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The Adventures of Forced Companions Daycare: Fallen

STAR WARS: The Old Republic > English > Community Content > Fan Fiction
The Adventures of Forced Companions Daycare: Fallen

bright_ephemera's Avatar

11.25.2015 , 02:48 PM | #51
Spoilers for Ensign Temple's recruitment.

The children milling around outside daycare stop when a chunky speeder truck appears on the horizon. With much belching of smoke and rattling of parts it pulls up in front of the daycare building. The driver, a reedy fellow in a Rotworms jersey, hops off. He turns to NADIA GRELL.
DELIVERYMAN: Miss, I have a package here for a...he squints at his holo readout...Kerm Wall?
KHEM VAL: She is one of the children. Don't bother.
NADIA GRELL: I'm not a child.
KHEM VAL: You will deal with me.
THE DELIVERYMAN looks him up and down.
DELIVERYMAN: If it's all the same to you, I really don't have a problem with talking to someone who isn't you.
KHEM VAL: Tulak Hord would punish your insolence with death.
DELIVERYMAN: Yeah, but the trailer is keyed to my biometrics.
KHEM VAL, reluctantly: Proceed.
KHEM VAL turns to the assembled children, who by now have stilled and quieted, apart from the ones trying to sneak around to peek into the trailer.
KHEM VAL: Children, today you will celebrate your gratitude for still being alive.
KHEM VAL pauses and looks at BABY DARTH MARR. BABY DARTH MARR glares through his mask at KHEM VAL.
KHEM VAL: Or only mostly dead.
A heavenly smell emerges as the trailer opens. Inside are all the furnishings necessary to seat twenty-eight children, a ghost, a young Jedi, and a shadow one more, as KID LOKIN hops out to help.

The DELIVERYMAN, KID LOKIN, and NADIA GRELL set about unloading tables. BABY BROONMARK spreads table cloths by jumping onto the end of each one and, relying on static cling, shuffling down the table dragging the end with him. The more responsible children, policed by BABY ELARA, take the broad vats and plates of food and start arranging them.
BABY GAULT, to BABY MAKO: Can I interest you in a fine hat?
BABY GAULT takes one of the leafy cornucopia centerpieces and balances it on his horns to illustrate. KHEM VAL sweeps it off his head and back onto the table.
BABY GAULT: Jeez, just trying to get into the holiday spirit of entrepreneurism.
KHEM VAL: Thanksgiving Day is not about entrepreneurism.
BABY GAULT: Every day is about entrepreneurism, Mr. Khem Val.
BABY MAKO, soothingly: I thought it was a good hat.
BABY GAULT: Enough to pay for it?

KID LOKIN hesitates over the two-person carry of a tremendous turkey or possibly larger fauna. His eyes dilate as he stares at its crackling, juicy majesty.
BABY KIRA: Hungry much?
KID LOKIN: Maybe I'd better go vegetarian today.

BABY TANNO VIK: Don't put the chocolate cake near me. I'm allergic. Just bring over the pumpkin pie...and the cheesecake...yep, and the blueberry one...just keep 'em coming.
BABY ELARA: No sampling!
BABY TANNO VIK: This isn't sampling. It's digging in at full speed.

KHEM VAL, to the group in general: Be grateful that these are not the dining halls of Yn and Chabosh, where acolytes fought to the death for the honor of getting seconds.
BABY KIRA: It's not a dining hall at all. It's outdoors.
KHEM VAL, leaning down: Also be grateful I tolerate nitpickers.

BABY RUSK brings his action figure squad to the table.
BABY RUSK: Oh, no! There aren't enough chairs for you guys!
BABY ASHARA: You could stack them next to your plate so they don't take up much space. Just don't feed them, they might find a way to die.
BABY RUSK: Whew. Good thing you were here for tactical advice.

BABY SKADGE heaps food onto his plate. He then relieves BABY VECTOR and BABY TEMPLE of their plates and starts heaping more food.
BABY VECTOR: This is not harmonious.
BABY SKADGE: No, but it's tasty.
BABY SKADGE: Make me, runt!
BABY TEMPLE squinches up her face and raises a hand. An itty-bitty Force push knocks BABY SKADGE in the nose.

BABY SKADGE, gingerly pushing BABY TEMPLE's plate back to her: Here you go.
BABY TEMPLE looks furtively around. Nobody else seems to have noticed.
BABY VECTOR: We will not tell anyone.
BABY TEMPLE: "We" being only one of you. Right?

BABY DOC: Listen, guys, I'm very concerned about the nutritional value of this feast. It's full of...uh...fats! And calameries.
KHEM VAL: Calories.
BABY DOC: Exactly. For safety you'd better bring the turkey over here. It's all right, I can get rid of it for you. Don't panic, baby.
NADIA GRELL: I'm not a baby.
BABY DOC: Figure of speech, babe.
BABY DOC: Uh, never mind.
BABY THARAN: You make an excellent point about nutrition, though. How many species here can actually derive benefit from this - he eyes the lavish spread - limited quantity of food? Has a dietitian vetted this?
MY LITTLE HOLIDAY: It looks like something worth giving thanks for to me.
BABY THARAN: Yes, my dear, but you don't eat.

BABY QYZEN FESS goes rocketing down the center of the long tables, touching every single plate and tub of food.
BABY RISHA: Ew. How can you possibly get points before the Scorekeeper for things that can't even move?
BABY QYZEN FESS is already long gone.

BABY MAKO taps her cybernetics.
BABY MAKO: Hey, Theron? You guys getting any of this?
BABY THERON: Well, Mr. Teeseven just handed out tiny pies and Miss SCORPIO has shut down for the day. I donít know how much more grateful it gets.

BABY ZENITH: Hey. Guss. Want to be my taster?
BABY GUSS: I like tasting.
BABY ZENITH: Great. Sample everything here so I can see if you die after eating it.
BABY GUSS's mouth falls open.
BABY ZENITH: Somebody's got to do it.
KHEM VAL: The food is not poisoned.
BABY ZENITH: Just saying. Trust, but get somebody less important than you to verify.

BABY ANDRONIKOS: Wasn't expecting to see you all the way over here, Iresso.
BABY IRESSO: Jorgan can't yell at me if I'm two tables down.
BABY JORGAN, from two tables down: I heard that, soldier!

BABY QUINN was late to the seating.
BABY QUINN: I don't want to sit next to an anarchist.
BABY KALIYO: I don't want to sit next to a walking tactical disaster. We all have problems.
BABY QUINN: And I don't want to sit next to another anarchist.
BABY BLIZZ: [incomprehensible jabbering]
BABY QUINN: Does anyone understand what he's saying?
BABY AKAAVI, from across the table: Yes.
BABY QUINN: Oh. Must be an alien thing.
BABY QUINN makes a face and sits down between BABY KALIYO and BABY BLIZZ. Seconds later he sits up straight and slaps BABY BLIZZ's hand away from his standard-issue Imperial blaster.
BABY QUINN: No using my stuff for Jawa tomfoolery!
BABY KALIYO, smiling: Maybe if you'd paid attention in time to find a safer place to sit.
BABY QUINN: I could probably have planned this better.

The children are just about ready to start. BABY CORSO is sitting in front of a gelatinous mound of cranberry jelly. BABY JAESA sits beside him.
BABY CORSO, reaching for the serving spoon and moving it slightly toward BABY JAESA: Here. Ladies first.
The cranberry jelly glistens. It smells of fruit and happiness.
BABY CORSO, hand spasming on the spoon: Ladies...first...
BABY JAESA: You doing all right there?

BABY VETTE climbs up on the table to reach a vat of gravy for her mashed potatoes. She slips on a tuft of BABY BROONMARK fur, accidentally bumping BABY RUSK's stack of action figures. The whole pile falls over into the corn bowl.
BABY RUSK: No! My squad!
BABY TORIAN: They should be fine after you dry them out.
BABY RUSK: I would expect you of all people to understand the sacrifices of our troops.
BABY TORIAN: Being covered in wet corn doesn't really damage your honor.
BABY RUSK: No one understands being a soldier.

BABY ELARA stands up and taps her sippy cup with her spoon. It doesn't make much noise.
BABY JORGAN: Hey! Listen up!
The table quiets.
BABY ELARA: I just wanted to say, to found family! Three cheers!

Happy American Thanksgiving!
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Vesaniae's Avatar

11.25.2015 , 03:00 PM | #52
I lost it at "Kerm Wall." Happy Food Day.
There's always lightning.

Abvora's Avatar

11.25.2015 , 04:35 PM | #53
What a great post! It's nice to see the kids gets a break from Bad Things for once (though I still find Bad Things funny).

Happy Thanksgiving!

bright_ephemera's Avatar

11.28.2015 , 11:05 AM | #54
Ah, returning to the grind out playing, I guess!

NADIA GRELL: And if you focus very clearly right between your hands, you can start to feel the Force moving you.
BABY ASHARA: You mean it controls our actions?
NADIA GRELL: Partially. But it also obeys your commands. At least, that's what Master Satele told me when I called her for advice yesterday.
KHEM VAL: Nadia.
NADIA GRELL cranes way, way up to look at KHEM VAL.
NADIA GRELL: Yes, Mr. Khem Val?
KHEM VAL: This is the first time I have seen the children try to educate one another.
NADIA GRELL: Iím not a child.
KHEM VAL: Curious, just the same.
BABY KIRA looks shifty. BABY JAESA looks indecisive. BABY ASHARA glares defiantly. BABY GUSS tries to hide behind BABY KIRA.
NADIA GRELL: I just thought, since weíre stuck where we canít leave but we canít go insideÖ
KHEM VAL: Nobody has tried teaching anybody anything since T7-01 expelled us.
NADIA GRELL: Well, then thereís things for all of us to learn.
BABY ASHARA: But mostly Force users.
BABY GUSS nods emphatically from behind BABY KIRA.
KHEM VAL: I will not interfere. Especially if you have to go up against Darth Marr.
NADIA GRELL: If I am out-tutored by a guy who is actually dead, I will hang up the Jedi robe and go beÖthinks about itÖa politician?
KHEM VAL: Darth Marr is a formidable politician, too.
NADIA GRELL: How Ďbout a nice person, huh? He got that locked up too?
KHEM VAL: No, not even slightly.
NADIA GRELL: There. I can do something he doesnít.

BABY THARAN: Corso, would you like to be my assistant?
BABY CORSO points at the purple plastoid pony standing beside BABY THARAN.
BABY CORSO: I thought My Little Holiday was your assistant.
MY LITTLE HOLIDAY: Oh, I am! But we need somebody with moving parts to pick up materials.
BABY CORSO: Okay, sure. Here, Iíve got something that might help.
BABY CORSO shyly produces a sleek silver foam dart blaster with racing stripes painstakingly painted on it.
BABY THARAN: A blaster! Are you crazy?
BABY CORSO hesitates before making the return inquiry that compulsive politeness requires.
BABY CORSO: Are you?
BABY THARAN: No! I just want to do science!
BABY CORSO, peering at BABY THARANís carefully cobbled-together lab bench, which mostly consists of an old shingle propped up on rocks and sprinkled with odd mechanical parts scavenged from the road nearby: It looks pretty complicated.
BABY THARAN: Science is very complicated. Thatís why Iím great at it.
MY LITTLE HOLIDAY: Youíre so smart, Tharan!
BABY CORSO: SoÖIím the assistant and sheís the moral support?
BABY THARAN: An admirable breakdown. Now go find me a green liquid. Itís critically important to the lab setup.
BABY CORSO: Wait, what do you want the liquid to be?
BABY THARAN: Green. Obviously. Itís Science. Get to it.
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Lunafox's Avatar

12.01.2015 , 04:09 PM | #55
LOL Nadia, trying to compete with Darth Marr. Give it up doll lol. Enjoyed my time in the daycare as always.
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bright_ephemera's Avatar

12.03.2015 , 07:30 AM | #56
Nadia's fascinating because you get the impression she is crazy strong. Of all the companion romance letters, hers is the only one to say she can still sense you out there. Makes you wonder how she'll grow up...of course, first she's got to deal with Baby Darth Marr.

BABY TALOS toddles up to the corner where KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING sits on his tiny walker in his terrarium.
BABY TALOS: Fascinating! The environment of the terrarium has been preserved since pre-invasion times! As neutral Hutt territory it may be a cultural treasure trove of the past!
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: That treasure trove is mine, squirt.
BABY TALOS: But think of the greater knowledge to be gleaned by-
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING, bitterly: Stealing my stuff?
BABY TALOS: Uncovering!
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: Well, if you uncover my terrarium I can take my walker out and take over again.
BABY TALOS: Oh. This might be too dangerous.
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: I can offer you the fabulous wealth of the Hutt Cartel.
BABY TALOS: I have a feeling if I got any wealth Pierce would just beat me up and take it.
BABY PIERCE, from next to the toybox: I have NO IDEA where you got that notion. Please, continue with the wealth-gathering.
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: You will have powerful allies in the Hutt Cartel.
BABY TALOS: Can they get me more artifacts?
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: Iím not saying they wonít.
ASSISTANT SENYA: I doubt Karagga has the means to back up his promises.
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: How do you know? You donít even live here.
ASSISTANT SENYA: Talos, ask him for a small advance as proof of his goodwill.
BABY TALOS: You can keep lying to me if you want to draw down the wrath of the Imperial Reclamation Service.
BABY TALOS: Have you ever gotten an archaeologist mad?
BABY TALOS: You would know.
ASSISTANT SENYA: Karagga, if you keep trying to subvert the children Iím going to have to cover up your cage.
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: Consider my offer. I am, after all, the Grand Mogul of the Hutt Cartel.
BABY TALOS: Itís really the cultural treasure trove of any old stuff in your cage that interests me.
KARAGGA THE UNYIELDING: When does Risha come back?
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bright_ephemera's Avatar

12.07.2015 , 07:46 AM | #57
Iím giving Rusk a hard time, but ideas just keep bubbling up.

BABY RUSK eyes his newly upgraded squad. The stuffed Ithorian, Arcona, and Whiphid have been wrapped in fluffy protective paper, the Selonian action figure had one arm replaced by an LED flamethrower, and the Gormak action figure stands two inches taller than before thanks to rocket boots.
BABY RUSK: I think you did a great job, Sergeant Blizz.
BABY BLIZZ: [incomprehensible jabbering]
BABY RUSK: Now. Itís time to test in battle.
BABY RUSK finishes posing his squad and goes looking for an Imperial to drag into a fight. BABY QUINN is practicing an intense parade rest, chest puffed out as he looks out across the Imperial-in-imagination landscape.
BABY RUSK: Hey. Quinn. This is Republic territory now.
BABY QUINN, not moving: I think youíll find you are mistaken.
Without further ado, BABY RUSK opens fire, lifting the Selonianís blaster arm and shooting a foam dart at BABY QUINNís back.
BABY QUINN: My word, youíve learned how to aim.
BABY QUINN turns slightly, looking dramatically over his shoulder.
BABY QUINN: But the terms have changed. Foam suction darts are no longer effective.
BABY RUSK: Thatís cheating!
BABY QUINN: I am altering the deal. Pray I donít alter it further.
BABY RUSK throws his assault cannon at BABY QUINN. It hits him square in the chest and rattles to the ground.
BABY RUSK: Alter this.
BABY QUINN: Ow! Yeah, wellÖ
BABY QUINN runs to the figurines and starts tearing off their protective coverings. BABY RUSK continues swinging assault cannons at him.
BABY QUINN, punching the Ithorian down: For the Empire.
BABY RUSK: Iím hitting you fair and square!
BABY QUINN, punching the Arcona down: For the Empire!
BABY RUSK: Quit it!
BABY QUINN, in an ecstasy of destruction, hits the stuffed Whiphid with the stuffed Ithorian.
BABY RUSK gathers up the Selonian and the Gormak. He swings them both at BABY QUINN, shatteringly hard.
BABY RUSK: Your sacrifice wonít be in vain, guys.
BABY QUINN pulls a foam suction dart out of the nearest assault cannon and starts poking BABY RUSK with it.
BABY QUINN: Point blank range! You donít stand a chance! Casualties, one hundred percent!
BABY RUSK: Darts donít do anything anymore. Remember?
BABY QUINN slows his attack.
BABY QUINN: ButÖI donít have any other weapons. I gave them to Blizz to upgrade.
BABY RUSK: Shouldíve thought of that before you turned off darts in a fight with my elite squad.
BABY QUINN: I could probably have planned this better.
BABY RUSK lowers his head and pokes BABY QUINN with his horns.
BABY RUSK: For the Republic!
BABY QUINN flops over, defeated, still clutching one dart.
BABY QUINN, from the ground, hopefully: Is it too late to make foam darts do damage again?
BABY RUSK: Yes. ĖIíd better go break the news to Zenith.
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Vesaniae's Avatar

12.07.2015 , 09:11 AM | #58
Oh, Baby Quinn. Even quoting Darth Vader wasn't enough to give you the victory. Really ought to start planning these things better...
There's always lightning.

alaurin's Avatar

12.07.2015 , 11:44 AM | #59
Did I just read right.......Rusk was victorious?! Another great installment as always!!

Lunafox's Avatar

12.07.2015 , 12:32 PM | #60
Poor Baby Quinn. He's better than that, he'd have taken Rusk down. He knows how to plan. I demand a sequel, with a rematch. Victory for Baby Quinn! For the Empire and all that. Fun stuff ^^
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omg Darth Lunafox in the house