The Female Gamer - Are you guys not over this yet?

"Hey baby, what's your spec?"

*waggles eyebrows suggestively*

Well one thing is for sure, Guild Masters and Officers get all the chicks, if you are not either of those you are not hooking up in the Interwebz.

TL;DR?

After more than a decade of MMOs OP is still surprised by antisocial and moronic bahavior online.

First time I played a female character was in City of Heroes (or actually Villains as it was a villain). I always put bios on my characters and some random guy told me he loved the one I made for a character. I said thanks. He asked if he could make a character that would be my character's sibling and would I mind. I said go for it seeing how I thought odds of running into him again was slim and none. But because of that, I thought cool idea making characters siblings so made my character have his younger brother join the heroes. When Villains hit, I figured they needed a sister.

And low and behold, the "sister" got hit on. Most understood to stop when I said they were so going down the wrong path. However, while with the VG running our STF saturdays (do nothing but TFs all day), a guy wanted me to spend time with him. I said first "busy" but he wouldn't stop. So told him "Do you have any clue who I might be?" Again, the stupid with him was strong so I played on it. I finally told him to meet me Grandville where I'd be after the TF was over. He was in his mid 20's. Told him to go to the other side of GV. Hours went by as we did 2 TFs and he was still sending whispers even though I stopped answering. When we got done, I told my VG to watch for Broadcast to have an "accidental" mistell. So went to where he waited for hours.

He said: I died like 20 times waiting on you. And had to keep coming back.
I said: Sorry about that.
He said: I can always wait for a lady.
I said ("accidental" mistell into Broadcast): Since you want it so bad, (the guy's character name), I need to tell you I get paid 1 million creds to hot chat.

My VG group started making fun of him in broadcast until he logged out.

This is one of the major reasons why i have a strict policy of not guilding people under the age of 21. Our guild leader might disagree with me but I am one of the person's responsible for inviting new toons. Here's a list of pre-req's and tests I run people through to make sure they're what we're looking for. I understand the person in question was a pug but none-the less i'm talking about straight up guild guidelines for my own personal use.

1:) my guild uses vent they must have vent and USE it and have a mic, this prevents little tweens from lying about their age as 9 times out of 10 you can't fake maturity or the tone of your voice.

2:) We only guild people over the age of 21 ( either actual age or maturity level) this also prevents any lawsuits that may happen if one of the kiddos decides to use his age as a shield after he says some rude things trying to "be cool".

3:) I only guild people whom i have ran fp's or ops or pvp'd with on a regular occasion, yes i'm aware of the possible good players I could be missing out on and this is unfortunate but also a risk i'm willing to take to avoid little kids in my guild. again no offense to those of you born post 1990 but sorry we're an ADULT guild.

4:) we don't discriminate against religion, creed, sexual orientation, sex, race, or anything else. We're an adult guild and only discriminate against the younger population in terms of getting membership in guild.

5:) I take great pride in maintaining an adult casual atmosphere in our guild and I do not want it ruined by a loudmouth regardless of age and we are not shy about enforcing this rule by booting someone out of guild.

These are some of the guidelines i follow so that all of our guildies male and female alike don't have to worry about uncomfortable situations. Just my 2 cents. I"m sorry some douche bag got an enraged epeen from hearing a woman's (your) voice and decided that meant it was ok for him to pursue you romantically. Take heart though not all of us dudes are like that, in fact most of us have girlfriends whom play the game and try to maintain a friendly atmosphere for all. Take it easy and I hope you never have to deal with that situation again. -Ifolad -Ifo -ifo'lek -rhodea Guild Operations Officer for The Elder Alliance Militia on The Shadowlands server

Surprisingly in about 7 years of my MMO time, I haven't really had this happen. Closest I can think of is a guy that would sometimes do rated BGs in WoW told me I had a cute voice. This particular raid group was predominantly full of gay guys though other than me, my boyfriend and one other straight guy, so.... *shrug*

I guess I'd flip the question around...are female gamers still surprised at male behavior? Think of all the poor guys that have girlfriends that hate when they play games, I'm sure a girl gamer sounds like a great deal.

And you created a thread why? Not too be rude but this draws even more attention to you. If your goal is to simply get beyond this issue, then why create a thread about it and bring all the attention back to you?

My personal opinion is that a lot of lonely guys play MMOs and aren't good at flirting irl.
Most gamer guys would like to be in a relationship with a gamer chick, but they are somewhat rare.
Add that together and lonely guys on MMOs hit on gamer girls and flirting is easier for a socially awkward person when it's not face to face.

Sorry but that's how it is and I don't see it changing anytime soon.
Lonely socially awkward guys need love too.... just saying

The funny part is when you're a dude playing a female character and other male players try to flirt with your character without even thinking that you're a dude...very amusing.

Unfortunately creeps like that show up when you use voice chat in video games. Just remove them from the call and group and you're set, simple as that. I'm sure your group leaders will understand too and remove them.

I've had that problem, too.

I usually have a balance of male and female characters.
Back in SWG, I even made it a point to alternate boy-girl-boy-girl for each of my accounts until they gave us two characters per server and then decided it was too much trouble.

I RP with some characters and others I don't but I never pretend to be a RL female.
In fact, unless we're friendly enough to interact outside of the game, I'm not going to discuss anything about myself anyway.

It was in the early days of SWG that I got a harsh lesson in the fact that boys will hit on anything with digital breasts.
I had two characters that I decided would never speak OOC under any circumstances and I really enjoyed the challenge of translating "game" talk to and from "living world" usage.
I had devised backgrounds and motivations for each of them so I could act the way I thought each of them would react in any given situation.
One character was male and the other was female.
As fate would have it, the female crafter turned out to be more fun to play than the male bounty hunter.

Generally it wasn't a huge problem because gathering resources, crafting, and managing a business didn't require lots of interacting with other people beyond taking and delivering special orders.
But every now and then when I'd hang out in the social hubs, at least one guy would try to flirt with me.

Sometimes a girl just wants to have a drink with friends or relax, you know?
I was also not interested in exploring the whole RP relationship thing as part of my gaming experience so I would do my best to politely brush them off.
They don't always get the hint, though, and some are much more persistent than others.
Plus, never speaking OOC means I can't just say, "Dude, I'm a dude and not interested in cybering with you so take a hike."

After about 6 months I had a moment of inspiration about how I could get rid of these people and not violate the character background I had created: "Sir, while I am flattered by your compliments, I feel that it is only fair to tell you that I'm not particularly interested in romantic overtures from someone who possesses ...uhm... equipment such as yours."

Yes, some of them thought I was referring to the items in their inventory.

That's also why I made all my Entertainer characters male.