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Books written by Star Wars characters that you wouldn't buy


Aurbere

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I know that this has been done before, but I loved reading all of the ideas people have for these books so why not start it up again.

 

Here are some ideas to start off.

 

The art of control: How to keep your apprentice from throwing you down a reactor core shaft. By Palpatine

Difficult choices: choosing between your son and the man eletrocuting him. By Darth Vader

How to become one with the Force. By Cin Drallig with an intro from a majority of his students

 

That's to start us off.

Edited by Aurbere
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I would by the 3rd one, why not? Seems legit. Anyway

 

How to chase down a bike on the back of a beast: by Obi-Wan

 

How to cope with finding out your real father, is a dark lord of the sith by Luke Skywalker

Edited by Wolfninjajedi
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I would by the 3rd one, why not? Seems legit. Anyway

 

How to chase down a bike on the back of a beast: by Obi-Wan

 

How to cope with finding out your real father, is a dark lord of the sith by Luke Skywalker

 

lol. Your sig made me think of that 3rd one. I was thinking about it and I burst out laughing, scared everyone in the house too.

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"incest is best" a collaboration by luke and leia

 

You beat me to it. I was going to put something along those lines up too.

 

Here's one by Ben Kenobi: Seeing the truth from a certain point of view. Lying about family connections to save the galaxy.

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"Rags to Riches! How You Too Can Take Over The Galaxy!" by Darth Sidious... only for the truly ambitious.

 

"Puddles of Tears: Poetry For The Angst Ridden" by Anakin Skywalker

 

"Padme and Anakin, Luke and Leia, or How My Family Tree Almost Got Screwed Up" by Jacen Solo, and foreward by Han Solo.

 

"Effective Bounty Hunting Techniques" by Greedo

 

"Who Moved My Legs?" by Darth Maul

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Ha! I'm with you on this one :)

 

But shouldn't it be How to Get the Redhead of Your Nightmares?

 

Nah. She was pretty much the only girl he ever got with. So of course she's the redhead of his dreams. :D

 

Now, as to the 3 books I would never buy:

 

Daddy Issues: FInding Out Your Father Tried to Kill You During the Death Star Run by Luke Skywalker

 

My Sister KISSED ME!!! also by Luke Skywalker

 

Surviving Jabba's Palace by Oola

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"Rags to Riches! How You Too Can Take Over The Galaxy!" by Darth Sidious... only for the truly ambitious.

 

"Puddles of Tears: Poetry For The Angst Ridden" by Anakin Skywalker

 

"Padme and Anakin, Luke and Leia, or How My Family Tree Almost Got Screwed Up" by Jacen Solo, and foreward by Han Solo.

 

"Effective Bounty Hunting Techniques" by Greedo

 

"Who Moved My Legs?" by Darth Maul

 

All of these are hilarious. Good stuff. I'd read the one by Greedo just for kicks.

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Nah. She was pretty much the only girl he ever got with. So of course she's the redhead of his dreams. :D

 

Now, as to the 3 books I would never buy:

 

Daddy Issues: FInding Out Your Father Tried to Kill You During the Death Star Run by Luke Skywalker

 

My Sister KISSED ME!!! also by Luke Skywalker

 

Surviving Jabba's Palace by Oola

 

Surviving Jabba's palace. Add in a foreward by Jabba and were good.

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Here's a few more.

 

Blaster ready, how to take out a scout trooper from behind. by Han Solo

Reactor core safety and thermal exhaust shielding. by the Death Star tech teams

How to fight a blind man. by Boba Fett

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you beat me to it. I was going to put something along those lines up too.

 

Here's one by ben kenobi: Seeing the truth from a certain point of view. Lying about family connections to save the galaxy.

 

lol !

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Great sig Eillack.

Why Was the Second Death Star Also Destroyed? By: The Same People Who Built the First Death Star.

Not a book, but How I Meet and Kill Your Mother By: Darth Vader, with an Introduction from the Emperor titled, How to Arrange a Marrige to Take Over the Galaxy

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I Hate Sand, But Love You: a romance novel by Annie Skywalker

 

Moon-Jitsu: advanced techniques to battle rouge moons. By Chewbacca

 

Win friends and confuse the rest: Jar-Jars’ guide to effective speaking.

 

Moon-Jitsu. Awesome. And Jar Jar's guide to speaking. Yeah, no way will I buy that. Unless I want to sound like a fool.

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