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Asian parents


dermitni's Avatar


dermitni
02.14.2014 , 07:48 AM | #21
@leptir:
Sorry to say this but I had to smile as I read your posting; it just reminded me so much of how my own (European) father treated me when I was in your age. He used the exact same arguments and was afraid as well that playing computer games could become an addiction because: *clears throat*
"Computer games reward you without any real effort on your part (like getting good grades by learning hard for school)!"

He had a similar opinion on everything else I did for relaxation, like reading comics or watching TV. So I'd guess your father is as concerned about you having a good start in life (with a good education and good grades) as my father was.

I know that may not help you a lot but one way I dealt with that situation was to offer my father a bargain about when and how long I'd have my very own "free time" without him interfering (yeah, I was always a good diplomat when it came to handling people with determined personalities ). So I could read comics at evenings and had three hours on Saturday and Sunday to play computer games (but not on weekdays).

Overall, my father was very strict in his own beliefs and opinions, besides computer games and comics for example regarding homosexuals which he referred to as "sick people" at one time; however he later came around and accepted a lot of my personality traits. Today (20 years later) he has full confidence in my ability to make my own decisions and live with as well as handle the consequences. And he's now fine with me playing computer games as well.

But one very important thing that I learned from being the son of my father: The longer and more you desire something, the more enjoyment you'll have when you finally achieve it. And even today, when I have enough money to for example buy any DVD I want, anytime, I limit myself to a strict "leisure money" budget and don't spend any more money than that -- my own allowance, so-to-speak. So I still have months where I can't buy "everything, right away" and have to be patient until I have enough "leisure money" saved up.

In the end, I'm afraid you'll have to make the best of your current situation and develop an interest in things your father deems worthy to spend time on. And like others already wrote here, yes, I agree that your father only cares about you (in retrospect many things my own father said and did were an expression of his love and care). Todays world is not easy to live in and the better someone is prepared for it (with good grades and through that a good job) the less problems they'll have. So, please don't be too hard on your dad.

Oh, and no, you're not whiny, you're just a teenager without a protocol droid to help them communicate with their parents.
The Progenitor: Hran'orfon - Chiss Ascendancy Sniper Vidaar Amakiir - Imperial Honor Guard
Jung Ma: Lythe Vodaine - Jedi Healer