I want to say a thank you to all those who attempt to help me in game, seriously. I know your intentions are good.

But, its also an annoyance. If i need help, i'll ask for it. Most of the time you are either taking Exp, loot and/or objective targets from me. And i notice this is happening to a lot of people.

Please, if someone looks like they are handling things okay, leave them to it. If you really want to help, ask or wait to be asked. Otherwise help by casting buffs on players, or, if you see someone in a battle and their health is getting low, heal them (if you are capable). All of those things are no intrusive.

Otherwise if you are only 'helping' because of impatience when waiting for someone to defeat something or things that you need to get to or whatever, shame on you. Have a little patience.

I'm sure there are other posts about this out there, but it needed to be stated again.

Happy Gaming!

Companions have an annoying habit of wading into other player's fights. I don't know if they're getting caught in mob AoEs or something, but assistance of that kind is almost always unintentional. When it does happen, I set them to passive but then forget that I've done that until the next fight when I notice they're not helping. Bad dogs

Never had much of an issue with that, unless i have been aggroed alongside the other player. I can understand if someones companion jumps in. Its one of those things thats hard to control. Its when the player him or herself decides to join in too

This is how I operate. I respect everyone else's presence in the game. I place priority on mission progression over farming. If I am just farming I'll avoid the area being worked by those progressing a mission.

If I and the other person are both progressing missions, I'll let the other go first if they are there before me . If the mobs/mission objectives are limited I will wait on respawn if the other player is actively progressing- or head for a different area to work the mission.

I will not assist unless asked, or it is clear you will be defeated. Unless you are a guildie or other select few I will not group up or ask to group up. Chances are my chat will be turned off anyway.

If you are just standing there, I will move forward to complete my objectives since I have as much right to be there as you do. If you are there first I'll give you a chance, but I won't wait forever for you to finish making a sandwich, bio break, google search, talking on phone, etc. Most especially if the number of objectives available and amount needed to hit are close to equal. I'll give you the chance to click first- but you had better be doing it. If you just stand there- I will take it if i need it. Chances are you'll still get the 4 class buff from me if you are lacking any, regardless.

I understand you wanting to do things on your own. I agree. I'll leave you to do your thing and appreciate the same from everyone else. If you hit a mob or group first, they will be greyed out to me and you will not lose xp or loot to me even if I and/or my companion inadvertently get caught up in your fight If there are more mobs in the area then you can hit, I will get the others that aren't greyed out to me - if I need them - because I have a right to them. Again, I'll only do that if I need the objectives to progress my mission. I'll come back to the area later if all i am doing is farming.

If I have to go AFK, I find a way to 'park' my character somewhere out of the way, or anything else to make it apparent that I am not actively pursuing any objectives.

Yesterday I ran into an elite area in Nar Shaddaa to get a datacron and came across a guy fighting an elite mob.

I stopped to make sure he'd make it since it did seem a bit close but when I was sure he'd live I ran on.

Then I get a whisper sarcastically stating how nice it was of me to help instead of just staring.

I simply replied that I help if people need it, not otherwise.

He goes "so you have a policy of helping by not helping, how nice"

I sigh and just tell him I only help if people really need it.

Then he goes off on how I'm still arguing with him?!?!

I'm like "excuse me? who's arguing? and am simply told I'm still arguing.

At that time I told him what I thought of his behaviour, welcomed him to my ignore list and told him that if he didn't want a reply he shouldn't be sending pissed off whispers in the first place.

Later in the evening I jumped in and picked a patrolling strong mob off a guy running away with little or no health after his first fight - not thinking twice about it because if people really are in trouble, that's what I do. No thanks but that doesn't really matter.

At the same time I've been irritated when a sage/sorc jumps into my pack of alreday tagged mobs and blows them all over the place. Not enough to be rude, just sighing to myself.

What I'm trying to say (when done venting a bit ) - you're damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Can't please everyone, can only try and be as nice and helpful as you can.

If you attack an elite mob, and I join, I don't get exp nor drop, you will get it all and have mob dead faster.

problem?

even more, I want him dead since I need him for my quest. you are tank with healer pet, I'll damn help you, since I want him to respawn earlier. (and yes, I know inviting to groups will be even better but no thanks, to much talking, I prefer to wait for respawn)

Yesterday I ran into an elite area in Nar Shaddaa to get a datacron and came across a guy fighting an elite mob.

I stopped to make sure he'd make it since it did seem a bit close but when I was sure he'd live I ran on.

 

Then I get a whisper sarcastically stating how nice it was of me to help instead of just staring.

I simply replied that I help if people need it, not otherwise.

He goes "so you have a policy of helping by not helping, how nice"

I sigh and just tell him I only help if people really need it.

Then he goes off on how I'm still arguing with him?!?!

I'm like "excuse me? who's arguing? and am simply told I'm still arguing.

At that time I told him what I thought of his behaviour, welcomed him to my ignore list and told him that if he didn't want a reply he shouldn't be sending pissed off whispers in the first place.

 

Later in the evening I jumped in and picked a patrolling strong mob off a guy running away with little or no health after his first fight - not thinking twice about it because if people really are in trouble, that's what I do. No thanks but that doesn't really matter.

 

At the same time I've been irritated when a sage/sorc jumps into my pack of alreday tagged mobs and blows them all over the place. Not enough to be rude, just sighing to myself.

 

What I'm trying to say (when done venting a bit ) - you're damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Can't please everyone, can only try and be as nice and helpful as you can.

If you can't take an elite solo, you're doing something wrong >.>.

I too dislike people that think they are helping me out by taking my mobs away :<. I get really annoyed I don't even speak to those people and walk off in a huff.

If you attack an elite mob, and I join, I don't get exp nor drop, you will get it all and have mob dead faster.

problem?

even more, I want him dead since I need him for my quest. you are tank with healer pet, I'll damn help you, since I want him to respawn earlier. (and yes, I know inviting to groups will be even better but no thanks, to much talking, I prefer to wait for respawn)

Yeah, you're right but there will always be people like the OP that gets pissed at you, thinking you stole his xp.

No matter what you do someone will yell at you.

Makes it kinda pointless to make these kind of posts really, there is no "right" that suits everyone.

Oh well, I got to vent my frustrations a bit anyway.

And as for the guy I wrote about not being able to solo an elite - it was an elite area and I most likely walked in to the last stages of a bigger pull, not going to pick on him for that. He doesn't have to be a bad player just because he lacks people skills.

I must say, i have never raged at someone who has helped me in game. I know its generally done with good intentions. And sure, there are some cases where it doesnt matter who makes the kill. But sometimes when i'm in a heroic area/mission, i will either be grouped, or i wont. if im not, it means i am pushing myself. I like to solo sometimes to really get some gaming experience (coming up with new tactics etc...) So many times i have found it a lot of fun being in a situation where i am getting my arse handed to me, because i means i have to improvise and find a way of turning the tables.

It is VERY true that you cant please everyone. There are those out there that would welcome help, and thats okay. I'm trying to get across the point that there are a significant amount of people out there that dont need or want help. None of them are unsociable, they just like to take on the challenge themselves at times. As i said before, best thing to do is ask for help if you need it. Just type 'help' if someone is near, and watching you get destroyed. They will realise you actually need the help. Or, on the other side of the coin, ask if someone needs help.

I dont want to make out here that it is a cleand cut and dry situations, because as someone put in so many words, it isnt.

If you attack an elite mob, and I join, I don't get exp nor drop, you will get it all and have mob dead faster.

problem?

even more, I want him dead since I need him for my quest. you are tank with healer pet, I'll damn help you, since I want him to respawn earlier. (and yes, I know inviting to groups will be even better but no thanks, to much talking, I prefer to wait for respawn)

This. I await for for the original player to take off some of the mob's health, make sure the target is grey, and then assist. No loot, no exp and sometimes a thank you in return and they stay to assist me with taking down my respawned elite quickly.

I don't jump in unless someone looks like they are in trouble, but I have no issue with people rushing forward to help me, even if I haven't taken a scratch. Why? I'm in a role-playing game and I would no more expect someone to walk idly by if my character was being attacked in game as I would if I were being attacked on the street outside my house.

So to all those who do jump in regardless, a very sincere thanks. You make my game far more immersive than the player who ignores the fact I am being wellied on (literally or not) by a group of rabid sentients (though if they RP running away screaming like a girl's blouse, that's all good too ).

I'm pretty sure someone has already said this, but you don't loose exp, loot or anything at all if someone helps you kill a mob(unless, of course, you're teamed with them). If you hit it first, it's yours.

Whenever I do (lv 50) daily missions, people jump in to help me kill things. They do so because they either know me, or have heard of me from one of their guildies, and just want to be nice by lending me a hand to speed up my missions.

However, I don't lend a hand when leveling newbie characters unless someone asks me. The reason is because most of the people leveling are new players, and there's a high chance that they'll rage at me if I do. I do not wish to start trouble with anyone or stress anyone out...but I can't say I completely understand why some of them rage, besides not knowing that they wont loose anything if I help them.

This certainly isn't a cookie cutter situation. If, for some reason, we all decided to do this, someone else would be posting "Why doesn't anyone help me?" on the forums instead of this. Some people, for whatever reason, don't or can't ask for such help due to inability to mutli-task during combat, language barrier, or whatever. So just take it with a grain of salt and continue on.

We can't rely on someone using good judgement in this game any more than we can count on other drivers using good judgement on the road. Maybe there should be some sort of insurance policy we can take out in game. This is exactly why instancing is such a balancing act. While many rail against instancing, I've always been in favor of it. Especially in situations that require the destruction or gathering of an objective point. Otherwise we get those times where we are waiting for the objective point to respawn and there is literally a line waiting for the next guy. (and the inevitable line cutters).

If you attack an elite mob, and I join, I don't get exp nor drop, you will get it all and have mob dead faster.

problem?

even more, I want him dead since I need him for my quest. you are tank with healer pet, I'll damn help you, since I want him to respawn earlier. (and yes, I know inviting to groups will be even better but no thanks, to much talking, I prefer to wait for respawn)

your are a example of what the op is talking about. sorry for slowing you down a few secs in bh on the end boss for the area quest on my healer. (for me this is the most common occurrence i have seen.) when on my fresh 50s you guys just watch me but when i am on my bis dps/healer with a healer/dps companion having over 22k hp and better geared than you, you feel a need to shave a few secs off the kill now. go figure.

your are a example of what the op is talking about. sorry for slowing you down a few secs in bh on the end boss for the area quest on my healer. (for me this is the most common occurrence i have seen.) when on my fresh 50s you guys just watch me but when i am on my bis dps/healer with a healer/dps companion having over 22k hp and better geared than you, you feel a need to shave a few secs off the kill now. go figure.

are you annoyed some one speeds up your killing? you loose nothing and gaining time to do something else.

why is it so important to some people that every bit of hp from a mob must be taken by them? ego burst?

This is how I operate. I respect everyone else's presence in the game. I place priority on mission progression over farming. If I am just farming I'll avoid the area being worked by those progressing a mission.

 

If I and the other person are both progressing missions, I'll let the other go first if they are there before me . If the mobs/mission objectives are limited I will wait on respawn if the other player is actively progressing- or head for a different area to work the mission.

 

I will not assist unless asked, or it is clear you will be defeated. Unless you are a guildie or other select few I will not group up or ask to group up. Chances are my chat will be turned off anyway.

 

If you are just standing there, I will move forward to complete my objectives since I have as much right to be there as you do. If you are there first I'll give you a chance, but I won't wait forever for you to finish making a sandwich, bio break, google search, talking on phone, etc. Most especially if the number of objectives available and amount needed to hit are close to equal. I'll give you the chance to click first- but you had better be doing it. If you just stand there- I will take it if i need it. Chances are you'll still get the 4 class buff from me if you are lacking any, regardless.

 

I understand you wanting to do things on your own. I agree. I'll leave you to do your thing and appreciate the same from everyone else. If you hit a mob or group first, they will be greyed out to me and you will not lose xp or loot to me even if I and/or my companion inadvertently get caught up in your fight If there are more mobs in the area then you can hit, I will get the others that aren't greyed out to me - if I need them - because I have a right to them. Again, I'll only do that if I need the objectives to progress my mission. I'll come back to the area later if all i am doing is farming.

 

If I have to go AFK, I find a way to 'park' my character somewhere out of the way, or anything else to make it apparent that I am not actively pursuing any objectives.

I operate the exact same way.

Well, I wrote my novel as a reply yesterday, but I thought about an easy to use solution afterwards. How about maybe have a box to click that ties into your character nameplate that other players can see? It would illuminate a little box or other status that will tell everyone at a glance things like:

'Leave me alone I am a grump'

' Welcomes all help and social interaction'

or even a status that just says 'AFK.'

I don't know, I think just a simple colorcoded box would work, and would be spelled out if you hover your mouse pointer over another's nameplate. It would be a status you can click on the fly to change.

Maybe I will copy this into the suggestion box, but this could be useful tool for the OP and others for those times when they want to be left alone.

This all seems to have sidelined into social interaction, as well as the original point.

If i want to have a bit of fun with fellow players, and a bit of social interaction, i will group. (something i do often, i might add). However, there are times that, as i have stated, i want to solo because i want to push my limits and challenge myself. I cant do that with back up.

It wouldnt be so bad if someone joined me in a fight from the beginning. But, no. They always run along and take the last one or two guys who are part of the group i am fighting. They get the loot, experience, and, when they very rarely need it, bonus or objective item. Its always sods law too, that the group i am fighting is the perfect number for what i need to complete my objective/s. I'm a patient guy i will wait around for others to have free reign with whoever they are battling. Might buff or heal them if they need it. And sure, if they ask, i will help. But as someone else said, its a common occurance that if you do help you just get a mouthful. Me, i say thank you, every time. Even when they have butted in.

I get the roleplay side of things, and that would work if there were not so many people around (which is when the incident this post is about happens the most). I am a roleplayer. But sprinting by and taking out my last two guys is not roleplaying/truly helping. 9 times out of 10 it is impatience.

You know, thats why i started this post with the thank you's. Because i knew people would assume i was some grumpy git who has a go at anyone who does it. As i stated above, i dont. (see above)

Is it some macho thing that makes me want to defeat every one of the guys i am fighting? or something else?

No. As i said, i want the challenge of every squad i meet. Every elite. Just so i can hone my skills. And, because its an achievment to know that i did that on my own back.

...

 

'Leave me alone I am a grump'

Oh, I'm making a new guild. Either Grumps R' Us or Grumpy Old Men