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if you want to invite me to party, ASK ME first.

STAR WARS: The Old Republic > English > General Discussion
if you want to invite me to party, ASK ME first.

Kabjat's Avatar


Kabjat
01.29.2012 , 12:14 PM | #1
EDIT: I suppose after all of the discussion that has happened on this thread, I should probably temper my original post with a bit of humility. Yes, humility because I am grateful for all of the feedback and the fact that I have come to understand something of the other way of thinking.

Also, let me qualify this for any new readers who stumble upon this thread: I DO NOT have a problem with blind invites in the case where it is OBVIOUS everyone in the immediate area is waiting for the same objective.



I have taken the liberty to circumvent the obvious retorts to my post with the following hypothetical questions:

"If you don't wanna be invited to groups, you should just go play a single-player game."

No. I don't mind being invited to groups. What I do mind is someone inviting me to party without showing me the courtesy of ASKING me first if I wish to party with them. Inviting without a word is not the same as asking.

"Turn on auto-decline group invites if you are such an anti-social person. Gawd, it's an MMO, people group to do stuff."

I love to group with people in order to meet a common objective. In fact, I am usually quite enthusiastic to party up with other players...provided they are willing to behave in a social manner themselves by being POLITE. It's RUDE to ninja-invite. Is it so hard to WHISPER someone and ask them if they even WANT to do the same thing you are doing?

And incidentally, I HAVE toggled auto-decline after today...didn't even know it was an option till my husband showed me. It cheeses me off that I have to and that people are so socially stunted that they can't be bothered to ASK first.

I'm all for efficiency. But when someone just spams me with his party invite without any regard to what I may be doing, it just makes me NOT want to party with him on principle alone. Like, even if I do want to do the same thing he wants to do, Saving Face, Personal Challenge, whatever....if he sends an invite without asking first, it's a forgone conclusion that I will NOT group with that person.
Quote: Originally Posted by Thaltom View Post
Are you playing TOR on an Atari Potato?

IIII-IIII-IIII's Avatar


IIII-IIII-IIII
01.29.2012 , 12:16 PM | #2
This is definitely an old schooler posting. I applaud the mentality, actually.

Perhaps it's an over reaching assumption but I generally just avoid the groups entirely when the leader practices this. More times than not, it's a foreshadowing of the experience you'll have once grouped with said leader.
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Operative Iron Citadel
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GarbonzotheDude's Avatar


GarbonzotheDude
01.29.2012 , 12:19 PM | #3
What really irritates me is they always seem to have the knack for doing it when you're in the middle of doing something like combat, selling items, speaking to a quest giver, etc.

Kabjat's Avatar


Kabjat
01.29.2012 , 12:21 PM | #4
even MORE astounding is when you hit decline, the invite reappears....as if the player thinks that there must be some mistake or he will wear me down by attrition.

My children do that when trying to get what they want. Too bad I don't have toggle auto-decline for them too. >.<
Quote: Originally Posted by Thaltom View Post
Are you playing TOR on an Atari Potato?

Cormey's Avatar


Cormey
01.29.2012 , 12:24 PM | #5
I agree with the OP, I also turn down invites if i don't get asked first.

Actually in another MMOG just today i got someone inviting me to group and inviting me to be their freind without a single word, as you can guess both got denied.
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uteboy's Avatar


uteboy
01.29.2012 , 12:24 PM | #6
For me, depends on the situation.

If we're all standing around waiting on a spawn that we have to kill, just invite me already. I've had several groups that have formed, killed the mob and disbanded without so much as a word.

If I'm out questing in the world and you want me to join your FP, or you need a hand with something and your randomly working your way down the who list, then ask me first.

SamuraBob_Fl's Avatar


SamuraBob_Fl
01.29.2012 , 12:27 PM | #7
Quote: Originally Posted by uteboy View Post
For me, depends on the situation.

If we're all standing around waiting on a spawn that we have to kill, just invite me already. I've had several groups that have formed, killed the mob and disbanded without so much as a word.

If I'm out questing in the world and you want me to join your FP, or you need a hand with something and your randomly working your way down the who list, then ask me first.
^This.

If we're waiting on spawns I'm not going to type out an invite because it's pretty clear what's going on, and someone else might grab the spawn whilst I'm typing.

But that's the only time it's cool.
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JCommando's Avatar


JCommando
01.29.2012 , 12:28 PM | #8
This is what people must think when they see me questing on Ilum while healing Khem. "OMG ITS A HEALZZZ I WONDER IF THEYLL DO HEROICS WIT ME???"

Spams invites. I explain I'm doing the heroics with my guild later. He sits there and gets cross eyed and types stupid responses that I can't understand while STILL inviting me. Auto-decline is on now. It's annoying but I have to deal with it.

Edit: To clarify he invited me 3 times before saying anything to me about declining them.
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cyberxeit's Avatar


cyberxeit
01.29.2012 , 12:30 PM | #9
One of the weird swtor players who untill wonder that not single-player game, but still playing like it's KotOR 3 and everywhere just a NPC.
Click on the invite button is esiest way to add someone to party instead of start talking.

If I see the someone who kill the same mobs as I need it - I always invite him. And rarely it's someone like post-starter who blame me with the wisper "you so rude! I'm never accept inite without 10kB whispers" and so on. Just relax! It's only game. And I'm talking to your by party-chat, just accept to invite the party before.

Think positively, make friendly to other players and everyone be alright.

IIII-IIII-IIII's Avatar


IIII-IIII-IIII
01.29.2012 , 12:31 PM | #10
Quote: Originally Posted by cyberxeit View Post
One of the weird swtor players who untill wonder that not single-player game, but still playing like it's KotOR 3 and everywhere just a NPC. Click on the invite button is esiest way to add someone to party instead of start talking.
exhibit A
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Operative Iron Citadel
Infiltration, Manipulation, Assassination