I have bipolar and social anxiety so I never fit in.

I'm officially disabled and getting on disability so now the Internet will be

My only social outlet cuz I had to move to parents in another state

 

What are some tips to fit in? People are so mean to me online, if I ask

A question on fleet everyone just makes fun of me

If I say Anything in a chat room people are like "who said you could talk?"

 

I won't say everyone cuz there's some nice peep who have helped me

But seems like majortith people don't like me.

 

So how can I make them like me? I notice they rip on my spelling so I'm working on that.

But if I ask any question about the game I get ripped on so should I just find out stuff on my own? I like

To know what others are doing though.

Also I love chatting because i get so lonely irl

But whenever I say anything people are like "we didn't ask..."

 

I play Mmos to socialize and everyone irl hates me and i guess online too

I always knew I was not meant for this world, but I just

Can believe my curse even extends online!

Isn't I had enough I lost everything, do I have to suffer in my favorite game?

crappy situation, but i think just being aware of your awkwardness and not becoming bitter or jaded is your best bet.

 

what most people in your position do is just pretend they are better than everyone else and make fun of people that deviate from the supposed norms.

Edited June 27, 2012 by dipstik

well its not that they dont like you. there are alot of people online who like to put down other people to help themselves fell better.

 

if you want to fit in, i say be your self, if you have questions ask them. ignore people trying to upset you. i also sugest joining a guild as people are normaly friendlier to people in the same guild.

Unfortunately an MMO is the least friendly place to find people to socialize with, especially this community with all the me me first attitudes. However there is hope, as your leveling up random people will toss guild invites at you and I would suggest joining a guild and seeing what the players in it are like. There is nothing wrong with guild surfing until you find one that fits, but the most important thing to do to find one that you fit into is to be yourself. If you put up a front and try to be someone your not not only will you be unhappy but the other people in the guild won't know who you are as a person.

When people are rude / rip into you, don't respond right away. Spend a little time coming up with a witty comeback. Then next time somebody says the same thing (or something very similar... people can be startlingly unoriginal), then you'll have a snappy bit of repartee to bite them with... it takes practice, but everything does. Don't let them get to you. Just play the game to the best of your ability and let your actions do your talking for you.

 

You have to put yourself out there a little bit. When people are nice to you, friend them and say hi occasionally for no other reason (good idea to make sure they're not in a WZ / FP / operation first though). If you're lucky they'll start saying hi back sometimes... I know it's not easy and can be quite intimidating but there are plenty of people who are worth getting to know, and the rest... well they're easy to ignore if they're consistently rude / obnoxious. Some people take themselves way too seriously

If you are being sincere and honest, then you certainly have my compassion for the situation you find yourslef in.

I hope for nothing but better days ahead for you and your family. Mental and emotional problems are just as dibilitating as any major physical disability, in a lot of cases worse.

 

But concerning MMO's and fitting in, you are experiencing what most people have at one time or another.

MMO's are notorious for what you've mentioned. But think about it in reality. They don't know you or your situation they're just being MMO fools. And believe me, mmo's tend to bring the worse out in a ton of people.

But because of your delicate state of mind and emotions you "feel" like they know you and are making fun of who you are. Trust me, they're not. Can you see that these types of personalities do this to nearly everyone throughout their play time in the MMO. I"ve left MMO"s and returned months later, only to see familiar names in chat, still saying the most conrtoversial and slanderous things they've always said.

 

I'm on Ebon Hawke. I play a 50 Trooper named, "Trench"...Also a 44 Bounty Hunter named, Ranc. My legacy name is "Windtalker". Look me up if you want.

 

Take care of yourself, and all the best in the future.

I have bipolar and social anxiety so I never fit in.

I'm officially disabled and getting on disability so now the Internet will be

My only social outlet cuz I had to move to parents in another state

 

What are some tips to fit in? People are so mean to me online, if I ask

A question on fleet everyone just makes fun of me

If I say Anything in a chat room people are like "who said you could talk?"

 

I won't say everyone cuz there's some nice peep who have helped me

But seems like majortith people don't like me.

 

So how can I make them like me? I notice they rip on my spelling so I'm working on that.

But if I ask any question about the game I get ripped on so should I just find out stuff on my own? I like

To know what others are doing though.

Also I love chatting because i get so lonely irl

But whenever I say anything people are like "we didn't ask..."

 

I play Mmos to socialize and everyone irl hates me and i guess online too

I always knew I was not meant for this world, but I just

Can believe my curse even extends online!

Isn't I had enough I lost everything, do I have to suffer in my favorite game?

 

Just be yourself. Do you honestly want to worry about pleasing a large group of strangers?

 

I've been where you are, hoping to use the Internet and MMOs as a social outlet. Its a hobby, at best. If you want social interaction, you'd be MUCH better off with a social networking site, such as Facebook. There are probably groups with people just like you, who understand better than anyone else could, what your difficulties are.

 

One thing you can never hide online, is who you truly are in your heart. You eventually say something to betray your true self. So, if you have no luck IRL making friends, it will be even more difficult here, as people here are less prone to have patience with others, because they don't know your situation, and don't have the patience to listen to your explanations.

 

MMOs are not the place for positive social interaction, I'd get that thought out of your head right now, before it hurts you. Some people have positive social interactions in MMOs, but they are the exceptions, not the rule.

I would say just use the ignore function on those people. Cause if they cant act properly and come with answers on your question but instead make fun on your part, they dont deserve to have your attention.

 

I do wish there were some kind of "supervisor" lurking in the shadows and only steps in whenever people behave badly without anyone knows who it is, incognito sort of. Cause bullying or harrasment of any sort shouldnt be allowed anywhere.

Situational bud. There are kids... and adults unfortunately... out there that play MMOs strictly to grief players. The same thing goes for the real world. There are people that just want to make others have a difficult life. I feel sorry that you have encountered these people in an otherwise awesome game. Maybe try a change in scenery. By this I mean changing servers. I, for one, could care less about what disabilities someone has. A person is still a person whether or not they're disabled. Make a toon on Jedi Covenant and look me up. I'd be more then happy to level/quest/etc. with you. Just ignore the hateful/hurtful people. They all lose in the end.

 

EDIT: Also... why bother telling people about your situation if it just brings hate? I am just curious. It's no ones business but your own. I am curious to know what you're saying or doing that brings on this events.

Edited June 27, 2012 by Aharx

Tell them that you have their IP address which can track you're real address and you are on you're way to their house.

Then mention that you are just out of prison for murdering someone you met online. That will send a shiver up their spine.

 

Or just be yourself....

Tell them that you have their IP address which can track you're real address and you are on you're way to their house.

Then mention that you are just out of prison for murdering someone you met online. That will send a shiver up their spine.

 

Or just be yourself....

 

Suggesting that someone threatens another being is not really good advice, heh.

Greetings, AneeshS!

 

We just wanted to take a quick moment to say welcome to Star Wars™: The Old Republic™ and to our community. We're proud to say that we have a really great community here and we hope you enjoy being a part of it.

 

With that being said, we'd like to point you to our Server Group Forums where you can create threads looking for guilds or other like-minded players to group up with to strike down those pesky Jedi (or Sith!), and they can be found here.

 

Thanks again for being a part of our community, and may the Force be with you!

Keep ya head up man!!!

I suggest finding a guild with nice people in it. That would be the best route.

I have Aspergers, dysthymia and anxiety. I always find it helpful to find a small guild with mature players and slowly work on getting to know them. If you play Tomb of Freedon Nadd I can send you an invite, nice bunch. Edited June 27, 2012 by DiabloDoom

I have bipolar and social anxiety so I never fit in.

I'm officially disabled and getting on disability so now the Internet will be

My only social outlet cuz I had to move to parents in another state

 

What are some tips to fit in? People are so mean to me online, if I ask

A question on fleet everyone just makes fun of me

If I say Anything in a chat room people are like "who said you could talk?"

 

I won't say everyone cuz there's some nice peep who have helped me

But seems like majortith people don't like me.

 

So how can I make them like me? I notice they rip on my spelling so I'm working on that.

But if I ask any question about the game I get ripped on so should I just find out stuff on my own? I like

To know what others are doing though.

Also I love chatting because i get so lonely irl

But whenever I say anything people are like "we didn't ask..."

 

I play Mmos to socialize and everyone irl hates me and i guess online too

I always knew I was not meant for this world, but I just

Can believe my curse even extends online!

Isn't I had enough I lost everything, do I have to suffer in my favorite game?

 

I'm so sorry for what you are going through. Like you, I have problems with some of those things. I am getting on disability as well. Bipolar, Anxiety, OCD, ADHD, schizoaffective, they really threw the book at me. People who don't experience these things themselves can never truly understand how it makes you feel. Its like you're always on the outside looking in, wishing you could just be like the rest of the world.

 

To feel that crushing despair because you firmly believe that will never happen is one of the worst things in the world. We want to be able to log into a virtual world where none of things should matter, and when we experience the same garbage in-game it just reinforces the belief that we are beyond saving, that we just have no reason to exist. My advice to you is do not give up. We don't know the future, or what our lives will be like in five years. Keep up with treatment, take the meds, tell the docs what works and what doesn't. Don't get discouraged, you and I both know its a lengthy and infuriating process, and its worse because not many people understand what we are putting up with. People like to pidgeonhole us when they hear the word "bipolar". TV and movies have people believing we are crazy people who are angry one minute and calm the next. People, sadly, can be real morons.

 

My friend complained that I would make more money than him on disability while he works a full time job. I said my job is way harder than his, because I have to do it all night and all day. He laughed and asked what the hell do I do to earn it. I said I have to fight drug companies and charity care doctors and bad reactions to new meds, to have to struggle every single day to find something to tell myself to keep me going until tomorrow, that things can get better, just hang on another day. He basically said "so you sit around all day"

 

That's the kind of crap we put up with. Don't try to fit in. I would add you as a friend and play with you anytime, not because we are sort of kindred spirits, but because I think you seem cool enough to me. If you're on Ebon Hawk, friend me up. Dark Siders are Baltier, Calamus, and Artus. Repblics are...well, I can't remember their names.

Take care of yourself, my friend. Keep playing, and learn to tell people to simply...****.

Edited June 27, 2012 by cellavalo_valcyn
wrong word

I'm with you bro. just came from another thread supporting you and I will to.

I personally welcome you to come to the server Canderous Ordo, to send a message to Brimmer, on the Republic side; and we'll give you a home among friends.

Hey AneeshS,

 

its sad to read the response you have been getting on your server, i understand where you are coming from i may not be in the same situation as you are personally but i have seen this happen before and dont worry i got told off for for getting gear for my marauder and was called a ninja my response was to them i am only selecting armour for my character not looking to make money and it shut them up quick smart.

 

so just be yourself dont worry what others think of how you spell if you ask a question cause trust me i am almost level 50 and still asking questions.

 

If your playing on the oceanic servers come down to dalborra pm my toon Sythans and you can join up with our small guild that just started as we are wanting to be players of the game and just starting to get to know every member.

 

all the support in the world and if your not on my server hope you find the right guild that understands you and treats you with all the respect you deserve

I have bipolar and social anxiety so I never fit in.

I'm officially disabled and getting on disability so now the Internet will be

My only social outlet cuz I had to move to parents in another state

 

What are some tips to fit in? People are so mean to me online, if I ask

A question on fleet everyone just makes fun of me

If I say Anything in a chat room people are like "who said you could talk?"

 

I won't say everyone cuz there's some nice peep who have helped me

But seems like majortith people don't like me.

 

So how can I make them like me? I notice they rip on my spelling so I'm working on that.

But if I ask any question about the game I get ripped on so should I just find out stuff on my own? I like

To know what others are doing though.

Also I love chatting because i get so lonely irl

But whenever I say anything people are like "we didn't ask..."

 

I play Mmos to socialize and everyone irl hates me and i guess online too

I always knew I was not meant for this world, but I just

Can believe my curse even extends online!

Isn't I had enough I lost everything, do I have to suffer in my favorite game?

 

Hey there. I admire your courage to tell us about your situation. I just wanted to pop in and say that there are a lot of lovely people out here that play this game, as well as every other game. But just the same there is a decent amount of people who like to be mean and idiotic. I hope that you can learn to see that this is not because of you, and it isn't a problem with you. If anything, it is a flaw in their people skills, not yours.

 

Just by looking at the feedback you've received, I can tell that any of these fine people would welcome you into one of their guilds and help you assimilate to a comfortable gaming environment, because that is what I feel you might need. A guild that is filled with good people who want to enjoy the game and would have no problem answering your questions about it.

 

I wish you luck, friend. Please don't let others dictate your view on yourself. The way they act is not what makes you.

I can defiantly relate to what you are saying, as I am in a similar situation. The best advice I can give is don't change yourself to please others. Keep doing what your doing (like asking questions, etc) and if people are giving you trouble, just ignore them and put them in your ignore list. Also, like you said not everyone on the internet is mean. There are some diamonds in the rough and when you find those diamonds, try your best to make friends with them. For example, when I was trying to get the Orokeet egg in April, I mostly met people who were jack asses or morons, but every once in a while I met someone who was actually friendly (one of these people helped me get my egg and if it wasn't for him I would still probably be on Alderaan right now). Also, joining a guild helps too. I wish you the best of luck.

I may not be best for advice here but I wanted to let you know your not the only one out there struggling with these issues. I guess you could say when i read your post it was almost like looking in the mirror. I have also been struggling with mental/emotional disorders and often it slips out in a game weather you want it to or not. Can slip out among your friends or people you meet to.

 

Difference is I fortunantly started out on a server where most the peopel seemed decent. actualy helpful. There are guilds and people out there that are also willing to be helpfull.

 

And I guess I could say a tip. Talk to people who seem to be friendly ignore everyone else. it's not easy and I struggle as well mostly to the part that at times your faced with grouping with people you don't know. At times someone can be friendly but their not going to want to listen to what is going on rl because they come here to escape. For me I know this as well and struggle with it to but it is important to understand.

 

I rolled out first on an RP server Shien and fortunantly, having been online on different= communities a while I had a group of friends from another community that i joined with. Some them know me well enough that they will even send me a humored reminder to calm down lol While i know you may not have found that group and even when you do there may be some rough points it;s worth it to try to get to know a few people.

 

If you find a friendly face, talk to them. if their cool, add them to friends. generally what I do and I ignore most the general chat if I have a question I ask my friends first if I can because I know am more likely to get a less snarky response from them. If you do end up needing to use general chat for help, find that friendly person on there and talk to them. ignore the rest.

 

I can defiantly understand the struggle of having a mental and mood disorder in game though. It isn't easy even when you have some friends to hang out with and talk with. Lot people can't grasp the issue or how much it effects us. Or why it is making it's way in the game. but even if they can't it;s worth making the friends and sometimes you may find some who actually are dealing with some similar situations.

 

Am not sure if what i wrote here is very clear or understandable. I tend to have some issues far as communicating clearly as well especially when got several thoughts muddled together trying to organize them well enough to communicate it effectively lol

 

 

I can say RP servers I think are generally more friendly as well, I started on Shien but have moved to Ebon Hawk with the transfers, the larger community has been more difficult to handle but if you have any issues things like making a second tab to put general chat in and removing it from the general tab has helped me. Makes it difficult for me to find pugs as i don;t check it enough and am not comfortable myself putting myself out to post something up to look for one. But less stressful going about my business especially on fleet station.

 

You may not have that same issue but hopefully good tip if need it.

Edited June 28, 2012 by OdanBaruq

I have bipolar and social anxiety so I never fit in.

I'm officially disabled and getting on disability so now the Internet will be

My only social outlet cuz I had to move to parents in another state

 

What are some tips to fit in? People are so mean to me online, if I ask

A question on fleet everyone just makes fun of me

If I say Anything in a chat room people are like "who said you could talk?"

 

I won't say everyone cuz there's some nice peep who have helped me

But seems like majortith people don't like me.

 

So how can I make them like me? I notice they rip on my spelling so I'm working on that.

But if I ask any question about the game I get ripped on so should I just find out stuff on my own? I like

To know what others are doing though.

Also I love chatting because i get so lonely irl

But whenever I say anything people are like "we didn't ask..."

 

I play Mmos to socialize and everyone irl hates me and i guess online too

I always knew I was not meant for this world, but I just

Can believe my curse even extends online!

Isn't I had enough I lost everything, do I have to suffer in my favorite game?

 

I am sorry for the way some people have acted towards you. Even though some people will say this is the internet that is no excuse for rude behavior. People need to remember there is a person behind that character and you should strive to treat that person like you would if you met that person in real life.

 

With that said, there are nice and respectful people in the game just normally they rarely will say a lot on general chat for obvious reasons. I suggest you try looking for a guild and there is a site that can help you find a guild with the type of people you would want to be around. http://www.swtor.com/community/showthread.php?t=3189

 

For the most part try to ignore the ones that are rude. In my book they are jerks and you are better off without them. When people act like that remember they are the ones losing out . They lose out by not getting to know you.

 

I wish you the best of luck and take care.

I agree fully with what one of the posters said: don't try to fit in. You're different, embrace that and be yourself. MMOs seem to be a gathering place for people with a wide variety of so-called mental disorders, from depression (myself) to autism to schizophrenia. One of my best friends ingame (for years already, we came over together from WoW), is an autist.

 

The reason he likes me so much, is that I treat him no different than anyone else. I don't put up with him if he's being annoying or obnoxious, I just tell him flat out. I do make allowances for his condition. I am mindful of the fact that he doesn't get sarcasm (unfortunately, my usual MO), which doesn't mean I'm not sarcastic towards him, I just realize he probably won't get it. It does make for very funny conversations sometimes, he's so Sheldonesk. I am also mindful of his unending chattyness, however, if it gets on my nerves, I tell him in no uncertain words to shut up. Which he does... for like 5 mins, lol. Maybe the most important thing I'm mindful of, is that he doesn't get subtle hints. I hardly ever beat around the bush, but with him I tend to be outright blunt. He appreciates all that, because, as he says himself, he may lack some people skills by nature, but he's working hard to acquire them by nurture.

 

The reason I like him so much, is that he's highly intelligent, funny as hell (sometimes unintentionally) and a very loyal friend. He also made me realize that I shouldn't take my own (rather good) people skills for granted

Edited June 28, 2012 by Sauska

I am also mindful of his unending chattyness, however, if it gets on my nerves, I tell him in no uncertain words to shut up. Which he does... for like 5 mins, lol.

 

Had to lol at this. I am the same way with people I feel comfortable with, and if I get told to shut up by someone I respect I literally will, it takes the verbal wind out of me so to speak.