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When I Wake

EverSteam's Avatar

09.26.2012 , 05:47 AM | #1
Fanfiction of female Bounty Hunter.
Romance x Torian Cadera, action, drama, angst, strange comedy at points, the usual.

Follows Bounty Hunter storyline and includes a massive back story and the such - set at the end of the Great Hunt (Act One) and will eventually contain relationship and story spoilers. Will probably be very long, but updated frequently! Please give it a chance!

Italics = flashback or thoughts

Below is a short synopsis of the character and story if you want to know what you're in for.


WARNING: By the way, there's some 'distressing' or 'disturbing' content... i.e. torture. Will put spoiler around this.
Also, since eventually this thread will have spoilers eventually there won't be any around them so you have bee warned...

Boring disclaimer/copyrights:

Please comment and give feedback! Just once or frequently as it goes! Will always be appreciated
Please keep reading past the prolouge and at least till the end of Hoth.... haven't finished writing since I'm doing it as I play and the such. Will update heaps so please be patient!


When I Wake


Undefined planet before the start of Act One

I was cleaning my armour when he calls.

Despite my best efforts, the blood from my earlier interrogations had dried on. The Captain had taken longer than I expected. He had wiped the terminal when he heard me massacring the troops and coming his way, so it was back to old fashioned methods. Eventually, he told me the location of the covert Republic base here. And the security codes. Didn't need him after that. Suppose I could say I gave him a clean death at the end, only I had made too much of a mess of him in the three hours earlier.

Would have gone after the bounty straight away but it's day outside and dried blood is harder to clean off then wet. I'll go after the target at dusk. Isn't more than two clicks from here. I look around at where 'here' is as I search for my holo. The cave is dark and a little damp; it seethes through the bottom of the tent like a poison. I don't mind. I'm at the back of the cave, traps set all down the cave from the opening to here. Nothing will make it to me alive.

This bounty shouldn't be too hard. These bounties are a waste of my talents. But I suppose I need to prove myself good enough for the Great Hunt somehow. Hope they are good enough to attract attention. And I was in the area anyway. Had some personal business to take care of. I'll hit the underground base tomorrow night.

I accept the call. The tiny, blue flittering figure that appears is a man. He's middle aged. Human. Bald with hard creases around his mouth. Still in rather good shape, otherwise.

'So do you want in? I have a team ready; we only need a hunter.'

Guy said his name was Braden. Suits him. He has a team ready for the Great Hunt and wants me to be their hunter. Opportunity I'd been waiting for. Not much else suits my talents but hunting. Guess I also want to prove I can do it on my own: my targets, my rules and my money. Don't know why it should matter, though. General's dead. And I've been killing for ten years, so capability to kill is proven. So I suppose I just want to burn my name through the stars as a warning to the Republic of what is to come.

This is the twelfth planet in the five months. But I don't want to be an unknown force to most of the galaxy, unheard of to those who aren't in the Organisation. I want fame. I want the galaxy to know who burns their Empire and Republic. I want them to despise themselves for the monster they created; the beast their leaders, soldiers and scientists crafted and fashioned.

I want to make this galaxy as ugly as I am; to shatter and break their charade of beauty, of justice and of good. And then I want them to beg for mercy. No one deserves to live.


'You got yourself a hunter. Just tell me where.'

Braden smiles. It's relieved. 'Hutta. Great Hunt starts in two months. When can we expect you?'

'Be there in three weeks. Got a few things to wrap up here.'

He frowns a little. 'Can't be sooner? Cutting it a little close.'

'I like it close.' I hang up.

Great Hunt, huh? Opportunity all bounty hunters and most Mandalorians want. It's an annual tournament held by Mando's to determine the greatest bounty hunter in the galaxy. All targets are high profile and hard to get. Each target has two bounty hunters going after it. Hunters must eliminate the competition and the target. Failure to do so is death. The victor receives wealth and fame. Both mean little to me.

I live for revenge. I hate this galaxy. And I just like a challenge.

I hum as I clean the blood off my armour. Everything according to plan.

EverSteam's Avatar

09.26.2012 , 05:54 AM | #2
There's always confusion when you wake up from a deep sleep. Sometimes, the dreams are so genuine, you find it hard to believe the world you suddenly see is real. There is uncertainty. The dream still lingers, and you feel that as it slips away, you are losing something important.

You can't remember what that thing is. Only that you want it back. And it has left a hard, cold sadness, an overwhelming weeping pain in its place that spreads through your body.

This is your reality.

EverSteam's Avatar

09.26.2012 , 06:02 AM | #3
Dromund Kaas


Today is my day.

When I wake up, I leave Gault lying on the couch. Not out of kindness. I don't remember sleeping in the makeshift rec room. I have distinct memories of going to my own room. I shake it away. I feel something close to giddiness. And it makes me want to enjoy this morning on my own. I put on some simple woven shirt. It's old and faded. I polish my armour for the occasion. Black. Shining with points like stars, red highlighting the shoulders. It glistens. I almost hum.

He smiles. 'You are a born killer. I will train you to become the greatest assassin. Innocent and heartless.' Always smiling. My cell is cold.

I do my routine workout. It forces other thoughts from my mind. Gault wakes up half way through my push ups. He mumbles something about 'no breakfast in bed' and winces at the lights in the ship. Mako runs down from her room, half dressed and still wet from the shower. All excited and jabbering to herself. I continue my work out.

I put on my armour. For such a small ship, it's easy to get lost in. Thank God. I grab something that I think is meant to be green from the galley and walk to the exit, eating noiselessly. Mako's already there, practically jumping on the spot. 'Today's the big day!' She prattles on about that father/mentor guy of hers, Braden, being proud. He was killed a few days after I arrived by the leading Mando opposition, Tarro Blood, before the Hunt even began. Tarro died just like all the other competition. Despite his dirty, honourless tricks to stop me. I made that f***er bleed. Righteous revenge really is sweet.

I listen silently to her constant stream of crap. She doesn't need to know I couldn't give a f*** about Braden.

The travel across Dromund Kaas is long.

EverSteam's Avatar

09.26.2012 , 11:01 PM | #4
Dromund Kaas (still)


The cherry paint on my armour shines like wet blood in the lights of the stadium. It might actually be old blood with polish over the top... The Mandalorians stand at ceremony. An odd event. The stadium is large, set in the arena where I fought for a place in the Great Hunt. A place in history. Easy. I knew I could get here. But now that I am...

I sink in the moment. They are in straight lines. Parallel. Backs straight and chests out. Trees in an orchard. Along the path I walk to claim my glory. My footsteps echo. Loud and deafening. Their faces are shrouded in cold metal helmets. Identical trees.

All except one.

He has hair like golden threads. He is young. And gorgeous. His eyes are watchful and open. They follow my course while others look sightlessly to the ceiling. All at attention yet none aware. I nod to him. He bows his head. Something drops into my chest at that moment. Something old and familiar. Something terrifying. I feel fear.

I rasp my knuckles on the steel door.

'It's ready to talk.' The Guard on the other side opens the door for me. On the other side, the light is fluorescent. It makes the white, spotless walls shine brighter. I take the bottle he passes to me and scull it down as he contacts the General. 'How long till the General arrives?'

'Not for another hour or two, Ma'am.' With the General, that basically means immediately. He just doesn't want people to think that when they call, he comes running. *********** proud arse. Have to remember to wrench that conceited dignity from him before I kill him. I crush the steel bottle in my hand and sneer fiercely. Soon. Soon.

The Guard takes the empty, crushed bottle back with a shaking hand. I don't know this Guard. He's clearly new. He's in the Organisation armour; black cowl with eye slits and a durasteel cap with full body black armour. He has a blaster rifle and two small blaster pistols, plus two rockets in his wrist guards. A number is on left shoulder pad in silver: 579.

'You new? Where's Jakob?' Jakob's one of the three Guards for this cell who had the number 579.

The Guard looks uncomfortable. He's young. Far too young. Close to my age. Barely old enough to shave. 'He spoke out against orders, Ma'am. I'm his replacement.'

'What's your name kid?'

He stares at my implants. I only wear a black tank top with black leather pants. Not sure it could really pass as even a tank top; it's more a second, silk bra. General encourages me showing off the things on me with pride. Good at the showing but lacking on the pride. Loving the fear though. His petrified gaze makes me a aware of the blood that covers my body; spots of crimson I wear with conceit. I leer at him. I give him three weeks, max.
'Willis.' He stutters the word out; it is a fly that bangs against a window before finding the gap to freedom. 'Willis Gord.'

I laugh. 'Unfortunate name you got, kid. Sounds like you were destined for this bantha's arse.' I clap my hand on his shoulder. I hear the General's quick heels on the smooth white tiles. 'Keep your mouth shut, **** together and vomit in and you might last as long as dear old Jakob. An entire six months.'

I take my hand away and look mournfully into the distance. 'Was almost going to set a new record of twenty six weeks.' I leer at Willis out of the corner of my eye as what colour he had fades from his face.

The General appears and Willis moves to sharp attention. His legs almost stop wobbling. I stand at my own form of attention; back straight, legs shoulder length apart and hands behind my back. In my mind, I am spitting on his face.

'Guard.' Willis opens the door on the General's order and the smell of Wookie piss and **** hit's your nose like a speeder. The Guard does a good job keeping in the vomit that leaks from his mouth. He swallows hard. Again and again. When it is back where it should be, he wipes his mouth. The Guard glances at me and I wink. He's a quick learner. Might survive after all.

The General walks inside, examines my work, enquires to the Wookie of his cooperation, recievs a screeching affirmative and walks back out. He nods to me. 'Well done, Primacy. A new record for any successful torture in Class B. A little messy though.'

I turned and started walking away after 'well done'. When he finishes, my feet dance a 180 turn and I continue to walk away backward down the long, white corridor. I spread my arms wide as I take in his amused, affronted face.

'You trained me to be the best, General.' My feet turn back around. I walk away with a straight back and confident steps, my calling voice echoing down the corridor to him.

'So I'm being the best.'

I look to the Hunt Master. Old and grey; tall and majestic. He grins at me. Or something close to a grin, it's hard to tell with Wookies. Whatever it is, it isn't something Wookies have ever made while looking at me before. As he stares down at me from the podium in the centre of the dusty arena, I wallow in conceit and pride. This is my moment. The first mark in many leading to my eternal glory. A spit in the face of the Organisation.

'Your name will be feared by even Sith.'

But I feel his eyes. And I am still scared.

EverSteam's Avatar

09.27.2012 , 01:21 AM | #5
A week later after seeing Mandalore and returning to Dromund Kaas....

I let myself tell myself that I had forgotten him. But it's hard to forget someone you are consciously trying to forget. It was only a glance. Shouldn't be this hard to forget.

He wasn't on Mandalore's station.

So I was surprised to see him on Dromund Kaas.

Mandalorians stood talking around fires. He was not in traditional armour. Again. He was the first to see me. All stopped to ogle. His eyes never left me. I was conscious of them. Staring. He moves up around his friend. Better position to watch.

The space outside the yawning black cave is a vast clearing. Towering dark green trees attempt to meet in a canopy over the barren area, the sun still reaching down. Surprised this area is clear. Most of Drumond Kaas, a wild cess pit of carnivorous monsters that is the Imperial Capital, is untamed jungle of green and purple plants. Imperial buildings and estates are like birds' nests coddled and suffocated in trees.

Despite the warmth of this festering and light of the clearing, there are still fires in their camp. Sergeants walk along lines of bare chested Mando's doing drills. Sergeant's and loitering Mandalorians are all in traditional armour, but all have helmets off and are watching. As expected, there are no females in sight. No wonder Mandalorian's turn to adoption.

'This is a camp for warriors, not hikers. You are not welcome here.' I feel Mandalorians walking up and around us, their eyes watching Mako, Gault and I. Mako shifts uncomfortably and blushes under their gaze. Most had their arms crossed or on their hips. There posture is still casual. They just wanted to watch a show.

I sneer at blondies friend. 'I go where I want. Pick the fight with someone you can beat.' I go to walk away towards the cave. But the dumb ugly punk isn't finished.

'Leave. I am not telling you again. Or I will put a knife in your gut.'

'Tough words. Care to attempt to back them up.' He makes a move. More a flinch. I am faster. My gun is centimetres from his head before he even touches his own. 'Pow. Your dead.'

The Mandalorian stares at me with hatred in his eyes. I sneer wider. Mandalorians are pathetic.

Blondie steps forward slightly. I glance his way. His heart beat is even. Relaxed. His mouth is twitching at the edges; a tiny smile in the corners. He seems serious. He is strong. Leaner than most Mandalorians. A scar like tridents of old is on each cheek. I like the look of him.

'She's more warrior than you, Jogo.' He tries not to smile, but I can tell he is under the shadow of a frown. He is smart. Yes. I think I like the look of him a lot. And that is a dangerous, terrifying thing.

This 'Jogo' is offended. Slightly humiliated. I don't know why, but he is easy to read. He leers at the kid. 'You're one to judge, huh, arue'tal?' A traitor's blood. Interesting.

The kid ignores the jibe, keeps cool. Very smart. 'Huntmaster declared her Grand Champion.' I smirk a little. He remembers. Something spasms in my chest. I ignore it.

His 'friend' is dismissive. Derisive. It's big talking for someone with a gun in their face. But it doesn't earn my respect, only my spite. I think about shooting him. But it would prove troublesome. His friends voice is dumb. I can tell he is an idiot. Good thing Mandalorians pride combat over brains. The others all stiffen a little.

Blondie shakes his head and turns his back to Jogo. It shakes his hair. I turn to him. But I don't lower my arm.
'Never mind. It's an honour.'

I smirk a little. Honour is a funny thing. I don't believe in it. 'Your friend has a death wish. Thinking about making good on it.'

Blondies lips twitch some more. I want him to smile. 'Yeah. Ignore him. He's not too bright.' I smile. Not smirk. Something passes between us. It is startling. I want more than this moment. And that is even more terrifying. I must kill whatever this kid has caused in me. It has no place in someone like me. Something like me.

I lower my arm from his friends face. 'So you got a name, kid?' He frowns. No twitching. Kids got pride. Despite his status.

'Torian Cadera. Not a kid.' I smirk.

But I nod too. 'You're still young, kid. But I'm sorry. Meant no offence.'

'Older than you.' I let it slide. Years have no meaning over me. I am hundreds of years old. 'But no insult taken.' Yes. I removed the moment. And a lot more. But he stills speaks. 'Taking the head of one of our beasts?'

'Something like that. I will know it when I see it.' Don't know why I'm still talking to him. I'm wasting time. Time is everything. Especially when there's an expiry date.

'Sire of the brood.' He's heard of it. 'You can feel it's heart beat in the walls.' I stop and listen. Yes. I can hear a heartbeat. Large above all others. It will be deafening in the fight. I hold back a sigh. Hearing implants can be a pain.

'Better warriors than you have tried. They never return.' I smirk at Jogo's retreating figure. No Mandalorian is a better warrior then me. No one is.

And I always return.

EverSteam's Avatar

09.27.2012 , 03:32 AM | #6
An hour or two later...

Mandalorians cheer as I walk past out of the cave. I like victories.

The light of day is blinding after the liberating dark of the festering cave. Gault didn't like the cave so much. Neither did Mako. She gizka-d out and stayed behind, hidden from the sight of the Mando's outside. Once she was out of ear shot Gault was quick to jump down my throat and force himself under my skin. Think it was the only reason he stuck with me for the fight.

He nudges my ribs playfully and grins in his mocking way. 'You got a thing for the blonde one, don't you?'

Before Gault can process what's happening, his arms are behind his back and his kneeling on the ground, my lips at his ear. 'Want to say that again? Didn't quite catch it.'

'Hey hey. No need for the hostilities. Want to get close to me only have to call my name.' I snort and push him into the ground as I let go and stand up. I keep walking through the cave toward the vociferous noise. Gault stumbles after me. I knew he would.

'So come on. You do, don't you? I saw you two looking at each other. I was born very, very far away from yesterday. If he had been looking at you with anything hotter, Drumond Kaas would be the new Tatooine. So come on. Stop being so silent. Talk to Uncle Gault about it.'

I stop and let Gault run into me. I hold my gun under his chin and look into his eyes. 'If Uncle Gault wants to live, I suggest he shut the **** up now while he still has a jaw. The beast is in the next cavern.'

I move to the wall and walk along it noiselessly. Gault comes up beside me and I whisper the plan as I eye the beast. 'Right behind you. Far, far behind you,' he whispers back.

'No different from usual then.' He begins to sneak to the other side of the cavern, far from the action when he stops on my whisper.

'And Gault: nudge me, touch me, hit me, kick me or poke me again and you will lose all eleven fingers. Say anything like that again and you will find yourself missing three horns and one of them won't be growing back. Do I make myself clear, 'Uncle' Gault?'

He nods and grumbles curses and abuse under breath when he thinks I can't hear. I can. But they amuse me for now. When he is in position, we attack the beast.


Cadera is the first to see us. 'She's back.' The words seem to burst out. His voice has excitement and pleasure. The others turn, slightly startled. 'How'd it go?' Slightly more cool. I wink at the kid. I pretend it doesn't pull my chest. It's easier to pretend.

'Find another hunting spot. I just made this one a bone yard.' I am proud and arrogant. A small task really. I pretend my ears did not bleed and my body didn't strain under its attack. It's easier pretending.

His friend is outraged. It makes sparing him worth it. I am amazing. And the day will come when the galaxy knows it. 'How did you kill it when so many of my clan have failed?'

I don't reply. I spit at his feet. A practiced and precise move. I smirk. Constant underestimation.

Cadera leads the others into a cheer. 'Hail to the victor! Oya!'

I just walk away.

Earthmama's Avatar

09.27.2012 , 08:06 AM | #7
Just wanted to say that this is so deliciously dark. I look forward to more.

EverSteam's Avatar

09.27.2012 , 06:20 PM | #8
Thank you!
Was kind of wondering what people were thinking since I was seeing views and no comments....

EverSteam's Avatar

09.27.2012 , 06:37 PM | #9

He wasn't on Mandalore's ship, of course. Don't think a traitor's son would be welcome there.

Mandalore makes an offer for me to join his clan when he sees the evidence of my victory against the beast. I accept. I don't care for being part of a large family or their pathetic honour. I join because I know there will be benefits: money and connections. Important connections.

And the coronation ceremony and celebration is almost fun. Meet the other three Grand Champion's of Hunt's past. I don't care for them. Especially the Zabrak woman, Jewl'a Nightbringer. Bloodworthy and the droid seemed tolerable for now. Not sure I like Mandalore though. Even though he 'likes a woman who isn't afraid to get her knuckles bloody.' Think that comment is basically why I don't. I'm not here to be liked. But I am smarter than to refuse. Might need allies for awhile in the galaxy and they could cause trouble otherwise. Plus. Pay is good. Very good.

When I make it back to the ship, Mako and Gault are still awake. I'm in a surprisingly good mood. Basically means I don't have the urge to shoot anyone. Not even Mako.

'Ah, thank goodness your back. I was getting lonely for female companionship.'

Mako glares at him. 'Two things, Gault: Ew, just ew. And hey! I'm female.'

Gault gives her a once over and shakes his head. He grins at me and spreads his hands wide. 'I rest my case.'

I laugh and sit on the floor. We make a strange triangle. Should probably buy couches or chairs one day. Got more than enough money. But such comforts don't mean much to me. This freedom is enough.

Mako is eager to hear the news, though. 'So, come on, what happened? What was Mandalore like?'

'He was an oppressive jack ***.' I shrug. 'Just like any man.' Mako giggles a little and it makes me notice the empty bottles for the first time. I look back at her and wonder how I didn't realise the disarray of her short brown hair, the unbalanced movements of her slim body and the general stench of the room.

Gault makes a short protest to my statement. I wave him away. 'You're existence only proves my point, 'Gault'. Anyway, I've become part of his clan. You are now looking at an official Mandalorian.'

Gault whistles. 'You've just made yourself a lot of friends.'

I grin at him. 'I know, Gault. They were my thoughts exactly. We also got a new job along with it. A Black List bounty. Big leagues.'

'And big credits.' Gault's greed is almost palpable. Don't think Gault is much different from his old name of Tyresius Lokai. Maybe a little more real. Definitely not as big a fish. Gault was a target and I spared him. He works for me now. We gave them a clone instead. Still think about killing him though. Suppose for now he's useful. But there's always tomorrow...

I nod. 'I'll toast to that.' He throws me an unopened bottle and we raise them at each other. Mako just shakes her head a little, but it turns into a drunken sway. I raise my eyebrow at Gault and motion to her. Light weight, I mouth to him. He snickers and nods.

'Wow. Black list bounty. Big leagues doesn't even cover it. You have no idea what this is.'

I glare at her. I hate her presumption of what I do and don't know. She stiffens in fear. 'Let me guess, Mako. You've searched the holo net a thousand times and all you could ever find or hear of about the list were rumours. Trust me, Mako. There's a lot out there you don't know.'

She goes to make a retort but something in my voice or words stops her. She gives me a curious searching look and nods. 'I'll get to work on decoding it. Night.' She reels away drunkenly. I hear her pass out on her bed.

I stay up with Gault. We talk of all the credits that are coming our way. I don't care for credits like Gault does. They are a necessary means to an end.

And that end is revenge.

EverSteam's Avatar

09.27.2012 , 10:36 PM | #10
A few weeks later on Taris.


We run towards him.

I dodge the traps easily. Leaping and twisting. Mako and Gault have more trouble. I don't look back. My blood is surging through me fast. It's from the battle. Don't worry. 'Torian!' Mako calls as she limps up to stand with me. Her voice is thick with emotion. Think more on that later. I am aware of Gault running from one trap to the next. Disabling them with ease. He is skilled and efficient. It almost makes me smile a little. You would never guess.

'Cadera'. I'm all business. 'Where's Jicoln?' My voice is urgent. I feel tense. It's because the trail is getting cold. Only the trail.

Cadera is lying down on his side, his elbow supporting him as it rests in a pool of blood. There sweat beading on his forehead and he holds one hand to his side. His hair is ruffled, damp threads of gold, pushed back and out of place. His face is serious but does a good job at remaining stoic. His voice doesn't.

I order Mako to get some med supplies. I take out what I have on me and silently attend Cadera as he continues his briefing. He gives me directions. Jicoln escaped Torian's traps but is badly injured. Should be a blood trail to lead us to him. He'll head for an outpost for supplies. Mako joins me. She silently passes the supplies she managed to find. I still feel tense. Metal is tight and heavy on my skin. He continues to protest. 'Better the trail gets cold then you.' That's a first.

He tries to look in my eye. I avoid them. I retain my professional indifference. It's easier pretending. I see a twitch on his face. A small smile. My own lips tug. I force a frown and finish cleaning his wounds. I need to be harder to read then that. The wounds were not that bad. Fatal if not treated immediately and carefully. But I had seen worse on my home world during the Great Galactic War. And I have done worse.

'So close...' he mumbles. I become aware of how close our faces are. Our bodies. He means Jicoln. Jicoln. He passes out at some stage.

We leave when he wakes. 'All right, kid, the kolto's treated most of the damage. So stop sleeping.'

He's angry. 'You should have left me. You've given the traitor too much time.' Half an hour has passed by. I don't mind. I never fail a kill. I always get my target. And I'm relieved. Gault and Mako return to the ship. They need to collect on a few rewards, and buy a few things before the job is wrapped up.

Cadera and I fight along a trail of blood.

After a few minutes I decide to speak up. I like the silence but we can't never speak. 'You're welcome for back there, by the way.' I shoot a rakghoul that was stalking up behind him. He finishes off the two in front of him. There's none left in this area.

'Sorry. Thanks.' His serious face looks a little ashamed. I hide my smile under a sneer.

'Come on. Can't keep standing smelling the flowers all day.' I motion to a beautiful purple flower on the ground.

Similar to the lilies found on Drumond Kaas. I walk off and pick it up, putting it behind my ear. It smells nice. Make a nice memento. I hear him following me.

He fights well. Like a man with something to prove. We all have something to prove. We are in sync. So quickly we fit our fighting styles; defence and offence. We leap in time, fighting side by side. He ducks and twirls, keeping the enemies back towards me. It's exhilarating. Our fights are easy, swift and enjoyable.

He fights with honour. Unlike Gault, he relies on guile instead of skill to win battles. Or Mako. Unlike any man. A bond was formed between us. When two people fight as one, it does something. An unseen honour. An unspoken respect. And something more. No. Never more.

My chest is hurting. A virus is spreading in my torso and through my body.

I fight harder. Because that's easier.