focusing on somewhere on my forehead or just above my head. Makes me smirk a little and feel more at ease. Don't think I like this silence, so I decide to break it. 'Didn't know you could craft. What else can you do?'

His lips twitch at this. Didn't mean it as flirtatious. 'Mods, enhancements, anything small and needing fine details. Not as good at larger armour. Competent, but barely.'

I nod. Interesting. Learn something new every day. Always wondered what Torian did for a hobby. Didn't seem fond of drinking or women. Just assumed he spent time practicing or... no idea really. Didn't know what he spent his share of the cut on either. Didn't have to check his like I do Gault's. Guess I know now. Maybe I don't know everything that goes on in the ship.

I don't know what to say now, so we sit in an uncomfortable silence. Too aware of the other, but neither wanting to show that they are.

'Got anything else you've made around? Would like to see.' Don't want to acknowledge the something we're feeling.

The corners of his mouth twitch up and he nods. He stands up and walks to his bed under the stairs. When he comes back, he has a medium size crate in his hands and a shirt on. He puts the crate in front of me, along with a half empty bottle of rum and two glasses and walks back to his bed. I feel something heavy fall onto my shoulders. I look at it. A blanket. I pull it around me.

Torian sits across from me. Back to normal now. I pour us a drink as he shows me things. Most are mods and enhancements. A pair of wrist guards. But there are also small metal statues. He doesn't take them out to show me and puts the crate back on the ground, hoping I won't notice as he describes the process for making mods. But I saw it wasn't empty and pick it up for myself. He almost challenges me. But doesn't.

There are intricate weldings of strange creatures. Some trees and other things. One I like best though is a flower. I remember seeing them on Taris. Picking it up and putting it behind my ear on impulse... It's beautiful. No other word could describe it. It shines in the light. There are tiny carvings along the petals and leaves. Veins. It's detail is amazing. Guess I must show my awe rather obviously.

I glance at him. He is staring at me. But looks away quickly. 'They're good. Pretty impressive, Torian.' An understatement. But he radiates pride. I pack the sculptures away and ask questions about the mods and barrels.

'Show me how to make them one day?' Strange gap in my education. Wonder why I don't. Guess they always gave me enough money and all the weapons I needed.

'Can now, if you like.' He's a little nervous but hides it well. Always so serious. I nod and he hands me a mask. He motions for me to come back over to the seat. I sit on the ground next to him. But he shakes his head moves me to his lap. He's tall enough to still see clearly over my head and I realise how tall he really is. Guess he really isn't a kid. Haven't thought of him like that in a long time.

He moves his arms around me, every now and again telling me to hold the torch or tongs as he reaches for other things, constantly giving instructions of what he's doing. Find it hard at first to listen and concentrate but then it become easy, and I relax against him. Never felt this comfortable in a man's arms before. Not sure what to do with these feelings. So I ignore it. And enjoy learning something new. And learning it from Torian.

I don't realise how long it has been until Mako walks into the room, rubbing sleep from her eyes but already dressed. 'What are you two doing? It's dawn already.' She looks at us suspiciously. We raise our masks but don't speak. Morning already. Should of been awake and half way through my exercises by now.

Mako shakes her head when we don't reply. 'Whatever. I'm going to make some breakfast. Want any?' She only looks at Torian. It grates on my nerves a little and I scowl at her. I glance at him and he seems oblivious. He switches off the torch, shakes his head and doesn't move. Blizz appears behind her and they wander off to the galley, Mako throwing me a glare before she disappears. Torian sighs and I slide off his lap. I stand up and can't think of what to do. So I decide to run away.

'Guess I'll have first shower. Maybe you can show me more another time.'

I turn and make for the shower. I don't know why I feel so flustered. But I do know why I feel more than a little annoyed at Mako. I smirk at the thought of whinging to Torian the other night on spending so much time training with me. I just laughed and walked out, leaving him to deal with her. I quickly undress and avoid looking at the woman in the mirror. The water is hot on my skin. Almost hurts.

When I return to my room, there's a bundle of red silk on my bed. My made bed. I never make my bed. I dry my hair with a towel as I walk over to it, and unwrap what's inside with my free hand.

It's the flower.

I pick it up and hold to my nose. It doesn't smell of course. But it's still beautiful and cold on my nose. I put it on the shelf above my bed. I go to throw the silk into a draw but stop when I see the note. I unfold it carefully, trying not to get it too wet.

Remember them on Taris?

Made it for you. Thought you might want the memento.

Hope it isn't worthless.*

I throw the towel on the ground and get dressed into my armour. I glance at the flower before leaving the room. It's far from worthless. I tuck the note into my desk draw. Not sure what else to do with it or these feelings.

For now, I think I will hide them from sight.


* Linked to the BH calling the flower 'worthless' once its crushed in the mud. In case you fogot XD


Ok, going to post a Torian soon XD
Then there'll be no more mentioning flowers

MilaniGrey's Avatar

10.23.2012 , 07:02 PM | #104
Wooords, how do I use them? Loved it, as always!
The Islingr Legacy
Ebon Hawk Server
"How dreadfully spooky." -- Vesaniae's Darth Nox

iamthehoyden's Avatar

10.23.2012 , 07:09 PM | #105
So sweet!
aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?
Fan Fiction: My Name is Solomon Crae The Man in the Box

EverSteam's Avatar

10.23.2012 , 09:53 PM | #106
Quote: Originally Posted by MilaniGrey View Post
Wooords, how do I use them? Loved it, as always!
Quote: Originally Posted by iamthehoyden View Post
So sweet!

Updated Yours to Hold.

EverSteam's Avatar

10.24.2012 , 06:31 PM | #107
In the shuttle down to Belsavis on the third day, Blizz is silent.

'Something up, Blizz?'

The Jawa looks nervous. Or as nervous as two eyes can look. He's kinda cute. Never thought of anything as cute before. I like him.

'Boss? Blizz have question about boss job?'

I smile at him encouragingly. I'm kind of gentle to the little guy. I'm glad I pulled him along. He's slightly scared of me. He's smart. 'Go on Blizz. Ask me anything. Haven't got any secrets from my crew.' A lie. But I don't mind. They don't need to know about that. Torian doesn't need to know about that.

'Blizz pretty sure Boss is not pirate, but boss beats up lots of people. Blizz confused about what Boss does.'

I laugh a little. Not meanly. I don't smirk. I glance at Torian. He is standing next to me, both across from Blizz. His mouth is twitching. Gault is looking bored and standing apart from us. He hasn't take to our newest member. Don't think he likes the removal of our drinking again.

'Well, Blizz. What I do is pretty simple. I'm a bounty hunter. I track down individuals no one else can find.' And kill them. Usually. 'Sometimes, people try and get in my way. That's all.'

'So boss find people in hard to reach places. Boss sounds more like salvager than pirate.' I grin. He's kinda got it. I don't really want him to. I want to protect this bizarre, innocent view of the world. I want his good opinion. 'That's okay with Blizz. Blizz likes salvager better anyway.' He seems resolute. All questions gone. Everything clear and simple. Understood. Wish things were really as simple as he sees them.

'I'm glad we're on the same page. Mostly.' I smile down at him. The shuttle rocks. We hold on tighter. We will be landing soon. I don't understand why there are no seats for passengers. Pain shoots through my arm. It twisted. I let go gasping. Torian catches me in one arm. Holding me close. He doesn't let go even when the turbulence stops. I don't try to move. I don't want to do what's harder. For this moment, I allow myself to be weak.

'Space things confuse Blizz sometimes. But Blizz smart. He figures them out eventually.' Blizz misses his old crew. He wants to be with them. I know we are no replacements. Too filled with our own disagreements and rifts. It doesn't grate on my nerves that he hopes to see them again. Not like Mako does.

'I find people for a living, Blizz. You'll see them again. I promise.'

It makes Blizz happy. He is practically jumping. I imagine a large smile under his eyes. I am not lying. I do find people for a living. And I will make sure that before the end, he will see his crew again.

Torian's arm tightens around me.

We land on Belsavis.

EverSteam's Avatar

10.25.2012 , 07:10 PM | #108
Later on the same day...

We thaw the agitators.

I was thinking more murderers but I could tell as my hand hovered over the screen, Torian was disapproving. He smiles when I change my mind. Amazing that some are going to owe their lives to the fact that I like to see him smile. Have to slaughter some more prisoners on the way out then.

Ruger calls. He's the 'law man' here on Balsavis. One the Sith warned me about. Makes an empty threat. I go and stay where I please for as long as I please. 'You have no idea who you are talking to. I'm more than a bounty hunter.'

He threatens me with jail. I've already escaped the worst jail the Republic has to offer. I am free. And I will do anything to stay that way. Even burn the galaxy to the ground.


Some time later around dusk on the same day...

We carve our way back to the space port.

I'm up close and shooting. Torian at my back. We are surrounded. But it's ok. I'm enjoying cracking a few skulls. Can't think of anything I'd rather be doing. Well...

Torian is distractingly close. Ever since we... left Hoth the first time, I have been different. I find things harder to control and ignore. Tormen only made it worse. Don't think I realised how strong I felt it till I was confronted with the reality I could lose him at any moment. Don't think I have ever been so distracted either. I want two things at once and I'm scared of one. I don't want to admit these things in words. Never thought I'd be scared of a man again. I hate the things I can't fight.

'Ever eaten Mandalorian food?' Torian ducks and dodges between blaster shots while still protecting my back. He takes down one. 'Switch.' We swap places. I flame thrower the prisoners while Torian ducks behind them. Attacking from the back.

'At your coronation maybe?' We continue fighting and shooting. Slowly we make it closer to the exit of the cave.

'Are you asking me to dinner?' I grapple hook one of the fighters off Torian, leaving him room to move. I feel blissful. I would smile, but it's hard when fighting ten rift lurkers. I seem to be making a habit of these feelings. A nice change. We break through the entrance only to find more prisoners in an ambush.

'Maybe.' His voice is low and warm. A loud yes. I beam. We look at each. Somehow, this moment became the sweetest of my life. I smirk a little. Certainly knows how to impress a girl.

'Duck.' We say it in unison. We both duck down. The soldiers shoot each other in the chest. Two more down. If I'm honest with myself, I would admit that I'm tired. I need more serum. I've had to boost it to twice a day for awhile. I'm in pain. But I'm happy. As we kill the last of the soldiers, I think it's nice to be alive.

'How would I know if it was Mando food?' We stop running and rest and a little. Just another hour if we don't get into too many more fights. Torian perches on a rock. I stand and drink. I reload and recharge everything. Then I notice. Torian is bleeding from his leg. He waves away my offers to heal it. I do it anyway, resting on my knees. I don't take orders from anyone. Even him. He doesn't complain. You would think they would teach Mandalorians how to use a med pac.

'If your sinus' got burned it was probably Mandalorian.' He makes a gesture around his nose. His eyes never leave what he can see of my face. Always staring. 'Hetikles. "Noseburn". It's how you know it's good.'

'So it was meant to do that? I was starting to think Mandalore was trying to poison me.' Torian nods and twitches at the same time. New again. 'I'm joking.' I roll my eye. He stops nodding. And instead smiles. I'm not good at jokes. Funny has never really had an opportunity to exist in my life till now. And Torian takes Mando things more serious than most. A lot more serious. Guess he has a lot to prove. So much for gar taldin ni jaonyc; gar sa buir, ori'wadaas'la.

I finish on his leg and sit at the bottom of his rock. I rest my head back and close my eye. Dirt is getting tangled in my hair. I breathe evenly. I like this planet. It has a strange wild beauty. Even to me. I concentrate on Torian's heart beat. I know it so well, I sometimes think it is mine. It lessens the pain. Even in thermal, this world is amazing.

'I was thinking I'd make you some tiingilar. See what you think.'

I open my eye. I can't see his face. He is looking out. Straight ahead. I had gotten use to his constant watching. 'That depends. Will I live through it?' I smile a little. It's close to a smirk.

He chuckles. It reverberates in my ear and in my chest. 'Think of it as a challenge, cyare.'

An automatic word used in an unguarded moment. He looks away quickly after it's said. Don't think he meant to add the last word. Under his serious charade, I can see a blush. It's highly endearing. Know he's called me that a few other times. Never thought about it before, though. Always had something more urgent to think about.

'Cyare, huh?' I pause for a brief moment and he glances at me. I wink. He looks sharply away again. I lean against his leg. He goes rigid, but doesn't move away. 'You know I can't resist a challenge. That reminds me, I count 168 for the day in total.'

'170.' I look at him sceptically. It should have been twenty lower. At least. More like 40 lower. 'There were some you didn't quite finish.' He teases. I think. It's difficult to tell sometimes. His face is so often set as serious I have to search for more. I like looking. And sometimes, I think I like what I find. 'It just means you have to let me cook. For you cy-.'

He stops abruptly and doesn't try to cover it with another word. Just leaves it hanging in a little pause. We don't always need to speak. Often, we spend hours sitting together, when everyone else is asleep, in silence. I like those nights. On those nights, Torian doesn't lie awake as long. Or stay up in his chair.

'You never said you could cook. Might have saved us many horrible nights.'

He shrugs in reply and after a while speaks. 'They say a woman who can eat a whole plate of tiingilar is a keeper.'

My chest heaves and I have a strange feeling of uncontrollable smiling. I feel happy. I think happiness is what I feel. It has been so far away for so long until recently, an old and forgotten thing. I'm still not sure if such a small word can be what this overwhelming, elated and ecstatic feeling can be brought down to. But I still don't allow much hope for the future. But in this moment, I believe. And I trust.

'I accept your challenge then.'

'Good.' He looks at me. And for a moment, I see into him. He is happy. Proud. Ecstatic. Nervous. And then it's gone. And the almost stoic, charming Mandalorian is all I see. He wears a large smile. It seems slightly relieved.

'I'll fix you some, soon as I can get back to the galley.'

'Well, at this rate it will already be tomorrow.' I stand up and punch his shoulder lightly, the metal on metal making a strange clang sound. He still cringes. 'I bet I can get their faster and still have more kills.'

He grins. 'You're on'.

I'm already running.


Please comment
Think it was slightly off but close enough. Makes me happy

MilaniGrey's Avatar

10.25.2012 , 07:24 PM | #109
Adorable Torian/Hunter moments always make me happy.
The Islingr Legacy
Ebon Hawk Server
"How dreadfully spooky." -- Vesaniae's Darth Nox

iamthehoyden's Avatar

10.25.2012 , 07:45 PM | #110
Ahhh!! The cuteness
aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?
Fan Fiction: My Name is Solomon Crae The Man in the Box