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The Expanded Universe ???? LOL ?

STAR WARS: The Old Republic > English > STAR WARS Discussion
The Expanded Universe ???? LOL ?

WerniesSturm's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 04:41 AM | #1
I'm a huge SW fan (movies)
Since Im playing SWTOR, I wanted to do a little research on the old republic, very interesting indeed.
In the past I also encountered names like Ben Skywalker and such so I wondered what happened after the Battle of Endor, the chosen one fullfilling and the Sith destroyed and peace forever.

But seriously ***, what idiot (IMO) came up with whatever happened after. Stole this from another website:

Stole this from another site:

Undoing the Ending of Return of the Jedi

Everything had wrapped up nicely at the end of Return of the Jedi. We see the Imperial menace defeated over the forest moon of Endor by the likes of Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Han Solo, Chewbacca the Wookiee and Lando "The Last Black Man in the Galaxy" Calrissian.

The Emperor's plan to recruit Luke to the dark side failed, and Darth Vader redeemed himself by dunking the raisin-faced bastard into the reactor core of the Death Star like Lebron James. Vader, electrocuted and hairless--and decidedly not James Earl Jones--died and the Death Star exploded, effectively wiping out the Sith, releasing their chokehold on the Galaxy and infuriating whoever was the lienholder on the destroyed battle station.

Simultaneous celebrations were held on countless planets because evidently news travels fast through the infinite expanse of *********** space. Our heroes dance with some teddy bears and the credits roll.

Not so fast:

That is, the Empire keeps rolling right along, imposing space-tyranny on all who stand in their way.

And the thing is, it's hard to argue with the idea.

Neither the Emperor nor the Death Star had ever been a threat to the Rebellion, so, you know, **** those first three movies. The Imperials had been able to control the Galaxy without a Death Star for a couple of decades, relying instead on fleet warfare and ground support for good old fashioned genocide. As for the Emperor, does killing the leader of a tyrannical government with a powerful and loyal army immediately end the entire conflict?

According to the majority of the books and comics set after the original trilogy, with the Emperor gone, there were hundreds of Admirals, Generals and Politicians who vied for control of the Galaxy. Without a universally accepted leader, the Empire spiraled into a civil war.

The Rebellion is still, well, a Rebellion, which means it still has to gain victory over the remaining Imperials to win, who are in turn fighting amongst themselves. And so, the Skywalker family, which you may remember as being the entire point of the Star Wars saga, fades into the background as we watch the Rebels continue to fight two different Empires for 20 more years. During that time it's fair to assume billions more people died and trillions more words of poorly written dialog were spoken.

Cloning the emperor

Oh, hey, speaking of the dead Emperor, he is dead, right? After all, Darth Vader basically sacrificed himself to kill the man and wipe out this dark threat to The Force for all time.

Yes, that sure was a meaningful sacrifice Anakin made to redeem himself and save countless lives.

Not so fast...

Once more, you can see why they did it. You need a villain. And if George Lucas had written the sequel stories, it's hard to believe he wouldn't have done the same, after he contorted every prequel storyline to shoehorn in as many OT characters as he could.

In this storyline, Palpatine, secure in his new corporeal digs, proceeds to use a variety of nifty tactics that nearly annihilate the Rebels. The reasons why he waited until after his death to employ these tactics are beyond even the wisest of us.

To make things worse, Luke Skywalker, forgetting absolutely everything about his dad's story arc, thought the best way to deal with this threat was by becoming Palpatine's new apprentice. Although he tries to sabotage the Empire's efforts from the inside, he eventually succumbs to the Dark Side, presumably because the temptation of paid vacation and a dental plan proved to be too great.

After Luke essentially becomes the Sega Genesis to Vader's Master System, Leia comes to her brother's rescue and eventually redeems him (you may remember this as the exact same plot of the original trilogy). Unfortunately it's already too late for most of the galaxy, as the Empire has already managed to decimate entire worlds without a Death Star and is within sight of total victory (evidently "total victory" means "killing every last mother****er in space").

Palps is eventually killed by Empatojayos Brand, an ancient Jedi better known as Master Desperate Plot Device, thus ending the crisis and allowing the Dark Empire series to stop wasting our gosh darn time.

Adding a bunch of new jedi

Pretty much the entire point of the original trilogy was that Luke Skywalker, son of Darth Vader, is the last hope for the Jedi Order and the Galaxy. You know, the other Jedi having been ruthlessly hunted down and destroyed by the Empire and all.

The only exceptions are Obi Wan, whose force powers seem to have degenerated into keeping an immaculately trimmed beard in the middle of the desert, and Yoda, who seems to have gone so ******* insane that all he can do is talk like Super Grover in cryptic nonsensical jibber-jabber and lift **** out of bogs with his mind.

With only these three superpowered individuals left, the future of the Galaxy seems bleak.

Not so fast...

One thing the good guys have to do to deal with the post-Death Star Empire is enlist the help of Jedi. Lots of them. In "sequel" comics like Dark Forces, much of the plot involves enlisting the help of these guys that are just hanging around in remote parts of the galaxy.

As it turns out, contrary to popular belief (a term which here means "what the films specifically told us in no uncertain terms"), the Jedi were not entirely wiped out but merely went into hiding. Again, we understand it's not Star Wars without Jedi and you can't wait for an army to be rebuilt from Luke and Leia's inbred children. The writers only had so many options.

But are we really to believe that these characters just sat on their fat asses, doing nothing to help while their Jedi brethren were getting thrown in the dumpster? That seems just a little out of character for the Galaxy's "Protectors of Freedom."

Superweapons That Make the Death Star Look Like a Pile of ****

All right, so maybe you think we were taking it too far when we said destroying the Death Star(s) didn't really change anything. After all, clearly these weapons were taking the Empire's power to a new level. The Death Stars were to be a planet-destroying game-changer, forever cementing their hold on the galaxy.

So if nothing else, taking them out dealt a serious blow to their plans.

Not so Fast...

Well, in the course of the Extended Universe stories, dozens of other, more powerful superweapons are introduced, some so over-the-top that, in retrospect, taking out the Death Star should've been right below "Remember to take Mittens to the vet" on the Webbel's To-Do List.

And some of them get ridiculous. Evidently the Empire set aside a little too much funding for the Board of Unnecessary Destruction.
The Galaxy Gun is a great example.

Although its name lacks the same pant****-inspiring sound as the Death Star, we are told it is a lot more powerful. It was first used during the reborn Emperor's campaign against the Rebels (see Cloning the Emperor, above), and during its operational history it destroyed more worlds than the Death Star. Making that count at least... two.

There is also the Sun Crusher, which we have to admit is the most ****** name ever given to any weapon, ever.

To sum it up, it basically does what its name suggests, firing a bunch of missiles into a star and causing it to collapse and go supernova, destroying the entire surrounding system by way of make-believe science.

Unfortunately, we already saw the planet-busting ultra gun in two out of the three original movies, so you can probably guess how the storylines involving both of these turned out (if you said "the Rebels enact a daring offensive that destroys the weapon," you are correct).

Creating a new sith empire:

Of course, even though the Emperor comes back and the Empire rises again, the webbels do eventually prevail. Sure, it took a couple of decades after the events of the OT, but we at least know that one day a gray-haired Han Solo and crew got to see their dream of an evilless galaxy come true.

Not So Fast...

According to the Star Wars Legacy comics, 100 years after the original trilogy, the galaxy has supposedly seen several major wars and enough political maneuvering to turn the franchise into a Tom Clancy novel. During that century, the Rebellion formed into the New Republic and then into the Galactic Alliance, eventually making peace with the Empire and allying with them on several occasions.

Luke Skywalker, again demonstrating his complete and total dementia, forgets every single detail about his father's life and builds a new Jedi Order that encourages emotional ties and marriages. Han Solo and Princess Leia have three kids, one of whom turns into a Sith, and Luke has a son with some redhead.

All of a sudden the Sith reappear. Again.

And, again, the Empire declares war on the Galactic Alliance, easily crushing their allied nuts and installing their Sith leader as Emperor of the Galaxy. Again.

They go on to lead a surprise attack against the Jedi, killing most of them and forcing the rest into hiding.


Meanwhile the scattered remnants of the Alliance begin a guerilla war against their much more powerful adversary while Luke's son, a young Jedi named Skywalker, must use his powerful Force abilities to try and destroy the evil Sith Emperor.

Our more clever readers may have noticed a small curiosity regarding this storyline: It is, word for word, the exact *********** plot of the entire Star Wars saga. Not just a recycled plot device like a new superweapon (see above), but the whole gosh darn plot.


What about Darth Maul with robot legs ?

The yuuzong vong or something like that, the only thing that is not connected to the force ( all things are? )

Rhyltran's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 05:24 AM | #2
Some of this is uneededly sarcastic and biased. It's not as bad as it makes it out to be. Second, Darth Maul with robot legs is non canon. The Yuuzhan Vong were cut off from the force but this is explained. If you want unbiased I recommend you start with the thrawn series. You may be pleasantly surprised at how good it is.

It takes place after the movies and is a good series of novels. It's what got me into the EU. Is the EU always great? No and it does have it's share of problems but a lot of it is actually pretty good.

Beastorz's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 06:25 AM | #3
Heh, I won't lie some of the things mentioned are quite silly (Dark Empire stuff with cloned Palpatine, etc.) but for the most part I find the newer series of books more interesting and much less far fetched. New Jedi Order and everything following.

Plus, have you looked at the "Old Republic" era beyond this game? There's some pretty neat content there as well.
Vaalbeast - Scoundrel
The Harbinger

Rayla_Felana's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 07:15 AM | #4
Post-RotJ EU killed the point of the Saga, Vader kills the Emperor, then some time later he comes back MORE POWERFUL THAN BEFORE, what was the damned point?

/QQ off.

BrandonSM's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 07:34 AM | #5
Trolling? I think so.
Hapan: "This creature has information that could lead us to a woman who has been kidnapped. We will get that information."
Luke: "This woman is a citizen of the New Republic, and if you do not take your hands off her, I will take your hands off you."

Bielduwyn's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 08:59 AM | #6
Well hey, the prequels are overflowing with silly. Perhaps Lucas took inspiration from the EU novels... except those usually have better dialogue.

eloco's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 09:24 AM | #7
All of starwars is pretty stupid, I dont understand why I love it so much. This post just puts it into words beyond my ability to do so. I had a few good chuckles.
January/4/2011 Leader of the 'Useless elevator outside D7 Flashpoint entrance Fanclub'.

JediLiam's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 09:32 AM | #8
/Mouth open at the EPIC WALL OF TEXT!

But in all seriousness...... GREAT POST DUDE! well done

Stranger_D's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 09:36 AM | #9
All the above reason are one that I stop reading EU novel.

But for the good side, we still have several neat videogame and the clones war series. That was enough for me to ignore them.

Tiars's Avatar

01.01.2012 , 10:36 AM | #10
All that you are pointing out is that much of the support for the post RotJ EU stories try to inject some reality into the Star Wars Universe. That reality being that with the Number 1 and number 2 from the Empire gone that empire simply surrenders.

Lucas himself stated that he envisioned three movie trilogies. The first trilogy was the rise of the Empire. The second trilogy was the GCW. The final trilogy was about the restoration of the Republic. So from the very beginning the end of RotJ was not the end of the Empire, it was the beginning of the end.

Like every story the post RotJ EU stories do have problems with recycling story themes and recycling defeated/dead enemies. DC comics and the Star Trek novels are as bad about this as the SW EU stories. While not good, it happens.

I enjoy some of the EU stories and hate others. But Lucas accepting them as Star Wars Canon is totally different and unless you really want to say that Lucas has no concern for Star Wars and is only interested in the money. So unless you are ready to go that far and ignore Canon, they are part of the SW universe, even if we do not like them.