The Well of Undying http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=532619

The Foundation of All Desire http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=769205

Spy Vs. Spy http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=858581

Marr http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=879214

The Sanctuary of Regret http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=930369

NOTE: PLEASE DO NOT REPOST OR LINK MY STORIES TO OTHER SITES. Thank you.

Notes and Disclaimers: Sort of a sequel to The Foundation of All Desire, but focussing on my agents and the SWTOR spy world. ‘Spy Vs. Spy’ takes place in the unknown years before KotFE. All the usual disclaimers apply and as always my thanks to Star Wars and Bioware/EA for letting me play with their Barbies in their sandbox. Some spoilers for Imperial Agent stories. Hope you enjoy. 

Cipher One strode past the twelve, or as he called them, ‘the jury’. Silent, unmoving and identical, they were created in their Master’s image and served as his Grey Council.

The jury wasn’t really a council—that would imply they had minds of their own and opinions to share. In truth, the greys were a shadow of what once was, and their only verdict was agreement.

One scowled. Mindless automatons.

Darth Jadus stood on the dais at the far end of the conference room aboard the dreadnaught Apocrypha.

“Lord Jadus you wished to see me…” His tone carried a hint of gravelly warmth, despite it’s blasé timbre and his question was more of an observation.

“I have been patient these last months, agent. I trust the subject has acclimated and is primed for induction?”

“I believe so. You know I have a preference for what I call old school methods. Chemical solutions, while initially promising, were shown to be inadequate, as you’ll remember in the case of Cipher Nine. My methods require time and precision, but in the long run, I’ve little doubt you’ll be pleased with the result. I have a few minor details that require my attention, but final testing is set for tomorrow. Would you care to observe, Lord Jadus?”

“I leave it to you agent, but know this,” Jadus wagged his index finger in warning, “If he fails the simulation again, I will have no choice but to terminate the subject, and the trust I place in your methods and ultimately in you, will be re-examined.”

“Of course, my lord, but rest assured your trust has always been my primary motivation. I won’t fail you.”

“See that you don’t. I am the embodiment of destiny, and you, as my chosen, are the extension of my will and that is not a gift to be taken lightly, agent. The time has come to effectuate my vision of a bold new Empire, second to none. Deliver my enemies to me. Succeed and your authority will only be exceeded by my own. Failure is not an option.”

“He won’t fail.” One’s lip crept up at the corner and his smile curved like a scythe.

One returned to his quarters and froze in the doorway. Candles covered every flat surface, their golden glow throwing undulating shadows on the walls.

The scent of Alderaanian nectar hung in the air and a bottle of fine Daruvvian champagne sat propped in a silver ice bucket. A round table for two, decorated with ivory roses and fine plates and cutlery graced the corner. Domed entrees awaited his appetite and fragrant rose petals blanketed the bed like snow. The myriad scents competed with each other as if someone was trying too hard to please.

He chuckled, “What’s all this?”

“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten!” Raina emerged from behind the decorative screen in the corner, clad in expensive Corellian lingerie.

“Well, it’s not my birthday…and it certainly isn’t yours…I’ll go out on a limb…could it be our anniversary?”

“You’re such an awful tease. You knew all along.”

One closed the distance between them and drew her into his arms. “Of course I did.”

“I know you’re busy…how was work today?” Raina gushed.

“You know my motto…no day without progress. But let’s not talk about that…I have a gift for you…right pocket”

Raina dipped into his suitcoat and withdrew a keycard. She eyed it quizzically, “What’s this?”

“Wrong pocket. Your other right.” He slipped the card from between her fingers and tossed it aside on the nightstand, “Just my clearance, nothing to concern yourself with.”

“All right…” She plucked a flat rectangular box from his pocket and beamed. “Can I open it?”

“I would hope so.”

“You’re awful!”

“So I’m told—almost daily,” One deadpanned.

Raina waved him off playfully and tugged apart the white ribbon to open the gift. She gasped at the contents. “It’s beautiful…put it on me?”

“Of course darling.” He plucked the fine platenite chain from the satiny folds and slipped it about her throat, until the pendant dangled above the cleft between her breasts. She turned the blue-green krayt dragon pearl between her fingertips and smiled. “I’ll always treasure it.”

She spun about and locked her wrists at the nape of his neck to draw him close. He lingered at her cheek, breathing in the floral perfume she wore, the scent nearly luring him into a trance. He pressed his lips over hers to sample the sweetness he usually tasted there, and urged her backwards toward their bed.

“What about dinner and the champagne?” She murmured.

“It’ll wait…you know I’m more of a dessert first sort…” He claimed her lips again, stripping out of his suitcoat and shirt without breaking the kiss.

Her fingers travelled over his pale toned chest and powerful arms. He loomed over her, easing her onto the field of rose petals she’d strewn about. He smelled of fresh cut cedar and Raina breathed in the scent until she thought she’d get high on it.

The keycard glinted on the nightstand in the candlelight and she closed her eyes.

One trapped her beneath him and with urgent hands he flayed the lingerie from her body.

*****

Balkar strolled into the Slippery Slopes Cantina with a pair of adoring blue-skinned Twi’lek showgirls clinging to him. They fluttered their false lashes and fawned over him with almost single-minded devotion.

He scanned the lounge, his attention finally fixing on a darkened corner, highlighted by a mop of golden hair he recognized.

Lana lifted her chin in subtle acknowledgement as he drifted toward the table. “I had hoped we’d have our privacy.” She eyed the showgirls with icy disdain and stood.

Balkar chuckled, “And we will. Just one moment.” He favoured each girl with a wanting look and kissed them in turn, his fingertips strumming against the exposed flesh above their hips. Subtly he pressed a fifty credit note in each girl’s hand, and his gaze followed them longingly as they sashayed toward the bar.

“Was that really necessary?” Lana muttered.

“Maybe. You stood me up the last time. Bliss and Jewel were my back up plan in case you did it again.” Balkar held her chair as she sat, and then slid in across from her.

Lana rolled her eyes.

He’d secretly hoped she’d dress up for their meeting, but as usual she wore the dignified deep olive toned business attire she seemed to prefer.

“Apologies, it couldn’t be helped. Korriban was under attack. I meant to com you, but it was madness. Thousands died. Much of the academy was reduced to rubble.”

“And what about Theron?” He blurted.

“I promise you, given the choice I would have preferred to meet you. Seeing Korriban levelled in a day, only months after we’d finally managed to restore it—”

Balkar held up his hands. “Okay, okay. Let’s just get down to business. That seems to be what you want.”

Lana’s brow peaked. The glint in her eye suggested she wanted to argue his insinuation, but thought better of it. “It is. Now let’s get on with it.”

“A’right. First things first. Who was that guy?”

The server set a cup of caf before each of them and left promptly.

“I took the liberty of ordering…”

“Cantina caf? You’re braver than I thought,” Balkar muttered and took a sip.

“As I was about to say Agent Balkar, the man who abducted Theron is known to Sith Intelligence as Cipher One…a counterpart to Cipher Nine. He was also known as The Hand of Jadus. I believe the SIS referred to them as Alpha and Omega. And Nine was also known as Legate while she worked under Arden Kothe.”

“Legate was Cipher Nine? I’ll be damned.”

“Anyhow, up until that security capture you sent me, I’d believed One was dead.”

Balkar narrowed his eyes, “Is it me or…wait a minute…you had something going on with that guy…didn’t you?” He leaned over his cup of caf and grinned devilishly.

Lana averted her gaze and pursed her lips. “In the interest of full disclosure…yes, but that was a long time ago. I was fresh out of the academy, long before Darth Arkous hired me on as his advisor.”

“Sounds like there’s something still there…am I wrong?”

“Will you focus please?”

“You could say I have a sixth sense about these things,” Balkar shrugged. “So why’d you think he was dead?”

“He was aboard the Dominator with Darth Jadus…One said he was a part of his grand vision…as was Cipher Nine.

“Then why wasn’t she with them?”

“Jadus needed her to give validity to his disappearance. He knew she would search the ends of the galaxy to bring justice to the terror cell that caused his death.”

“Was there something between them?”

Lana sat back and shook her head appalled. “Why is that always the first thing you think of?”

“It just sounded to me like he mattered to her.”

“He did, as her better.”

“You know I really hate it when you Sith say that.”

“Fine. Apologies, I meant in a working capacity. He was her…superior…her employer, if you will.”

“You still didn’t answer my question.”

“Do I believe there was something between Jadus and Nine?” Lana shook her head. “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

“Tell me more about Nine.”

“She works with us from time to time…she’s a ghost. Nearly impossible to track down…Darth Marr had the means…but regrettably we’ve lost him.”

“Lost him…Darth Marr is dead? What about Liatrix? She’s still alive, right? Right?” Balkar pressed.

Lana shook her head. “It’s unlikely. She was with Darth Marr aboard the Erinyes. I sensed his passing. Near as we can determine, they rammed the Erinyes into an enemy craft. Their bodies haven’t been recovered—we’re investigating but we’re not optimistic. I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news. I know you and Theron cared about her deeply.”

“Theron thinks she died on Dromund Kaas. What about Scourge? And Lia’s children?”

“We found him adrift in his personal craft. His condition…well suffice it to say, it could be some time before we have any solid answers.” She stared down into her cup, “As for the younglings, they remain in the care of Darth Marr’s staff, until such time as Lord Scourge can resume his role as father and guardian.”

Balkar looked away. He forced his attention to a dancer gyrating about a pole at the next table. He kept his gaze locked on the lithe Nautolan’s moves until they became a blur. “Do you think Nine would be in on this?”

Lana shook her head. “I don’t think so. Nine,” she hesitated, “is in my opinion, a soft heart. Her methods are unusual for those in our field. I find it rather astonishing that she’s still alive, or that she was accepted into Intelligence in the first place, but owning the galaxy’s secrets…well, I suppose that serves as a potent insurance policy. She’s not the sort to misuse them. That and her companions, while an eclectic band, are rather formidable in their own right and they are loyal to her alone.”

“So...what happened to Jadus?”

“Nine outmanoeuvered him. She exposed his plan…millions were saved…but he’s still out there. I have the dossier here…if you wish to acquaint yourself with the events that followed. Needless to say, it’s against our security protocols, but if we are to work together, we must learn to trust one another.” Lana reached into her case and slipped the disc across the table.

Balkar dropped it into his inside breast pocket. “We’re no closer to finding Theron than we were before. I don’t suppose you have anything in that file about One. We need more about him…like where to find him.”

“I realize that.” Lana cocked her head, noting that he hadn’t made eye contact in at least ten minutes. “Are you all right?”

“What the hell do you think? Everyone I care about is dead or missing…probably dead,” he snarled.

Lana shirked back into her chair and blinked. Her lips parted as if she were about to speak but nothing came out.

“Kark…” He hissed and ran his hand through his hair. “I’m sorry—you didn’t deserve that.” He shook his head, “I haven’t been sleeping…it’s making me short.”

“Don’t misunderstand, I’m not unsympathetic Agent Balkar,” she began, “But I must admit I’m not the most adept at communicating emotion…it’s difficult for me.”

“That’s the most human thing I’ve ever heard you say,” Balkar murmured. “And please…call me Jonas. The last thing I want right now is to be formal…”

Lana smiled apologetically, “And formality is all I know…but given the circumstances, I will try.”

Balkar sat hunched over his caf for a long time. “I appreciate that…” He drew a deep breath and met her eyes. “We need a plan.”

“Agreed. With so little to go on, I think the only one who could help, is Nine.”

“But how do we find her?”

“If I had the answer to that question, matters would be far less complex.” Lana straightened and fell silent. Her gaze shifted between the entrance and exit, to the kitchen and restrooms. Men and women clad in dark garments flooded the lounge. “Jonas…we’d best be going now,” she whispered.

“Aw hell…” His gaze shot towards the ramp leading to the second floor lifts. “This way…C’mon.” He clasped her hand and drew her toward the crowded dance floor.

*****

Raina watched her husband sleep. His breathing was deep and slow, and even in the dim light, she could see his eyelids quiver with REM sleep. She pushed herself to the edge of the mattress, deliberately, carefully, to avoid jostling the bed.

She winced as she rose, her inner thighs tight and achy. She felt where he’d been with every step she took. After she dressed, she swiped his clearance from the nightstand.

She held her breath when the door hissed open to the bright hall outside their quarters. When he didn’t stir, she backed away from the entrance and started for the lab.

Thick dark glass separated the lab from the confinement cell. She peered through the glass and watched the test subject. She recognized the man as one of the SIS’s best field agents. While she’d never met him personally during her brief stint on Yavin 4, she knew his reputation.

He sat in the center of the bright room. He held his head between his hands, with his elbows planted over his knees.

“Best not take any chances…” She took the only remaining pistol in the locker and stowed it under her belt.

She slipped the access card into the reader. The doorlock clicked and slid open just enough to allow her entry.

The agent lifted his head and blood shot eyes stared at her. “Don’t come any closer. I mean it.” His voice and hands shook.

“Agent, I’m not here to hurt you, I promise.” She crept closer, and extended her hand. “My name is Raina. I want to help you.”

“I know what you want.” He shook his head incredulously. “Stay away.” His gaze strayed from her face to the pistol tucked under her belt.

“It’s all right, I won’t hurt you. Your name is Theron, isn’t it?”

His gaze shifted, and then he nodded slowly. Beads of sweat dotted his brow.

“Look, I was afraid you’d hurt me, that’s why I brought this with me. But look, I’m going to put it down. You’re safe.”

She drew the weapon from under her belt and set it on the table.

“No…I’m not safe. Neither are you. Go away, I’m begging you.”

“Listen to my voice Theron. I’m here to help you, but I must tell you something first.”

“What?”

“Whatever they’ve said, or done, you need to know that Nine is not the enemy. You mustn’t hurt her. Do you understand?” Raina waved her hand before him.

“You lie.”

“No Theron it’s the truth. Let me help you.”

“I don’t want your help. Get away from me.”

“You need help…I was sent to watch Darth Jadus, but this is wrong…keeping you here like this.”

“You’re a liar.” He dove for the pistol and turned it on her. “Get out of here, while you still can.”

“You won’t hurt me. And you mustn’t hurt Cipher Nine.” She passed her hand between them again.

“That Jedi trick isn’t going to work on me. You’re one of hers…”

“No…I promise Theron, I’m her friend and I want to be yours too.” She took a few steps closer and smiled.

“You have kind eyes…” His breathing quickened, “But it’s all a trick. That’s what this is…you’re not even real. Not real.”

“Give me the pistol Theron. You won’t hurt me.”

“I can’t…” His hands shook. He turned the pistol on himself, notching the end of the barrel against his temple.

“Please, put it down. You don’t want to do that.”

“No…you’re right. I don’t.” He lowered the pistol.

“That’s good. It’s the right thing to do.” Raina took another step closer.

“No…but this is.” He trained the pistol on her and pulled the trigger. The air between them shattered with a deafening zing and scarlet sparks.

Raina stood before him, her gaze dumbfounded. Blood trickled down her forehead between her eyes and over her nose. She collapsed and stared up at him, her eyes wide as if death hadn’t registered yet.

Theron lowered the weapon and cocked his head. “You’re still there…” He knelt beside her and dabbed at the dark puddle spreading under her head and shoulders. “You’re still there…you were supposed to vanish,” he muttered under his breath, still staring at the wetness staining his fingertips. He pointed the pistol at his head and pulled back the trigger several times in fast succession, but nothing happened. He hurled the pistol across the room.

The door to the lab slid open and One strode in. “You see? I told you, you’d know what to do when the time was right.”

“She’s still here…why?”

“Because this time…she was real.”

Theron shook his head, “No…no, I didn’t just kill her.”

“Oh yes…how else do you explain the blood?”

“Who was she?”

“No one important. Just my wife.”

Theron stared at the pretty young woman at his feet.

One slapped Theron’s shoulder, “Don’t fret my friend. She was a problem. And that’s what we do, we solve problems. Come—join me for tea…Corellian breakfast…your favorite.” He urged Theron out of the confinement unit and led him to the office adjacent to the lab. “Tea always makes you feel better.”

“Didn’t you love her?” Theron murmured.

“Hard to love someone whose been playing you from the off. Oh look…biscuits,” One pushed the plate toward Theron. “Go on…take one, and lets discuss the future.” One tipped the aurodium trimmed tea pot and filled a cup for each of them. “I prefer mine clear…you?”

Theron eyed the biscuit warily and then took it, as if expecting it to bite.

“You’re one of us now. Revel in it. That was inoculation.”

“I don’t understand…why?”

“Simple. Because of you, I lost someone very dear to me.”

Theron stared at the blood tainted biscuit in his hand.

“You really don’t understand do you?” One brought the tea cup to his lips with tapered long fingered hands. He blew at the steam and watched Theron through his opaque rectangular cybernetic spectacles.

Theron shook his head, but as he did he caught a glimpse of One’s pale ice blue eyes from behind the specs.

“Two years ago you cornered a woman…your government took her into custody. Your people questioned her…but she was in no condition to answer. It seems they were too stupid to realize she was damaged—they chalked it up to Imperial conditioning. She was no threat to you or the SIS. Come to think of it, she was no threat to anyone. She was brilliant once…until my associates systematically destroyed her mind. It’s an injustice that simply can’t be allowed to stand unanswered…so this is your due reward. Understand now?”

Theron nodded.

“Good. Now drink your tea. Few things are more foul than cold tea.”

((To be continued…))

Oh wow....what a start!

Thanks I'm glad you liked it! Starting is always a bit nerve-wracking.

Aaaaand subscribed. I have a deadly weakness for Imperial spies of all stripes.

Happy to have you with me I love the spies too, they're a lot of fun. SIS, Imperials, yum.

all I have to say is: Cipher one is cold as Hoth.

He is a lovely one isn't he. Brrrr!

Balkar tugged Lana behind him as he wove through the crowd of gyrating bodies on the dance floor. “S’cuse us, pardon us…comin’ through.”

“So sorry…apologies,” Lana called over her shoulder.

The glitterball hovering high above them spat speckles of blinding white purple light in all directions and the music booming from the speakers on the stage made Balkar feel like it was throwing off his heartbeat.

A pair of Gamorrean bouncers wielding spiked clubs, thundered down the stairs leading to the lifts. Balkar swore and searched for an opening. “There…the stage.”

“Are you mad?” Lana protested.

“D’you see another way?” Balkar hurtled toward the stage. “Jump!” He leapt onto the stage, half amazed that Lana landed gracefully beside him. “Have to say it, I’m impressed,” Balkar grinned. “This way.”

The five man Duros band swayed out of the way without missing a beat. The kloo player tore into a fantastic riff and slid across the stage clutching the instrument to his belly as he groped the squeal out of it.

A Twi’lek dancer clad entirely in black mesh writhed to the rhythm and Balkar screeched to a stop to admire her. “Has anyone told you how gorgeous you are? Hi, I’m Jonas…” He thrust his hand at the amused dancer, but before she could accept it, Balkar felt himself being dragged back stage. “Wha—?”

“You are insane! We have no time to socialize,” Lana hissed.

“Hey, just bein’ friendly.”

“Too friendly,” Lana snapped.

Balkar sing-songed, “Someone is jealous.” His gaze darted high and low as he searched for an out. He barely heard Lana growl in protest.

“There!” He dragged her toward a dangling rope, half amazed she hadn’t let go of him by now.

He twined the rope about his leg and gripped it tight with one hand. “Hold onto me,” he barked as he pulled out his pistol.

Lana swore under her breath and when he felt her arms around him, he shot a pair of rounds at the knot that anchored the lighting array. As it crashed down, they shot upwards to the catwalk.

“Are you done playing the hero yet?” Lana huffed.

“Why? Did you want a turn?” Balkar teased, as he planted her onto the narrow walkway.

“I swear you think this is funny. It isn’t, I assure you.”

“Is being grouchy gonna make it hurt less, if they catch us?”

Lana averted her gaze, “No—but…”

“There you go. C’mon. We need to get to the roof.”

“Why do people always run up when they’re in danger? There’s no where to go…”

“Conventional thinking.”

“Sane thinking, you mean,” Lana hissed.

Balkar ignored her gripe and kicked the service door to the roof open. The wind rushed around him, fluttering his clothes and sending shivers up his spine. Nar Shaddaa’s air was warm, stale and heavy with exhaust fumes. “Helluva view from up here.” He stalked out onto the service deck, seemingly marvelling at the bright colourful lights.

Lana followed, practically on his heels. “Bit garish for my liking.”

“You just can’t appreciate the beauty in anything can you.” He peered over the edge and watched the taxis below, docking on the upper promenade.

“Now what?” Lana glanced down at the decks leading to the upper and lower public levels. “We’ve no where to go…” The wind pulled her hair, its wispy fine strands like spider silk across her face.

The door to the roof swung open and a legion of dark cloaked figures emerged. “Get them! Don’t let them get away!”

“They’re upon us!” Lana hissed and was about to reach for her lightsaber.

Balkar scowled when an idea struck him. “Do you trust me?” He thrust his hand at her.

“Do I have a choice?”

“Well, you could take your chances with the darkness brigade…”

“I think not.” She clasped his hand and yelped as he tugged her over the edge to free fall through Nar Shadaa’s hyperlanes. The air rushed around them and Lana tightened her grip on Balkar’s hand.

Lines of speeders swerved and honked to miss them. The wind tugged at their skin and a rapid string of profanity reached Balkar’s ears. He laughed as he fell, and then he caught sight of what he was hoping for, and not a moment too soon.

We’re going to die, Lana thought. She expected visions of family and moments of regret as they plummeted. A multi-coloured flashing ark loomed below. Shards of pink and green light cut through the pollution from under the canopy of the party barge. The driving rhythm of the hit band, Eloo and the Stinky 7 curled around them.

“Music to die for!” Balkar shouted.

“What?! No!”

“Doncha like top forty?”

“How can you joke?” Lana squeezed her eyes shut before impact. She shrieked as they bounced across the canvas, and as if matters couldn’t get any worse, she lost her hold on Balkar. She scrambled for a hold, but anything she reached for slipped out of reach.

Balkar tumbled and pounced on her before she shot over the edge. “Gotcha! You don’t get away from me that easy…”

She glared up at him breathlessly, “You idiot! We could’ve been killed!”

Balkar hovered over her and smirked. “But we weren’t. Hey is that your lightsaber…”

“Well it certainly isn’t yours!”

His eyebrow twitched, “It could be if you were a little nicer.”

“Get off me,” Lana warned.

“You sure you want me to do that? We’re pretty high up.”

“Get off! We can’t stay like this.”

“Why? Are you as turned on as I am?”

“No!” Lana’s cheeks flushed as red as Coruscanti blood roses. “We need to get out of sight.”

“Hold tight. Just a couple more blocks and we’ll be fine, you’ll see.”

“I hate you Agent Balkar.”

“Damn…and just when I thought you were warming up to me.” He snapped his fingers in mock defeat.

*****

One clasped Theron’s shoulders and turned him to face the mirror. “That’s much better, don’t you think?”

Theron’s gaze ran the length of the reflection before him, but what he saw there wasn’t him. His face was his own, so was his posture, but the expensive custom suit, complete with thin leather gloves could’ve belonged to a politician or a Sith, or an assassin. “It’s not me.”

“Of course it is…it’s just a part of you, you haven’t acknowledged yet. It’s always a bit surreal when you come face to face with your ultimate potential.” One fussed with Theron’s lapel and affixed an elegant aurodium pin, and then moved on to adjust the shimmersilk pocket square to the left of his heart.

“Surreal…yeah that works,” Theron muttered.

“Enough with the scraps from the SIS. Haven’t you wondered what it might be like having the best of everything for once in your life? Come, come, now—be honest.”

“I suppose…who hasn’t?”

“Now we’re getting somewhere. You know working with me isn’t so different than your previous post…I suppose the most vibrant difference would be that I’m going to allow you the freedom the SIS and the Jedi never did. They never understood what it takes for men like us to get the job done. You remember the time you were censured for investigating the climate on Ziost?”

“You know about that?”

“Of course I do. You should have been promoted and praised not scolded like an untrained akk dog. Were it not for you, both the Republic and Empire would have been lost. And yet that woman had the audacity to reprimand you for using her precious Jedi to get to the truth…”

“She was my mother…”

“Was she really? Ask yourself, what did she ever do for you since bringing you screaming into a war torn galaxy? Did she acknowledge you? Love you, clothe you? Feed you?”

“No…”

One nodded sympathetically. “No. Instead she gave you away. You didn’t matter to her. Nor did you matter to her Jedi. They all thought themselves above you. What did they do when they learned you had no power? They cast you out—sent you to that hall of lessers,” he snorted. “The SIS—where the Jedi send their rejects and problems. You’ve been cast aside your entire life. There has always been something or someone more than you. But no longer.” One clasped Theron’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “You’ll come to see that working with me, is the best thing that could’ve happened to you.”

Theron frowned. “But you said that I was the one who arrested your…”

“Shara yes,” One nodded. “You arrested her by order of the SIS. And that is why you’re here now.”

“I don’t understand…”

“Cipher Nine and our old Keeper destroyed Shara’s mind. She was bred and conditioned for loyalty and they turned her into a renegade. She wasn’t made for that. You were a renegade…but the balance has been restored now.” He leaned in close to whisper, “Now, you’re loyal to me. I do hope for your sake, you’ll abide by the training I’ve given you. There’s something I wish to show you…come with me.”

“All right…” Theron followed One to the display monitor.

“This is Shara…” One tapped the access code to the feed. “Our old Keeper and Nine decided she should have deconditioning…to live a normal life away from the Empire. Even if it had worked, it would have been torture for her. Imagine turning one of our foremost minds into an average one…suffice it to say, it would be hell.”

Theron leaned in closer to watch the feed at the asylum. “She’s not moving.”

“No, of course not, she’s paralysed. The surgery…failed. All her hair gone—eyes vacant now. She doesn’t even know me anymore. Is that any way to live?”

“Why don’t they…” Theron took a breath, “Why don’t they euthanize her if there is no hope?”

“She’s no longer a citizen of the Empire…well, not our Empire.”

“Then whose?”

“The Zakuul…this is an example of their mercy. Keeping her like this…awake but aware of nothing.”

“If you know where she is, why don’t you help her?”

“It’s not as easy as that. You see…there are obstacles. Tell me…would you like to help her? Make right what you did?”

Theron’s gaze fixed on Shara’s image once more. “Help…yeah. That’s what I do…I help people…” His brows furrowed and he stared off into the distance as if he had something important to remember, but couldn’t.

One’s lips curled up at the corners. “Excellent. We’re going to help a great many people, you and I.”

The com unit chimed, and the image of one of Jadus’s twelve automatons sprouted up from the device. “Lord Jadus desires a word with you,” he said in a robotic monotone.

“Of course, I’ll be there momentarily.”

*****

“Get ready to jump. That roof is our stop.” Balkar warned. He stood and shifted his weight to counter the wobble and bounce of the canvas underfoot. “Take my hand.”

Lana teetered and winced at the lack of a stability. “Fine,” she muttered and clasped his hand. The wind whipped her hair in front of her eyes. “It would be easier, if I could actually see. Blasted wind.”

“You’re fine. On three…we drop. One…two…three!” Balkar leapt off the canvas roof of the party barge, Lana at his side.

Balkar landed with a grunt. “See? That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

“Let’s get out of sight, shall we? Before all this is for naught…”

“Don’t gotta tell me twice. C’mon.”

Ten minutes later, Balkar edged open the door to his safehouse. “Stay back…” He put his finger to his lips. He drew his blaster and ducked into each of the three rooms and then nodded. “We’re clear.”

“This is your safehouse?”

Balkar shrugged, “Yeah, home away from home. I know it’s not much but I’ll give you the grand tour.”

Lana shut and secured the door behind her and explored the sparsely furnished apartment. “No need, I think I can figure out the three rooms all by myself.”

“Well, just in case, the refresher is through that door. The pleasure palace is through there,” Balkar winked.

“Let’s just get down to business shall we?”

“Yes ma’am.” He shucked his coat and slid in next to her on the chesterfield. “Drink? I’ve got a great vintage of Corellian brandy stocked…” He snatched up the bottle off the caf table and tilted it back and forth, as if trying to decide if there was enough for two drinks.

“Not that kind of business Agent Balkar…”

“Jonas. Remember?”

“I wish I didn’t,” she muttered.

“Wow, Theron never mentioned how much of a buzzkill you are.”

“I imagine that would be because he’s a gentleman. At any rate…we need a plan.”

“Sure, but tell me first…what the hell was that at the Slippery Slope? They weren’t comin’ after me…they were after you.”

“It’s complicated.”

“I think I can keep up. Try me.” Balkar poured himself three fingers of brandy and sank back into his end of the chesterfield.

“After Darth Marr’s passing…others took it upon themselves to usurp his authority over the spheres he governed, Sith Intelligence being one of them. I had hoped Lord Scourge would have taken his place...but that seems unlikely, at least in the interim. Darth Ravage and Darth Mortis remain unaccounted for…I’ve little doubt they’d have taken control were they able…”

“So who’s running the show in the Empire then?”

“That…would be Darth Acina,” Lana forced the name through her teeth.

“I’m getting the vibe you and she don’t get along.”

“She’s insufferable. Needless to say, she had her people ransack Intelligence…and when she discovered my communications with you, my past dealings with Theron…and…” She lowered her gaze and stared at the lurid purple rug under her feet.

“And what?”

“It seems one of her people has a capture of that time when I released you and Theron from Lord Scourge’s custody, back on Dromund Kaas.”

“So…Acina’s branded you as a traitor and you’ve been sacked from your position as Minister. Right?”

“Yes…that about sums it up, quite neatly in fact. She has the gall to call herself Empress now. So…I’m unable to return home, my assets have been seized, and now to add insult to injury it appears she’s having me hunted by her own personal death squad.”

“You need this more than I do.” He pressed the untouched brandy into her clasped hands. “Go on drink up…I’m not going to try to take advantage of you after one drink…I usually try after three or four, it ups my chance of success.”

Lana stared down at the quivering amber liquid in the glass. She cracked a grin and laughed in spite of her resolve. “I suppose I needed that…thank you.”

“Look…it’s not the end of the world. We can hole up here for as long as we need to…sort out how to get Theron back safe…and then…we’ll see? We’re all in the same boat really…we’re actually in a pretty good position.” Balkar poured himself the left over brandy.

“And how do you see that?”

“We can do whatever the hell we want.”

“I suppose you’re right. No one to answer to but each other.”

“Now you’re getting it.” He clinked his tumbler against hers.

*****

“Lord Jadus.” One clasped his hands behind his back and waited to be acknowledged. The conference table usually surrounded by the jury was empty and the chamber echoed with the slightest movement by either of them.

“Agent, I understand the subject performed as expected. Your methods of indoctrination have proven effective and you have earned my esteem.”

“Thank you Lord Jadus. The subject grows more devoted with each passing moment.”

“I would see you continue your work on a grander scale.”

“Preparations are already underway,” One tilted his head in deference.

“The dawn of my ascension is upon us—a new epoch, agent—an epoch—pregnant with enmity and loathing the likes of which the galaxy has merely sampled. Upon my advent, I will expunge every faithless recreant nibbling at the crumbs of the Empire’s majesty, and the devoted, will be uplifted and know that I, and I alone am their patriarch.” Jadus grasped the air in his fist and held it fast.

One stifled a yawn and paced, his brows pursed. “My lord, as always I am inspired and elevated by your vision, but there is something that has come to my attention…Darth Acina has declared herself Empress…over the remains of the Empire…an easy assertion when any who would challenge her are dead or missing. Shall I make Acina the first note in your grand opus?”

Jadus stood over him. One could feel the familiar dark side oozing from the Sith as if sifting through a membrane to coil around him, unseen censors probing his devotion.

One’s expression remained constant, a skill he’d perfected after years spent in Jadus’ proximity. Jadus prided himself in affecting his charges to the point of nausea and panic.

My body will not betray me. My blood will not boil and my heart will beat as it always has. I am already tainted, One thought, careful to conceal the mantra in the depths of his mind.

“Remove the usurper as you see fit, agent. Dismissed.”

“Of course my lord. With pleasure.” One bowed slightly and after three backwards steps, he turned his back on the Sith lord and smiled.

*****

Theron took a swallow of his tea and slowly lowered the cup to its saucer. He cocked his head and listened.

Nothing. He shook his head as if this would clear his mind. I heard something…whispers?

He explored the new quarters One had assigned him upon his promotion and something in the mirror caught the corner of his eye. What the hell was that?

Theron crossed the room and stood before the mirror and stared at his reflection. The more he stared, the more he appreciated what he saw. The suit draped him fluidly. Visual perfection. I look good, he thought.

Look closer…

The voice wasn’t Theron’s, but it was in his head. Who is that? The voice wasn’t unfamiliar, but like a distant echo.

Look closer Theron…go on son, look closer.

Theron scowled, but couldn’t resist the invitation. He peered into the mirror, until his nose practically touched the surface. A scarlet fleshed monster donning the same black suit Theron wore leapt out at him and he scuttled backwards and gasped. He dared a glance at the mirror again. The creature was no longer there, but the memory of it was seared into his memory.

“That wasn’t a monster…it was…me,” Theron murmured.

It’s what you’ll become…the strange voice warned.

“Who the hell are you…who’s in my head?” He clasped his head in his hands and growled in frustration.

Look again…

“If you think I’m going to fall for that again…”

No tricks this time…

Theron dropped his hands and straightened. He looked over at the mirror once more and his mouth fell open.

“It can’t be…Master Kothe…but you’re dead!”

The door to his quarters slid open and One strolled in, tapping the side of his chronometer….

Theron shot a glance at the mirror. Ardun Kothe had vanished.

“What’s the matter Theron? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

((to be continued…))

Love the action. The escape through Nar Shaddaa was great. One is a scary SOB. He's got balls if he's scheming against Jadus. Keep it up Luna!

Thanks! Glad to hear you enjoyed it! One scares even me sometimes, he's a real piece of work lol.

Lana needs to assert herself or Jonas will cheerfully drag her into ever deeper trouble. I'm glad they go after Theron for a rescue. ( Or maybe he has to rescue them afterwards considering how they go about it.)

Jonas does love his adventures lol. I'm amazed she's still speaking to him after last week's free fall through Nar Shaddaa traffic lol. I think after that she can pretty much handle anything really lol.

Theron pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes shut. “I just might’ve. I’m not sure. Can’t tell if I’m hallucinating or what.”

One sat on the center of the chesterfield, sprawling comfortably, both arms riding the top of the backrest. “Hallucinations are common with fatigue. Who did you see? If you don’t mind my asking?”

“Someone I used to work with ages ago, when I was still with the SIS.”

“A rival? A mentor?”

“Mentor. Used to be a Jedi.” Theron clasped his forehead, soothing the pain thrumming impatiently inside his skull.

“A Jedi…tell me more—but first, let me get you something for that headache.” One stood and sauntered into the refresher, emerging seconds later with a phial of clear fluid. “Take half of this. If you have trouble sleeping, take the rest.”

Theron obeyed and set the remaining medicine aside. “Not much to tell…we were close…”

“Were? Sounds like something came between you.”

“Yeah, you could say that—Cipher Nine killed him.” Theron averted his gaze, taking care to avoid the mirror. “That was a long time ago, not sure why I’d be seeing him in my mirror,” Theron forced a chuckle.

“Likely fatigue, but if you have any further trouble, don’t hesitate to tell me. We’ll get to the bottom of it, whatever it is.”

“Thanks. Hey, how did your meeting with Darth Jadus go?”

“Interesting that you should bring that up…”

“How so?” Theron flopped into the chair across from One.

“Before I get to that, your toxicity darts brought down The Hero of Tython before she defected?”

“Yeah, it’s true.” Theron’s gaze dropped to the floor. He felt the heat under his cheeks webbing up to his vision turning it bleary. Don’t think about her…not now.

One cocked his head and watched him with a calculating gaze. “We have a job coming up, you and I.”

“What’s it got to do with…with Incarnal?” Theron knew if he said her true name he’d break down.

“Nothing. We’re going to pay Kaas City a little visit…Darth Acina has overstayed her welcome as Empress.”

“You want her dead?”

“Yes, but not straightaway. I have need of her.”

Theron whistled low. “That’s no small task…got a plan?”

“I’m working on it,” One smiled cryptically. “We’ll speak again. Why don’t you take the rest of that,” he nodded at the phial, “and call it a night.”

“You’re probably right. Thanks again…One?”

“Mmm?”

“Do you have an actual name? Referring to you as a number seems a bit weird to me.”

One considered Theron for a long moment. “Blasphemy.”

“Which part?”

“No, that’s my name…Blas for short.”

“Seriously?” Theron smirked.

“Don’t make me regret telling you. Look I know you’re going to ask,” he sighed, “suffice it to say, my parents hoped to raise a Sith, and failed to understand how the naming conventions worked. No doubt they thought it would better my chances somehow. It’s only marginally worse than the name my older brother was given…” One shook his head.

“What was his name?”

One stood and tugged at the hem of his suitcoat to straighten it. “The Disgrace of Druckenwell—hmph…” A thoughtful look passed over One’s features, “That’s a story for another time…it’s getting late and I have a mission in the morning. Good night.”

Theron watched him leave, and then warily turned to investigate the mirror and found it mercifully empty, save for his own reflection.

*****

The next morning, Lana emerged from Balkar’s bedroom, dressed and ready to work. She expected to find him passed out on the chesterfield, but found him hunched over asleep on his desk instead, datapad still in hand.

She searched the cupboards in the tiny kitchen for something resembling caf and when she found it, she set it up to brew and washed a pair of cups. After finding a box of breakfast wafers, she glanced over at her host.

Curiosity pushed her closer to Balkar and the papers he’d strewn over his desk. She peered over his shoulder, and while the first article she found was a publication called Huttsler, the rest of it seemed to be a mish mash of code, and notes he’d made of conversations with several contacts.

She found herself surprised that Balkar had gone back to work, after he’d graciously given her the use of his room. The pleasure palace indeed, she smirked. His room was clean and simply furnished, though she had to admit his choice of bedding was so luxurious she almost didn’t want to get up. The man understood what having a good thread count meant.

The dog eared corners of Huttsler lured her attention, and after peering under a page, almost as if expecting it to bite, she wished she hadn’t—the pictures of Hutts in lewd poses and costumes, would haunt her for the rest of her days. She wrinkled her nose and shuddered. Some things cannot be unseen, she thought.

Her brow quirked up, when she recognized Theron’s handwritten scrawl across the centerfold that read, ‘Enjoy your lifetime subscription. Happy Life Day!’ She smiled broadly at what was clearly a gag gift, and then her smile faded. We have to get him back…but how?

She sifted through Balkar’s papers and frowned. He’d driven himself hard, but to no avail. Where in the galaxy would we even begin to look? She considered waking him, but then thought better of it. He’d been up all night…he needed the rest. She caught herself reliving a few of their moments together, and while he had the ability to irritate her unlike anyone she’d ever known, there was something about him…a gentleness in his eyes that she enjoyed and the warm mirth in his voice. And unlike many others he was capable of making her laugh.

Lana, you’re being ridiculous. He’s impossible…and an agent. No. No. No.

Still, he’d saved her, and that was worth her respect and patience. She spread the throw from the chesterfield over his shoulders. But if he ever decides to jump off a perfectly good building into traffic again, and drag you with him…

She stalked off, shaking her head. Still it was an adventure…her mind added quickly as if trying to sell her on the joys of making Jonas Balkar’s acquaintance.

While she prepared her caf, he groaned and began to stir.

“Where the hell…oh yeah.” He rubbed his eyes and yawned. He blinked sleepily and breathed in the aroma of freshly brewed caf. “Lana?”

“Good morning. I’d ask if you slept well, but I think I already know the answer.” She set down his mug and the plate of breakfast wafers before him.

“Yeah…I’ve slept better. How about you? You look good…you’re not one of those morning people are you?”

“As a matter of fact…I am, and yes, I was very comfortable, thank you. But perhaps we ought to switch tonight, if need be. I’ll gladly take a turn on the chesterfield.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it. Caf is great Frosty, thank you.”

“Jonas…could you not?”

“A’right. I’ll behave. Guess that means calling you Darth Glacier is out of the question then too, huh? Or what about, the Snow Miser? That’s got a nice ring to it.”

“I wouldn’t chance it, unless you want something frozen off. I do know where you sleep now, and I am Sith, so I’m not above it,” Lana laughed.

“That’s what I like to see in the morning. So, any thoughts on how we should go about finding Theron?”

“All we have to go on, is that he’s been taken by One…but they could be anywhere in the galaxy. We could try tapping into the major spaceport security cams…”

“Thought of that already. Nothing came up. You knew One…how well did you know him?”

“That’s a bit personal…”

“Only if you tell me the good stuff sweetheart…what I meant is—does he have any family? I get the feeling he doesn’t have any friends and his enemies don’t live long.”

Lana pursed her lips in thought, “You’re not wrong. He always was the loner sort…not unlike Theron in that way. You’ve profiled him, I see.”

“I like to know who we’re up against. I won’t lie, this guy has me worried.”

“Me too,” she sipped her caf. “There are a couple of people we could try, if we can track them down...the former Keeper and Watcher Two. She might have some insight in particular, they dated, if the vending machine gossip is true…and then there is his brother.”

“The former keeper and Watcher Two…Theron worked on her case…she was carbon frozen and put on a prisoner transport…but something happened to it…either pirates commandeered the vessel…or your people ran a rescue op.”

Lana shook her head, “It was before my time in Intelligence, but I’m certain it wasn’t my people. I would’ve known, but I will see what more I can learn to be sure.”

Jonas tapped his datapad and took a slurp of caf. “Sounds like a plan. Who’s the brother?”

“Major Malavai Quinn…but that’s a problem. I’ve no doubt he’s on Dromund Kaas.”

“Right…and you can’t go home because of Darth Arsina.”

Lana smirked, “It’s Darth Acina, but you’re closer to the truth of it, in spirit.”

“It suits her better, from what I hear. What…a…b.itch.”

“You’ll get no argument from me.” Her expression quickly grew serious again. “Anyhow, the Major was among those who fought alongside Darth Marr. The Wrath sacrificed herself to save Quinn and their crew. He’s been making inquiries through various channels for a search and rescue op, but to no avail. I don’t think Acina wants to see the Empire’s Wrath rescued…she sees her as a threat to her leadership, and rightly so.”

“Sith politics give me a headache…” Balkar sighed and dug around in his drawer for headache remedy. “Well, let’s see what we can turn up. Try your former Intelligence people first…then the brother. See who you can track down. Maybe your ex-keeper has something we can use to find Cipher Nine.”

“And you…get some proper rest. I’ll let you know what I’ve learned over dinner. Agreed?”

“Yeah…yeah, agreed.” Balkar sauntered toward his room and then stopped. “I’m glad I’m not doing this alone. Thanks for coming.”

“You’re quite welcome…I owe it to Theron.”

Balkar gave her an exaggerated salute and disappeared into his bedroom and shut the door.

“I see why the two of you are such good friends,” Lana murmured as she settled in to work.

*****

One’s body was a dark silhouette against the bank of monitors before him. He paced the row, considering each setting carefully. He was about to turn away when he caught movement out of the corner of his eye in one of them.

Theron paced his quarters, unable to sleep. Every so often, he’d peer at the mirror.

“Feeling a bit lonely, are we Theron?” One murmured to himself. “Very well. Perhaps it’s time for another visitation then.” He tapped the controls languidly and took a sip of his tea. His mouth tightened as he drank the last of it.

“Never enough damn tea…” He considered the dregs at the bottom of the pot, and despite the laziness he felt owing to the hour, he felt compelled to brew more.

He settled in with a fresh cup and biscuits, the blue glow of the monitors emphasizing his wintry demeanor. He sipped his tea and wallowed in Theron’s paranoia.

“Showtime…”

*****

Theron shook his head but was unable to resist peering into the mirror. I need sleep…I probably imagined the whole thing. What could Master Kothe possibly want with me? Maybe he’s trying to warn you…

He seized a chair and steered it toward the mirror and sat face to face with his reflection. His sideburns were peppered with new grey hairs giving him a distinguished look. He stared at his reflection until he felt self-conscious and foolish. No sooner was he about to spring out of his chair, that the whispers started again.

“Master Kothe…is that you?” He whispered.

A moment later, Ardun Kothe’s image stood before him in the mirror. “Yeah, it’s me.”

“So…this is real…I’m not imagining you.”

“You’re talking to a Force ghost in a mirror. Of course it’s real. I figured it was finally time you and I had a chat.”

“I don’t see what about,” Theron frowned.

“You’re still angry I didn’t recruit you.”

“I would’ve been perfect for the team…but for the life of me, I’ll never figure out why...You picked Chance…over me?”

“Because I knew it was likely going to turn into a suicide mission and I didn’t want that for you,” Kothe murmured.

“Maybe you’d still be alive, if you had.”

“True, but there is also the great likelihood that you’d have died with me, when Legate betrayed us.”

“There was always that chance, but like you said, it’s part of the job.” Theron ran his hand through his hair. “Why are you even coming to me about this? Why now? I’d put this behind me ages ago.”

“Because it’s time you learned the truth.”

“And what truth is that?”

Ardun Kothe’s image ran his hand over his jaw before answering, “What I have to say won’t be easy for you to hear.”

“When is it ever? People don’t tend to come back from the dead with good news.”

Kothe’s image chuckled, “You’ve got a point.”

“Look, if you feel bad about leaving me behind…I think I can let by-gones be by-gones.”

“I never did tell you the story of how I came to work for the SIS.”

“I know you were a Jedi before…but no, you never told me why you left.”

“When I figured it out…I wanted to come to you…but I couldn’t find the words. A part of me hoped you’d figure it out on your own and come to me instead…” Kothe smiled wistfully, “but that would have been the easy way out…”

“I don’t understand Master Kothe.”

“I left the Jedi Order, because I fell in love.”

Theron grimaced, “Not like that hasn’t ever happened…”

“I figure you’re in a better position now to understand. After all you’ve been through.”

“What has your leaving the order have to do with me?”

“Everything,” Kothe hesitated, “You’re my son.”

“What? No, that can’t be!”

“Your mother and I…we were in love, and you’re a product of that.”

“Are you insane? My father…is Jace Malcolm.”

Kothe shook his head. “No…your mother lied…”

“This is crazy…you’re telling me, you’re my father. No way in hell.”

“Don’t be so sure…look at me…really look at me…the resemblance is there, son.”

“Don’t call me son. I’m not your son.”

“I arranged for you to come to the SIS when the Jedi dismissed you…I trained you, got close to you. I wanted to know you.”

“Why in the hell would my mother tell me my father is the Supreme Commander, if you were?”

“There are some things I can’t answer…but if you search your feelings…you’ll know what I’m saying is true.”

“It doesn’t matter…you’re dead…she’s dead. Hell, the Supreme Commander’s probably dead too.”

“It does matter…Legate betrayed us. Legate was Cipher Nine, and she needs to pay for what she did. It wasn’t just me…but Saber and Wheel too.”

“Cipher Nine…I keep hearing her name—first Raina, then One…and now you.” Theron paced and rubbed at the nape of his neck. “Something is wrong…”

“I can’t rest, until she’s brought to justice,” Kothe said.

Theron gnashed his teeth and growled. “I don’t even know how I’m supposed to do that!” He threw up his hands and paced. “Tell me how?”

He glared at Kothe, and after he vanished from the mirror, Theron stalked back to his room and threw himself into bed, shuddering against the feel of the glacial sheets against his skin. Kark. It’s freezing in here, he thought, teeth chattering.

I’d much rather see Lia…dream about her. He repeated the desperate hope until it grew into a mantra, bringing with it the unruly sleep of the anxious.

*****

Cipher Nine stared out at the rose coloured nebula, hoping to lose herself within its smoky folds. The gaseous clouds served as a camouflaging cloak for the Phantom which drifted practically invisible through the phenomenon. The hour rendered the ship quiet, and she welcomed the silence.

Another reflection joined hers in the viewport, and while she wasn’t up to smiling, she was heartened by his presence. “Vector…don’t tell me you couldn’t sleep either?”

“We sensed the discord in your aura,” he reached out to cup her cheek and smiled. She encouraged his affection and closed her eyes for a moment to revel in the poetry of his touch. “Something is wrong,” he continued.

“Raina missed her scheduled check in…I have a bad feeling about this Vector. It’s not like her.”

“No…it isn’t, but perhaps she’s only encountered some difficulty…we may yet hear from her.”

“I can’t put my finger on it…it’s a feeling I have. One or Jadus might have discovered the truth. I should never have allowed her on this mission.”

“Ilia…we understand that you feel responsible for her, but she knows the risks—we all do. The mission was something she wanted. It wouldn’t have been right to hold her back.”

“One and Jadus are monsters…she’s young, unprepared for the sorts of tactics they use. Even a seasoned agent would need to take the utmost care around them.”

“You trained her well. She could not have asked for a more qualified commanding officer than you. Everything you know, you passed on to her. Even Eckard said she had the finest of teachers. She was more than ready for this.”

He took her hands in his, lavishing soft soothing strokes over them with his thumbs.

“I do hope you’re right Vector. But I can’t shake this feeling I have. She was starting to fall for him—I could tell by her last communique…I know the man, he can be very charming and very persuasive…and if she surrendered to that…believed for even one moment he was sincere…she’s as good as dead. He’s incapable of love.”

“We have never asked…but we are curious, how well were you acquainted with One?”

“Well enough.” She glanced up at him meaningfully. “There was a time…a long time ago, when I caught myself falling for him. I was very young and foolish. If not for Keeper…” She shook her head, “He stopped me from making the worst mistake of my life.”

“We know Keeper is important to you…and we are thankful that he was able to protect you. We will always be grateful.” He drew her hands upwards and met them with a kiss.

“He did a lot for me. Even more than I realized at the time. I see that now. Jadus…he was entrancing…and I’d never felt so flattered. I let the Sith’s attention go to my head. I couldn’t see it then. You don’t know how close I came to throwing everything away for Jadus. They’re poison…the both of them.”

“Ilia,” he trailed the backs of his fingers over her cheek, “We love you. It was your kind and gentle nature that drew us to you…rare qualities in all the galaxy, but especially within our Empire. Whatever fear or worry burdens you, know that you are not alone. We carry it with you.” He placed his hand over his heart as if making an oath.

“I love you, Vector. Let’s go back to bed…”

“Some rest would do you good.”

“Who said anything about resting?”

Vector blushed, and his dark eyes glinted, “Who indeed?”

*****

One downed the last of his tea and set the cup and saucer aside with a clinking sound. He walked the line of monitors and paused at the last in the row. He focussed on the vacant expression, searching it for a spark of awareness.

“Tomorrow Shara…we’ll be together again. Tomorrow.” His lip quirked up at the corner and his rectangular optical implants glinted a blue silver in the monitor’s light.

((To be continued…next weeks installment may be delayed a few days owing to the holidays. Merry Christmas, and Happy Holidays to everyone! Vote if you're enjoying! ))

Seriously, it isn't happening what I think it does? Cipher One is one hardcore sociopath.

I hope that Lana and Balkar get e few more allies together and smoke him out.

Seriously, it isn't happening what I think it does? Cipher One is one hardcore sociopath.

 

I hope that Lana and Balkar get e few more allies together and smoke him out.

I think they may need them to be honest, as you say, One is pretty hard core and likes his mind games.

I like the dynamic between Lana and Jonas.

As always, looking forward to the next part.

I like the dynamic between Lana and Jonas.

 

As always, looking forward to the next part.

Thank you thank you! I'm enjoying them too. ^^

Wow I can't get over the mind f***ery One is pulling. Terrifying if you think about it. I can't wait to see the next chapter, it looks like Nine has an fascinating past.

Thanks for letting me know! The imput means a lot and keeps me going. I'm glad you find One a bit scary, I'm finding that spending time researching and living in his mind is a bit bizarre lol. I feel like I'm taking psychopathy and sociopathy 101 lol. Nine does have some interesting history, I hope One lets me explore some of it lol.

I was rather enjoying this, right up till the part where you decided you just had to kick Satelle's corpse a few more times with this revelation of an affair with her former master. Please tell me this is some sort of head trick being played on Theron? Haven't you done enough to that character already without projecting your MCs problem of sleeping with any guy who is nice to her? Your really portraying her as sleeping with her former mentor during the same time she was having an affair with Jace and then lied to him and Theron later? After that last moment she had with Theron and saying she had no regrets, how could you do this?

A Jedi spirit coming back to ask for vengeance, not justice, not it needs to be done, but get this person cause they screwed them over, thats what a Sith spirit would do, not a Jedi at peace with them self enough to become one with the Force upon death.

I like a lot of your writing, but I'm not going to pretend some parts strike me as not so good, with your twisting of established characters to fit your personal preferences. SO before I turn the comments back over to the screaming fan boys and girls who only heap non-stop praise upon you, could you not try to destroy Theron's mother by making her to have been a lying, two timing tramp, just to make Darth Mary Sue not look quite so bad in comparison?

I was rather enjoying this, right up till the part where you decided you just had to kick Satelle's corpse a few more times with this revelation of an affair with her former master. Please tell me this is some sort of head trick being played on Theron? Haven't you done enough to that character already without projecting your MCs problem of sleeping with any guy who is nice to her? Your really portraying her as sleeping with her former mentor during the same time she was having an affair with Jace and then lied to him and Theron later? After that last moment she had with Theron and saying she had no regrets, how could you do this?

 

A Jedi spirit coming back to ask for vengeance, not justice, not it needs to be done, but get this person cause they screwed them over, thats what a Sith spirit would do, not a Jedi at peace with them self enough to become one with the Force upon death.

 

I like a lot of your writing, but I'm not going to pretend some parts strike me as not so good, with your twisting of established characters to fit your personal preferences. SO before I turn the comments back over to the screaming fan boys and girls who only heap non-stop praise upon you, could you not try to destroy Theron's mother by making her to have been a lying, two timing tramp, just to make Darth Mary Sue not look quite so bad in comparison?

I'm not kicking anyone's corpse or trashing anyone. Think about the character One for a moment...think about who he is. He is a sociopath. He is running a brainwashing and mind control system on Theron. I've researched the techniques for the story:

1. Assault on identity

2.The Establishment of Guilt

3.The Self-betrayal

4.Breaking point: Total Conflict and the Basic Fear

5.Leniency and Opportunity

6.The Compulsion to confess

7.The Channeling of guilt

8.Re-education: Logical Dishonoring

9.Progress and harmony

10.Final confession

11.Rebirth

12.Release

The basic idea with mind control is to destroy the old identity/personality and replace it with a new one, that holds to the ideals and values of the person doing the manipulating. One is systematically destroying, or trying to destroy everything Theron is and knows to be true. He's making him question himself.

The truth hasn't changed, Satele and Jace are still Theron's parents. Satele was true to Jace and the Jedi Order. She didn't have an affair with Ardun Kothe. It's all part of a system to devaluate, dehumanize and essentially make Theron question everything he knows to be the truth.

One has so far implied through various methods that Theron's friends weren't really his friends, his family lied to him and he isn't who he thought. One caught Theron at one of the lowest points of his life, which made Theron easier to manipulate and control.

Anything that One does or says to anyone cannot be believed for certain. He is devoid of any human sympathy, empathy or decency. I'll say this much. How many times have you seen a Force ghost appear in a mirror? Never. That's because it's a trick. Everything you've seen and heard is a lie.

I hope that helps you with your enjoyment of the story. I know how you hate it when I get creative.

PS. I really resent your use of the term Mary Sue when it comes to Liatrix. She is nothing like me. I don't look like her, I don't sound like her, and I'm most definitely not the sort of person to sleep around. Too much information time...I've been with the same person faithfully for almost 29 years. Does that sound like Liatrix?

Here is the def of Mary Sue: ' A female fanfiction character who is so perfect as to be annoying. The male equivlalent is the Marty-Stu. Often abbreviated to "Sue". A Mary Sue character is usually written by a beginning author. Often, the Mary Sue is a self-insert with a few "improvements" (ex. better body, more popular, etc). The Mary Sue character is almost always beautiful, smart, etc... In short, she is the "perfect" girl.'

Liatrix is anything but perfect. She has her own compass, sometimes it means she's decent, sometimes she's outright horrible and evil. You've pointed out her failings several times, so obviously she is not 'perfect' and not a Mary Sue.

Additionally, I am not a beginning author. I'm a published novelist and I've been writing for years. I do this for fun and hope that others enjoy the stories as well. Right now, I'm having personal issues that make me a bit short of temper and lacking in time. It's quite possible my mother isn't getting out of the hospital this time and it's killing me inside. And I really didn't need the kick in the teeth you know? But thanks for your insight all the same. As always I'm considering it, probably more than I should.

I've been purposely staying away from this forum just because of people like Doug. If you want to read and enjoy, please do so. If you don't, then you alone have the opportunity to not click on the thread. Either way, be constructive, or encouraging, or just shut up. Thank you, Lunafox, for posting here, but like I told you before, I've had it with those who feel the need to tear everyone else down just to build themselves up.

You know you always have my support, but I think I'm just going to leave this pool of negativity behind. See you on the other site.

PS. I sincerely hope your mother improves, and if that isn't the case, that you both find some peace with it.

I've been purposely staying away from this forum just because of people like Doug. If you want to read and enjoy, please do so. If you don't, then you alone have the opportunity to not click on the thread. Either way, be constructive, or encouraging, or just shut up. Thank you, Lunafox, for posting here, but like I told you before, I've had it with those who feel the need to tear everyone else down just to build themselves up.

 

You know you always have my support, but I think I'm just going to leave this pool of negativity behind. See you on the other site.

 

PS. I sincerely hope your mother improves, and if that isn't the case, that you both find some peace with it.

Thanks for the kind words and well wishes Mags, it means a lot to me. I know that you've been avoiding this place, and I think it's sad that someone as friendly, encouraging and talented as you are feels the need to stay away. I'm glad that I've found you over at the other site. That way we can at least keep up.

Fan fiction at it's core is a chance to explore different ideas in a universe you've come to love, and when you can't be as creative as you like without judgement or delve into the subject matter that interests you, well it just steals the joy out of it, and at a time when spirits are low, it certainly doesn't buoy you to keep going either.

Anyhow thanks for encouragement, and Happy New Year to you!

I'm not kicking anyone's corpse or trashing anyone. Think about the character One for a moment...think about who he is. He is a sociopath. He is running a brainwashing and mind control system on Theron. I've researched the techniques for the story:

 

1. Assault on identity

2.The Establishment of Guilt

3.The Self-betrayal

4.Breaking point: Total Conflict and the Basic Fear

5.Leniency and Opportunity

6.The Compulsion to confess

7.The Channeling of guilt

8.Re-education: Logical Dishonoring

9.Progress and harmony

10.Final confession

11.Rebirth

12.Release

 

 

The basic idea with mind control is to destroy the old identity/personality and replace it with a new one, that holds to the ideals and values of the person doing the manipulating. One is systematically destroying, or trying to destroy everything Theron is and knows to be true. He's making him question himself.

 

The truth hasn't changed, Satele and Jace are still Theron's parents. Satele was true to Jace and the Jedi Order. She didn't have an affair with Ardun Kothe. It's all part of a system to devaluate, dehumanize and essentially make Theron question everything he knows to be the truth.

 

One has so far implied through various methods that Theron's friends weren't really his friends, his family lied to him and he isn't who he thought. One caught Theron at one of the lowest points of his life, which made Theron easier to manipulate and control.

 

Anything that One does or says to anyone cannot be believed for certain. He is devoid of any human sympathy, empathy or decency. I'll say this much. How many times have you seen a Force ghost appear in a mirror? Never. That's because it's a trick. Everything you've seen and heard is a lie.

 

I hope that helps you with your enjoyment of the story. I know how you hate it when I get creative.

 

 

PS. I really resent your use of the term Mary Sue when it comes to Liatrix. She is nothing like me. I don't look like her, I don't sound like her, and I'm most definitely not the sort of person to sleep around. Too much information time...I've been with the same person faithfully for almost 29 years. Does that sound like Liatrix?

 

 

 

Here is the def of Mary Sue: ' A female fanfiction character who is so perfect as to be annoying. The male equivlalent is the Marty-Stu. Often abbreviated to "Sue". A Mary Sue character is usually written by a beginning author. Often, the Mary Sue is a self-insert with a few "improvements" (ex. better body, more popular, etc). The Mary Sue character is almost always beautiful, smart, etc... In short, she is the "perfect" girl.'

 

Liatrix is anything but perfect. She has her own compass, sometimes it means she's decent, sometimes she's outright horrible and evil. You've pointed out her failings several times, so obviously she is not 'perfect' and not a Mary Sue.

 

Additionally, I am not a beginning author. I'm a published novelist and I've been writing for years. I do this for fun and hope that others enjoy the stories as well. Right now, I'm having personal issues that make me a bit short of temper and lacking in time. It's quite possible my mother isn't getting out of the hospital this time and it's killing me inside. And I really didn't need the kick in the teeth you know? But thanks for your insight all the same. As always I'm considering it, probably more than I should.

Hello there!

This is my first time posting in...well...4 or 5 years. I have a story on here which, personally, I love and I'm sure more than a few people genuinely hate/dislike or are apathetic towards. Really, I could care less because I like it, but I just wanted to give you some background as to who this random person is posting on your story

First off I want to say that your writing style is superb, and you elicit several emotions, both positive and negative, in me as a reader. I don't like everything you do, and will get into that later, but I do love how you develop characters and the general mind-snaps you pull out of your story.

Having said that, you blew it on Darth Marr being Liatrix's father. I can't remember the exact passage which clued me, but I called it long before the reveal and was kind of bummed when I turned out to be right. The exultation and satisfaction of having been correct, combined with your wicked-good storytelling, outweighed my disappointment, however

Ultimately what inspired me to post on this thread, of all threads, was not the story but the comments I've been reading. Yes, I agonizingly read every comment, sometimes in utter annoyance at the continual replies that are not new chapters. Before I continue, let me stress this is constructive criticism, potentially at a rather volatile junction, and, more importantly, merely my own personal opinion of both the story and yourself as an author.

So if you don't like what I am about to post: I get it. And I don't care. (Very important as we continue).

For an established author, which you are (frankly I've been tempted several times to purchase your novels), you care far too much about other people's opinions and words. The fact that you can provoke such a negative response as the person who reviewed you negatively is proof that you are doing something right with your story. Now, granted, they didn't catch the Jedi-mind tricks Agent One is currently owning Tharan with (I almost missed it myself), but that's okay.

Honestly? I agree that you have handled Satele poorly. It's your story, though, and if you want Satele to be a hypocrite (which she ultimately is, as are all Jedi), then you go for it. I support that; but I do not like it.

I suppose what bothers me the most about you as an author is twofold:

#1 - You take the time to respond to EVERY comment. While this is quite frankly unparalleled by other writers, I find that it portrays that you care far too much about what other people think. I struggled with this for many years while writing my first novel, and subsequently wrote myself into a hole I never came back from. It took me four tries to get my own story right, and that was only when I realized what other people think means nothing in my own story.

#2 - You are allowing real personal events to influence how you respond to others. I can't imagine what you are going through right now with your mom. My prayers go with her (and you), and I truly hope she recovers. But just like work you cannot let that influence how you treat, speak, or respond to others. Yes, it seems like I am blowing this out of proportion. Yes, this particular poster has hammered you a few times in the past. Doesn't mean he's wrong. Doesn't make it right to respond aggressively. It's their opinion. It's your story. Ignore them, consider the source, always consider the feedback, and continue writing (please!) because the universe you have made is incredible.

My biggest praise for this story is that I personally check this every day when I wake up (I purposefully wake up 20 minutes early to read the news and other media--this included) and before I go to bed I check again to see if you've updated. You are part of my daily routine. That's how great this adventure has been and continues to be.

Also, your depiction/vision for Marr was flippin' perfect. Darth Marr is second only to Darth Revan in most awesome-dark-Sith Lords-ever (my opinion, of course).

My highest annoyance/disgust for this story is Liatrix. I really dislike her as a character. Every once in awhile I fist-pump (like when she shafted the Chancellor. Yes please!), but ultimately I despise her. I thought the pheromones explanation did well to explain some of, what I found, to be ridiculous attraction, but ultimately for me it falls short. Unfortunately I perceive Liatrix as--well, I won't say the word. She is very promiscuous.

Your best characters, by far, are your depictions of Darth Marr (whom if truly dead will cause me to be most displeased) and HK-51.

My least favorite depictions in this universe? Satele Shan (You did her a true disservice in my opinion) and Jace Malcom. The one question that continually reverberates through my head when I read anything you've written regarding the Republic: Can they possibly be more incompetent?

That's all I have for now. Again, thank you for your wonderful story. Thank you for taking the time to get to this point of my post (if you did) and I hope you consider my feedback

My answers in blue.

Keep going Luna, you got me hooked. Can't wait to read the next part. Your characters and your take on the canon characters is great. I got finished with Foundation Of All Desire and Trix is great. She's complicated and unpredictable and I liked her. I hope you'll write a sequel for it. I read it through slower this time and I can see you spent a lot of time putting it all together. When are you putting up the next part? Hint hint

Thanks for the encouragement. I'm thrilled that you enjoyed it. It means a lot to know that you enjoyed what was a large part of my year this year. I'll be continuing with Spy Vs Spy for a bit, and then perhaps, I'll do something further with the characters of Foundation. Or I might explore some prequel type stuff involving Marr in his younger years. That's way off into the future. Guess it just depends on the climate, if I get the idea that people would enjoy seeing the story continued, and time permitting, will decide if the show goes on. I'm hoping to have the next installment up late Friday night/early Saturday morning. Things are a bit unpredictable these days for me. Happy New Year to you!

Hello there!

 

This is my first time posting in...well...4 or 5 years. I have a story on here which, personally, I love and I'm sure more than a few people genuinely hate/dislike or are apathetic towards. Really, I could care less because I like it, but I just wanted to give you some background as to who this random person is posting on your story

 

Hi there, nice to meet you, it's always nice to know who's reading. That's quite a gap for posting, maybe you should give it another go if your time permits, or even do a shorter piece in the short story thread, if you have little time, or just want to get your feet wet again.

 

First off I want to say that your writing style is superb, and you elicit several emotions, both positive and negative, in me as a reader. I don't like everything you do, and will get into that later, but I do love how you develop characters and the general mind-snaps you pull out of your story.

 

Thanks, that's always a lovely compliment to get. Evoking feeling is very important to me...I know a piece has succeeded if it made me feel something, whether it be joy, anger, or sadness. That goes for both my own work, and others, as well as movies and television.

 

Having said that, you blew it on Darth Marr being Liatrix's father. I can't remember the exact passage which clued me, but I called it long before the reveal and was kind of bummed when I turned out to be right. The exultation and satisfaction of having been correct, combined with your wicked-good storytelling, outweighed my disappointment, however

 

Ah, yeah, it's not always easy to tell when you're up close and personal with a work, if something is obvious enough, too obvious, or too subtle for notice. I think I know the passage you mean, it's when I described his appearance, he's got an iconic appearance, and there really wasn't anyone else it could have been. If I ever decide to re-write this in some capacity, I'll be keeping that in mind. I'm glad that even though you guessed correctly, it didn't bother you too much.

 

Ultimately what inspired me to post on this thread, of all threads, was not the story but the comments I've been reading. Yes, I agonizingly read every comment, sometimes in utter annoyance at the continual replies that are not new chapters. Before I continue, let me stress this is constructive criticism, potentially at a rather volatile junction, and, more importantly, merely my own personal opinion of both the story and yourself as an author.

 

I can appreciate that, and thank you for the time you've taken to let me know what you're thinking.

 

So if you don't like what I am about to post: I get it. And I don't care. (Very important as we continue).

 

I take to heart what people tell me, I figure they've taken the time to tell me these things, and if done so gently, I don't get too bothered. It is what it is. But being human, sometimes, some things come off a bit mean. Maybe they weren't intended that way, but with type it's hard to tell sometimes.

 

For an established author, which you are (frankly I've been tempted several times to purchase your novels), you care far too much about other people's opinions and words. The fact that you can provoke such a negative response as the person who reviewed you negatively is proof that you are doing something right with your story. Now, granted, they didn't catch the Jedi-mind tricks Agent One is currently owning Tharan with (I almost missed it myself), but that's okay.

 

Thank you. As I said before, making people feel something from the work is always meaningful. Of course positives are always easier to take than negatives, because when you spend so much time on a thing it becomes like your child...you love it...no matter what....even if at times it behaves poorly. Writing as you know, is a very personal thing, and for a long time, it was hard for me to even bring myself to share it.

 

Honestly? I agree that you have handled Satele poorly. It's your story, though, and if you want Satele to be a hypocrite (which she ultimately is, as are all Jedi), then you go for it. I support that; but I do not like it.

 

I'm sorry that you feel that way about how I handled Satele, but I understand, you enjoy that character and no one wants to see a favorite trashed. That said, I felt like I'd been fair with her, even though I don't enjoy the character personally. I agree with your hypocrite assessment and carry that with me when I deal with Jedi. But I felt that I can't tar everyone with the same brush, so I worked with Relnex and consider him to be a shining example of what a Jedi is, flaws and all. Writing from an opposing view point, tending towards darkness, and being sympathetic to the Sith, the interpretation of Satele could seem unfair at times, but she is the enemy, and there were moments she exhibited in game where she came off extremely judgemental, cold and hypocritical to me. That's my take, it is what it is.

 

I suppose what bothers me the most about you as an author is twofold:

 

#1 - You take the time to respond to EVERY comment. While this is quite frankly unparalleled by other writers, I find that it portrays that you care far too much about what other people think. I struggled with this for many years while writing my first novel, and subsequently wrote myself into a hole I never came back from. It took me four tries to get my own story right, and that was only when I realized what other people think means nothing in my own story.

 

I figure if people take the time to read and comment, I can take the time to answer. Most of the time comments fuel my drive and really help me to get through when I'm having a tough time. Someday personal responses may not be possible, but while I can, I like to. I figure they've commented in my thread, and I can do as I wish in a thread I created. (Hope that doesn't sound condescending, it's not meant to.) Do I care what people think? Yes I do...can't deny that. I'm only human.

#2 - You are allowing real personal events to influence how you respond to others. I can't imagine what you are going through right now with your mom. My prayers go with her (and you), and I truly hope she recovers. But just like work you cannot let that influence how you treat, speak, or respond to others. Yes, it seems like I am blowing this out of proportion. Yes, this particular poster has hammered you a few times in the past. Doesn't mean he's wrong. Doesn't make it right to respond aggressively. It's their opinion. It's your story. Ignore them, consider the source, always consider the feedback, and continue writing (please!) because the universe you have made is incredible.

 

Usually...I try to keep personal things out of the comments, I strive to keep to the topic at hand which is the story or thoughts about it. Other comments will back this up. But as I said, I'm only human...and sometimes circumstances give rise to the limits of patience. I feel that I'm patient most of the time, but it does get harder to do when a commenter comes across more and more aggressively every time they comment their dislike. Hard to tell with comments sometimes, but I was beginning to feel more and more hostility from the one commenter, and yeah, I have limits like anyone else. I would have been far more patient and kinder if the commenter hadn't gone so far as to outright insult something I've worked very hard on. Hate Liatrix if you like she's written that way, as an anti-hero/villain type, that's fine. One of my closest friends told me straight away she hated her, but she did so kindly. She didn't call her a Mary Sue. So I feel that while defensive, my response was fair. On a better day I probably would have let it go. The other commenter might have hammered into me, but I feel my response was fair. Again, just my opinion. Had he left off the Mary Sue comment, we would have been fine, but that was a nasty dig and unnecessary. You get what you give, that's my take on things. You've made your points, and I respect that, because you did them without being belligerent or insulting. And thank you for the kind well wishes for my mum and for me.

 

My biggest praise for this story is that I personally check this every day when I wake up (I purposefully wake up 20 minutes early to read the news and other media--this included) and before I go to bed I check again to see if you've updated. You are part of my daily routine. That's how great this adventure has been and continues to be.

 

Also, your depiction/vision for Marr was flippin' perfect. Darth Marr is second only to Darth Revan in most awesome-dark-Sith Lords-ever (my opinion, of course).

 

Thanks so much, I do appreciate knowing that. And Marr was a fun challenge, I enjoyed writing him, and also suffered and worried that I'd done my favorite Sith Lord justice.

 

My highest annoyance/disgust for this story is Liatrix. I really dislike her as a character. Every once in awhile I fist-pump (like when she shafted the Chancellor. Yes please!), but ultimately I despise her. I thought the pheromones explanation did well to explain some of, what I found, to be ridiculous attraction, but ultimately for me it falls short. Unfortunately I perceive Liatrix as--well, I won't say the word. She is very promiscuous.

 

Again, this is a bit harder for me, because she is my creation and my baby. I love her, warts and all. That said, she was written as a anti-hero at best and outright villain at worst. That's not going to change, it's something I've wanted to try for a long time. I wanted a story sympathetic to the villain. So being a villain pov, the traditional 'good guys' are going to take a kicking. I'm not sorry about how I handled Satele...I do feel a bit of remorse where Jace is concerned and I might address that sometime in the future. But, Satele did sense darkness in him, the war made him cold, hard and sometimes cruel. She couldn't be with him because of how he was. This is explored in Drew's Annihilation. I figured I'd show in my story some of the darkness Satele felt. We hadn't seen so much of it before. War changes people. After a while, it becomes on what you can save at the end of the day. Casualties cease being people and turn into numbers...maybe a way to stay sane, I'd guess.

 

As for Liatrix's 'promiscuity'...Maybe I have lax standards lol, I don't consider four lovers in over a year to be excessive. She knew them all well, she had relationships with the men in varying degrees. She embraced her sexuality, as many male heroes do. How many women does Bond enjoy in a movie? This is something that has to change, women should be able to embrace sexual liberty as much as their male counterparts. I read several interesting discussions about Charlaine Harris' heroine Sookie, from True Blood. Many called her 'promiscuous' as well...but when you consider the books and tv show both...she really wasn't so much. She was a single girl who embraced sex. It's a natural thing, and I see no issue with that. But I understand that people's ideals differ on this.

 

Your best characters, by far, are your depictions of Darth Marr (whom if truly dead will cause me to be most displeased) and HK-51.

 

I can't believe you liked my HK-51 lol. He was a pain to write lol. Marr was difficult and I sweated bullets over him, but he's someone I adore, and I appreciate that you enjoyed his portrayal.

 

My least favorite depictions in this universe? Satele Shan (You did her a true disservice in my opinion) and Jace Malcom. The one question that continually reverberates through my head when I read anything you've written regarding the Republic: Can they possibly be more incompetent?

 

We see different things in different characters, but that's okay. I have remorse in some ways about Jace...not so much about Satele. Considering she was 'the enemy' I felt I was fair, but again, that's my take. And it's funny, when you approached the stories from the Republic point of view, it always seems like the Empire is bumbling...like those jokes about stormtroopers always missing their targets and falling over themselves. I was doing a reversal...where the 'good guys' look like bumblers, because from my perspective they were the bad guys lol.

That's all I have for now. Again, thank you for your wonderful story. Thank you for taking the time to get to this point of my post (if you did) and I hope you consider my feedback

Thanks for taking the time to let me know what you thought, I appreciate the feedback.

My answers in blue.

Thanks for taking the time to let me know what you thought, I appreciate the feedback.

Appreciate you reading and replying, Luna! I wanted to let you know I agree on your statement of how incompetent the Empire appears when you are on the Light Side. With that perspective I admit that your depiction of the Republic as incompetent is actually refreshing.

You helped me see it in a new light

Also I went ahead and updated my own silly story. You helped me to finally think of a workaround as to how I was going to continue after 3 years.

Totally nailed it too.

Please update soon!