Synopsis: In a series of short archives, a Sith Warrior reflects on how her choice between ambition and love changed the fate of the galaxy. Heavy on romance for you Malavai Quinn fans. 1st person POV. Also posted over at fanfiction.net if that's a little easier to follow. Story is officially COMPLETE. Please let me know what you think if you manage to make it all the way to the end. *And YES, there are SPOILERS though I ended up tweaking a few things to the actual SW storyline.*

 

 

My grip tightens around your throat. My fingers rip through flesh even as violent convulsions rack through your body. Mouth agape. Eyes bulging. My heart pounds with yours, and I inhale the acrid scent of desperation whooshing outward as you scream. The scent of rage and fear suffuses the air around us. It fills me.

 

There is an energy all around us pulsing in time to those who are strong with the Force. Surrendering to this darkness allows us to transcend the boundaries that limit ordinary men. We see not with our eyes; we move not with our bodies. We are pure energy rippling across the galaxy in consummate ecstasy.

 

On the night I murdered my mother, this energy surged through my veins for the very first time. I was old enough to recognize her failings as a parent but still naive enough to believe I could secure my standing in the world by entering into an ill-fated contract with black-market dealers: my mother's liver in exchange for a week's supply of food.

 

In an alley on Nar Shaddaa, her hands batted against mine in a futile attempt to break free from my grasp. She'd merely been an easy means to an end. The kill nothing but a simple business transaction to help fill my aching belly. The plan was simple: kill, dissect, profit.

 

But memories of how she used and abused me filled me with sudden rage. I bounded her, gagged her, then sliced her from chest to groin. I watched my mother's heart, laid bare inside her chest, stubbornly cling to life.

 

The jarring juxtaposition of life and death struck me, and in that moment, a boundless exaltation seized me. Electricity licked my skin. A surge of heat shot through me. My awareness expanded a hundredfold, and I felt the life and breath of every living thing around me, including the feverish delirium that was my mother's rapidly fading consciousness.

 

I died with my mother that day. Drowned with her as a black void overcame us both. When I awoke, only darkness remained, and its presence continues to guide me even long after I left for Korriban to follow the ways of the Sith.

 

One day, I may grant you the gift of life through death. Embrace it. Accept it. In your final moments, as you take in your last breath, you will finally know what it means to be alive.

 

You will finally know what it means to be Sith.

Edited March 24, 2012 by Arianwin
Added "Complete" to Title

 

"This is only the beginning." Darth Baras' undulating voice washed over me. "As my apprentice, the galaxy will bend before you."

 

I clasped his hand and knelt to receive his blessing. Master, oh master! The obvious pleasure he felt in choosing me to be his right hand thrilled me to no end. I shivered as his fingers stroked my hair. Sparks crackled against my flesh, and I shuddered at the thought of such immense power joining with mine.

 

His fingers slid down my jaw, wordlessly demanding that I surrender to him. His hand dipped lower until they traced the hollowed contours of my collarbone. I wept with happiness knowing that his touch branded me as his.

 

Without warning, his energy slammed into mine, overwhelming me with the power of his Force. Something snapped deep inside me, and white-hot pain seared through my side. I welcomed the pain because I knew it pleased him. My body was his to break, my life his to command.

 

I met his gaze even as my vision grew cloudy. Rage. Passion. Hatred. Ecstasy. Every emotion known to man danced across my consciousness. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. My energy bled into his, filling both our bodies with pure unadulterated ferocity.

 

Then…nothing. Darth Baras broke away from me, severing our link. Nudging me back onto my feet, he chuckled. "Bravo, Apprentice. I see you may indeed become one of the strongest Sith in the galaxy."

 

Baras dismissed me with a wave of his hand. I stumbled out of his chambers, knowing without a doubt that the imprint of his vile touch would always mark me as his. The subtle hum of his presence inside my mind would haunt me forever.

 

It was a small sacrifice, I reminded myself, in the greater scheme of things.

 

My lips curled upward. Master, oh master! Your inevitable destruction will be the catalyst that will forever change the fate of this world.

 

The palms of my hands pressed against the smooth surface of the control panel in front of me. I could feel the hum of the ship shift subtly as she shook herself free from her autopilot settings.

 

Leaning forward, I felt the ship respond to my movements as if her wings and hull were but a simple extension of my body. I marveled at her power. Fury was built with remarkable precision, every nut and bolt painstakingly designed to maximize her agility, range of firepower, and speed.

 

I still remember the first time I boarded her. Oh! How my heart pounded as my hands skimmed over every surface of her interior, memorizing her form until I knew her body as well as my own. Her curves were a magnificent display of grace and beauty merged with strength and power.

 

Even now, as we soared through the vast emptiness of space together, her energy tickled the tip of my nose as it so often did, and the angry vibrations that continually hummed in the back of my head softened to a dull roar.

 

For a moment, I forgot who I was. My awareness left my body behind and flowed into her graceful metallic form. We dipped our wings, dancing among the stars, enjoying this fleeting moment of freedom we so seldom get to experience.

 

"Incoming transmission from the Imperial Holonet," TV-R8 interrupted. The metallic twang of its voice grated on my nerves.

 

I pinched the bridge of my nose as the throbbing ache in my head came rushing back in full force. The thrill of power reasserted itself deep inside me. Awareness flowed back into my veins. My ears popped and my hearing cleared as if I had resurfaced from deep underwater.

 

I was careful to mask the expression of contempt on my face before I waved for TV-R8 to open our communications channel. The Empire waited for no one, least of all for me.

 

A hologram of Captain Corsav flickered before me. "A nearby transport carrying Imperial military supplies has been intercepted by a fleet of Republic fighters."

 

"Send me the coordinates," I ordered. The details of this skirmish meant little to me. In my mind, there was only victory, everything else was irrelevant.

 

TV-R8 handled the rest of the conversation and uploaded the coordinates to the astrogation console. As we approached our destination, my droid hailed our allies.

 

Without warning, Republic fighters appeared out of nowhere. Bright lights flashed. Chaos erupted.

 

"Shields up," I shouted. "Let's show those Republic scum what a Sith can do."

 

Fury eagerly strained against my hands as I veered her sharply to the left. A well-timed missile launch scattered the Republic's attack formation. Two fighters crashed into one another.

 

An alarm blared from inside the ship, and I braced myself for the hard hit from behind. Fury bucked as I pulled her nose up hard. She soared fast and furious over the attacking fighter in one smooth motion. As soon as I saw our target in front of us, she righted herself.

 

I squeezed the trigger.

 

We blew past the remains only to discover a pair of fighters had locked onto the transport just up ahead. With no time to spare, I urged Fury onward even as I sprayed a continuous stream of blaster fire over everything that moved.

 

Death and destruction rained down on the Republic forces. The bloated body of a Republic officer bounced off Fury's hull with a loud thud. I could feel the vibrational patterns of the galaxy violently recoil against one another as we took the lives of hundreds of soldiers in the span of minutes.

 

I laughed. Fury purred beneath me.

 

The fight was over as quickly as it began. The transport reached its destination safely, and we soared away before they could send their thanks.

 

Through strength, I gain power.

Through power, I gain victory.

Through victory, my chains are broken.

 

Reciting the Sith code so soon after battle fed my blood lust. It felt good, and my fingers stroked the control panel in time to the ancient mantra.

 

Closing my eyes, I sank back into Fury's waiting embrace.

Edited January 31, 2012 by Arianwin
Changed a word for better flow

not bad. i hope you'll continue. maybe with some quinn?

Next chapter. I promise.

 

Heh. I just read your profile signature. THAT HAD BETTER BE AN ACTUAL QUOTE from Quinn because I swooned so bad. Haven't finished the game yet...

Edited February 5, 2012 by Arianwin
Added more text to reply

 

The first time I met Lieutenant Malavai Quinn, I loathed him.

 

His no-nonsense demeanor and impeccably pressed uniform told me everything I needed to know. He was like all the others. Bureaucratic. Spineless. The kind of man who fought in the name of the Empire but left the dirty work for others.

 

I leaned against the doorway of his command center. My eyes flickered over him, taking in the way he moved. His posture ramrod straight. His chin held high. The deep timbre of his voice never wavered even as he reprimanded one of his soldiers. My lips curled in disgust when I noticed the immaculate shine of his military-issued boots.

 

The unmistakable hint of approval in my master’s voice when he spoke of Quinn confounded me. With no political influence to speak of, Quinn was useless to our plans, and yet somehow he managed to worm his way into Baras’ good graces. I vowed to myself I would determine why. If Baras considered Quinn one of his allies, I dared not overlook this opportunity to turn one of his trusted advisors against him.

 

“If that’s your best, you’re useless to me.” Quinn frowned at the cowering soldier in front of him. “I could shoot you dead with a clear conscience. Is that what you want?”

 

When the soldier began to snivel, a look of disgust briefly crossed Quinn’s face. He brusquely dismissed the soldier with a wave of his hand.

 

The soldier accidentally brushed by me in his haste to leave. I read the tension in his bowed shoulders and noted the man’s pale complexion. Despite my initial impression, I reluctantly admitted that, at the very least, the Lieutenant must wield enough influence to inspire fear among his subordinates.

 

But was it enough?

 

I stepped into the room. Quinn turned his attention to me, all traces of frustration wiped from his face. He bowed low.

 

I paused when I saw the hardness in his eyes. They shone at me with such intensity that my fingers instinctively gripped the hilt of my lightsaber in case he was fool enough to attack. When he merely waited for me to acknowledge him, I forced myself to relax.

 

“Lieutenant Malavai Quinn,” he introduced himself. “I am to be your liaison on Balmorra.”

 

The way his eyes met mine irritated me. Despite being in the presence of a Sith, the man was entirely too self-possessed. He radiated uncompromising strength in the face of my growing anger. If he dared to consider himself my equal, he would soon learn the painful truth.

 

“You say liaison,” I corrected him, my voice dripping with malice, “I say servant.”

 

Quinn hesitated. His expression remained bland, and yet his gaze never wavered. “Yes, I am in your charge…for as long as you are on this planet.”

 

The unmistakable truth inherent in his words left a sour taste in my mouth. He would be suitably obedient for as long as I was on his planet but I had no real power over him. Quinn was my master’s eyes and ears on Balmorra. He knew it. He knew I knew it. Baras had ways of making his displeasure felt, and I couldn’t afford to incur his wrath…yet.

 

But soon, I vowed to myself, I would see the vibrant blue of those eyes dulled to a lifeless gray. I struggled not to laugh at the thought of the Lieutenant licking the bottom of my boot in an attempt to appease my wrath.

 

When I didn’t immediately respond, Quinn continued, “I am to acquaint you with the climate here on Balmorra.”

 

Seemingly oblivious to my animosity, he began to brief me on the planet’s history. As he talked, his hands punctuated the air in concise movements. The heavy material of his military jacket stretched across his broad shoulders, hugging his masculine form like a second skin. I noted the faint shadow of stubble along his chiseled jaw and suddenly felt the urge to trace the contours of his face with my hands.

 

The emotion confused me.

 

My whore of a mother had taught me at an early age that sex was a commodity best sold to the highest bidder. A man’s passion was her leverage over weak-minded fools who saw my body as the key to unlock salvation for a mere handful of credits.

 

Even back then, I instinctively knew there was no such thing as eternal salvation. Peace was a lie. There was only the sinful pleasures felt by the strong pressing into the weak. But eventually, I learned that their power to dominate over and in and over again led the way to my eventual victory over fear. Once I learned to embrace the very emotions that controlled their baser instincts, I tasted the sweetness of freedom.

 

But this ache I suddenly felt in the pit of my stomach left me vulnerable, and I loathed him for it.

Edited February 6, 2012 by Arianwin
Spelling and grammar

it is!! ;P

 

oooh, great update. can't wait to see more quinn..squee. there should be more quinn stories all over the world. *nodnod*

 

I danced for him.

 

My body twisted to one side. Momentum propelled me high into the air. As I flung both arms outward, I heard the hum of my lightsabers slice through bone and flesh with ease. Blood splattered the metallic walls of the factory in large swaths of vibrant red.

 

I knew Quinn was tracking my every move from his command center. Something inside me thrilled at the thought of him watching me perform this intimate dance between hunter and hunted.

 

Each time I struck one of our enemies down, I imagined the hardness in Quinn’s eyes giving way to excitement. I moved faster, swung harder, leaped higher.

 

Man and machine melted away in the face of my battle lust, and I danced to the screams of the resistance force dying all around me. The rhythm of their faltering heartbeats guided my steps. Blood rained down on me like a summer’s storm—hot, wild, and free. My back arched. I clenched my thighs. Spasms of pleasure rocked through my center. I licked my lips, enjoying the taste of death against my skin.

 

The pit of my stomach quivered as an image of Quinn flashed across my mind. I remembered how his body had responded to my presence earlier today. When I described my victory at the Republic crater outpost, I was fascinated by the way his eyes seemed to darken. His nostrils had flared at the scent of blood and smoke clinging to my hair.

 

“It is my dream to see our enemy vanquished,” he’d confessed right before I left for the arms factory. “I’m excited by the prospect of you laying waste to the place.”

 

My world had righted itself when I heard the tremor in his voice. The Lieutenant was just a man, and like every other man in the galaxy, he could be manipulated for pleasure’s sake. I suddenly saw him in a new light, and pure lust shot straight through me. I had stepped closer to him, breathing him in like a predator scenting her prey. “So I excite you, do I?”

 

As I continued to storm my way through the arms factory, I remembered how Quinn had hastily retreated when he realized I’d marked him as mine with nothing more than words.

 

My laughter rang out through the building in harmony to the screams of the dying. I would enjoy teaching him the ways of the Sith.

I like it. The protagonist is a female Sith Warrior, yes?

Correct! Arianwin D'yer is a female Sith Warrior. Duel-wielding Marauder to be exact.

Very good. It was not hard to read at all. Thank you for not making it a huge block. I love the addition of Quinn.

 

Sinking into the pilot’s chair, I powered down the bright lights of the bridge with a wave of my hand. The screens in front of me dimmed until I found myself sitting in semi-darkness.

 

Fury maintained her course orbiting the moon below. To our left, Nar Shaddaa glowed an ethereal golden color against the backdrop of space. I closed my eyes. Even from where we were, I felt the energy of its inhabitants wailing at me. The smell of alleyways mingling with the bitter taste of pollution assaulted my senses.

 

It was easier to remember how much I loathed my life on that cursed piece of rock. I wrapped my hatred around me, burying myself into memories long forgotten until bits and pieces came back to me: biting a man’s hand after mine had been tied, selling beautifully-twisted shards of shrapnel to tourists, learning to wield my first blade. I went through every minute detail because I knew the emotions within these memories would be the only thing sustaining me tomorrow.

 

The cacophonous cries eventually receded. I opened my eyes when I felt the reassuring hum of Fury beneath me once more. Grasping the controls, I promised Fury we’d go for a quick spin.

 

It would just be the two of us tonight. The crew had long since retired. Despite having arrived at our destination hours ago, I’d ordered everyone to bunk onboard the ship. I needed time to prepare myself before we descended into the madness that was my birthplace.

 

Fury shuddered as we broke free from the gravitational pull of the moon. I could feel her straining against my hands, eager to stretch her wings.

 

“Easy,” I murmured.

 

It was Fury who first alerted me to his presence. Her steady hum lowered in pitch just before he stepped onto the bridge.

 

“Captain,” I greeted. The sound of his footsteps abruptly stopped when he heard my voice. I pictured him turning his head side to side trying to zero in on my location in the darkness. “You’re up late tonight.”

 

“I hope you don’t find my appearance here intrusive.” Quinn paused. “I was in my quarters when I felt the ship steer off course.”

 

“Did you?” I smiled down at the control in my hands. “I’ll have to take the blame for that one, Captain.”

 

“You’re flying blind?”

 

“Fury tells me what to do.” A lingering warmth enveloped me when he drew closer. Part of me wanted to continue what I’d started on Balmorra but Fury had lulled me into an odd frame of mind. Tomorrow suddenly seemed so far away.

 

A comfortable silence filled the air. Quinn stood beside me, hands clasped behind his back. His eyes scanned the darkened console. “She’s a beautiful ship.”

 

I felt Fury hum with approval. Strangely enough, I sensed Quinn felt it too. “I’ve been told you never forget your first one.”

 

“And if I have anything to do about it, you’ll never have to.” Quinn motioned towards the co-pilot’s chair. He waited for my permission before he slid in. “She’s been responding extremely well to my optimizations. I’m pleased to report that we’re operating at peak efficiency.”

 

I let him take over Fury’s controls while I half-listened to him rattle off a list of adjustments he’d already made to her system. I immediately felt the difference in the way she flew. Her restless movements eased as his hands moved over her. Her usual hum transformed into a low-throated whisper.

 

I remembered the way he knelt at my feet back on Balmorra. His eyes shone with zeal. His words, low and urgent, were filled with such fervor that I’d been lost for words.

 

“I cannot think of a more glorious and honorable way to make a difference in the galaxy than to serve you,” he’d said. “If given the chance, I know I will prove myself to you. I offer my military prowess and dedicate every ounce of my strength to your cause. I am ready and willing to serve.”

 

When I looked at him kneeling before me, something shifted inside. For the first time, I touched upon a state of being that nearly silenced the constant blood-curdling screams that plagued my existence. It lasted for the briefest of moments but it was enough to fill me with fear. Without hatred, I had no purpose. Without power, my life held no meaning.

 

But I learned long ago that fear led to power if I was only strong enough to endure its pain. Resting my chin on the palm of my hand, I watched him in silence. I needed to figure out this hold he had over me before it was too late. This connection between us could either propel me to greatness or tear my whole world asunder.

 

 

 

 

Lord Rathari’s men attacked.

 

Adrenaline flooded through my veins. In the blink of an eye, I read the way they moved: the slight tilt of their heads, the way they grasped their weapons, the subtle shift of their shoulders. My eyes met Quinn’s. He nodded once, telling me he understood. Gripping his blaster pistol, he aimed for the nearest soldier and fired.

 

I followed through with his attack, smashing the pommel of my lightsaber into the soldier’s skull. Bone crunched and splintered. He dropped to the ground, limbs still twitching.

 

Three more approached. I charged into their midst, deflecting their attacks with ease. A soldier lunged at me but I evaded his grasp. I danced through the air, ripping through skin and bone. The smell of burning flesh filled the air.

 

Quinn shouted a warning. I spun around in the nick of time to block Rathari’s downward blow. His lightsaber slammed against mine, and for a moment, we remained locked at an impasse. But my arm began to weaken. The strength of his Force overwhelmed me. I gritted my teeth, refusing to surrender.

 

From the corner of my eye, I saw Quinn struggle against Rathari’s agent. Dellocon had him in a headlock, choking him from behind. No matter how hard Quinn fought, the agent grimly held on.

 

Dellocon reached for his knife.

 

A calculated look flashed across Quinn’s face. He shook out his arm, revealing one last canister of carbonized spray strapped to his wrist. He twisted around, about to turn the tables on Dellocon, when he saw my precarious situation. Without hesitation, he aimed the spray at Rathari, leaving his own throat exposed to Dellocon’s rapidly descending knife.

 

Panic slammed into my gut. I pushed away from Rathari’s frozen form and soared through the air. My hands buried themselves deep into Dellocon’s side. The agent opened his mouth to scream but I denied him the pleasure. With a simple shrug of my shoulders, I sealed his mouth shut.

 

Seeing the dark bruises around my Captain’s throat set flame to a deep and horrible anger inside me. Color leeched from my vision. Darkness surrounded me. I could feel Dellocon’s life begin to fade but death was too good for him.

 

I chose instead to keep his consciousness intact as I slowly tore him in two. When his body finally grew limp, I tossed him aside.

 

I spun around to face the slowly thawing Rathari. Quinn took his position behind me. With his blaster ready at hand, he assured me with a grim smile that he’d personally see to it that there would be no escape for anyone who opposed me.

 

Readying my lightsaber, I counted down the seconds until the frozen shell encasing Rathari began to disintegrate. Blistering hatred crackled the air around me.

 

Rathari broke free with a roar. He rushed at me with hate in his eyes but I knew mine was greater now. Every parry, every lunge, every attack burned him. He was fast but I moved faster. My blows rained down on him like lightning.

 

He flinched, and I took advantage of the sudden opening. Reaching out with my hand, I wrapped tendrils of energy around his throat. I closed my fist and crushed his windpipe.

 

Quinn walked up beside me, holstering his pistol. He rubbed a hand over his throat and winced. “I must confess I didn’t think we’d escape from Rathari’s trap unscathed.”

 

“Yet you fought with me anyway.” I glanced over at Quinn, taking in his disheveled hair and torn jacket. I briefly wondered what my Captain would do if I offered to tear the rest of his uniform off…with my teeth.

 

Quinn seemed surprised I would question his dedication. “I pledged to serve you. If that means sacrificing my life to further the goals of the Empire, I will gladly give it.”

 

“You’re more useful to me alive then dead, Captain.”

 

Quinn bowed. “I will remember that, My Lord.”

 

I knew without a doubt that if given the choice again, he’d risked his life to save mine. Courage and conviction were all too rare these days, and my Captain had both in abundance. He would be a valuable asset in the coming war.

Oh my goddess. I do believe you're my new favorite person in the whole wide world.

 

Mooore, please? *puppydog eyes*

 

<3

Heh. Cocopants. You'll like the next several chapters. There's a lot of Quinn in 'em.

Heh. Cocopants. You'll like the next several chapters. There's a lot of Quinn in 'em.

 

wooo!

 

I love, love, LOVE Quinn.

 

Could you notice?

LOL. Just a little bit. But you'll have to fight me for him. Grrr!

LOL. Just a little bit. But you'll have to fight me for him. Grrr!

 

Bring it on.

 

In his lifeless eyes, I saw forgiveness.

 

Master Yonlach’s broken body lay before me. I’d done my best to break his will but the serene look on his face told me I’d failed.

 

I fell headfirst into a throbbing well of hatred. Before I killed him, he’d promised peace to replace the terrible rage inside me. He’d offered the gift of an empty existence free from torment, and for a moment, his Jedi mind trick stole the fire that burned inside me. I became no one. My husk of a body worthless, my will a sham, despite the power that coursed through these limbs.

 

Anguish welled up inside me. Pain, once so familiar, ripped me apart from the inside out as if my soul wore a shroud of a thousand needles. I clawed at his stiffening body, desperately looking for answers only he could give.

 

I stared into his unblinking gaze and imagined it was Nomen Karr’s padwan staring back. Did she breathe his last breath and feel a part of herself die when I ripped out his heart? Whatever he stole from me, I vowed to take from her. I would rip the peace out of her soul and tear out the forgiveness in her eyes.

 

A sharp pain in my shoulder brought me back to the here and now. Yonlach was dead. Alderaan was next. My plan to lull Baras into a false sense of security was well underway. Yonlach’s lies meant nothing to me anymore.

 

Clutching my injured arm to my side, I stumbled to my feet. A sense of urgency gripped me when I saw Quinn’s unconscious form. There were no obvious physical injuries. Whatever the Jedi had done, he’d done it to Quinn’s mind.

 

I bent over Quinn, blanketing him with my energy. The pain came hard and fast but I clamped my lips together, refusing to scream. The bones in my arm realigned themselves. Muscle and sinew stitched back together.

 

My awareness inspected every part of his body, looking for traces of Jedi filth. My leg burned when I absorbed an ugly gash on Quinn’s thigh. My own rib cracked when I cemented his back together.

 

In the recesses of Quinn’s mind, I caught a whiff of an unfamiliar stench. I followed its trail until I bumped up against a dark presence. It oozed with animosity, leaving no doubt in my mind that this was Yonlach’s work. I tentatively pushed against it.

 

Intense pain plunged its fingers into me. I screamed and threw myself back into my own body. Shivering, I wrapped my arms around my torso and grimly stared at Quinn. Yonlach might be dead but the monster he’d left behind remained alive.

 

The battle lines were drawn. The prize lay before me. Blind hatred suffused my being at the thought of admitting defeat. Despite the alarm bells clamoring in my head, I leaned forward once again.

 

I ripped open Quinn’s shirt and placed my hand on his chest. The feeling of his heart beating against my palm was like a balm to my fear. I could do anything, be anything, as long as I had Quinn by my side.

 

With a shout, I surged back into his mind. Pain ripped through me, shredding me into unrecognizable chunks of agony. I tore into Yonlach’s minion but my hands burned each time I struck it.

 

The skin along my arms blistered. My fingernails cracked and peeled but I refused to stop. The thought of leaving Quinn alone in this eternal sea of darkness drove me crazy so I gave myself over to the pain. With one last cry, I tore myself into a hundred different pieces because it was easier than letting him go.

 

The monster disappeared.

 

Quinn jerked awake. He sat up abruptly, grasping for breath. It took a few moments before he remembered where he was. He looked at me, and his eyes softened to a pale blue. I saw gratitude and embarrassment flit across them.

 

He gently touched my bloodied hands. “My Lord, I’m sorry I was of no use to you. I did not anticipate the Jedi’s incapacitating attack.”

 

With alarm, I realized my touch had burned an image of my handprint onto his chest. The mark puckered and smoked when I pulled away.

 

Quinn didn’t flinch. He pulled out a small vial of green-colored ointment from the med kit strapped to his belt. Reaching for my hands, he began to apply the cooling salve over my wounds.

 

“I’m fine,” I protested. “You need to heal yourself.”

 

He cleared his throat. “Allow me to perform my duty. I’m just thankful my support proved to be unnecessary.”

 

Thanks to the salve, my wounds rapidly healed but he showed no signs of stopping, his thumbs rubbing my hands in large lazy circles. I shifted uneasily but I kept my mouth shut. It felt…good.

 

The universe receded until there was only him and the feeling of his hands on mine. A curious stillness seeped into my soul.

squeee.

 

It's just getting better and better here. ;D

 

I adjusted the scrap of silk covering my eyes. The world around me disappeared.

 

A gust of wind blew through the courtyard, flowing over and around me like a lover's caress. The smell of fresh blood lingered in the air. Our troops were still cleaning up the destruction I'd left behind at House Organa.

 

Guards chattered off to one side. The familiar roar of engines told me a shipment of weapons would be arriving soon. When the wind blew past an abandoned droid, its hollow body sung a low dirge.

 

Something had happened to me on Tatooine. The constant wailing in my head still kept me up at night but the tortured aching had disappeared. I'd discovered I could dial down the volume of my Force sensitivity until the glare of the galaxy's vibrations lost its razor-sharp edge.

 

Like a child taking her first steps, my awareness slowly expanded until I was seeing the world's essence for the first time. Edges wavered. Movements blurred. A leaf dropped to the ground, leaving behind rippling currents in the air.

 

It was with this new way of seeing that I finally saw the dormant power lying within Quinn. The currents that preceded him pulsed with a beat that resonated with something inside me. My Captain moved with purpose, his long stride eating up the distance between us. When he turned the corner, it was like figuring out the answer to a riddle plaguing me for years.

 

In a world filled with faded hues, vibrant colors swirled around his form. Their brilliance undiminished by bright waves of energy emanating from him. His essence composed of hard lines and sharp angles that somehow remained remarkably clear in a sea of fog.

 

I knew the exact moment he saw me. The energy around him froze, and dark purples and blues began to churn beneath his surface. He who prided himself on absolute control hid a maelstrom of conflicted emotions from the rest of the world. Seeing him in this new light excited me, and I vowed he would soon surrender to those emotions.

 

I picked up the training swords I'd brought with me. Their padded lengths felt dull in my hands. Heavy. Lifeless.

 

"Quinn!" My voice rang through the courtyard. "Attack me."

 

He looked at me with confusion.

 

"Captain Malavai Quinn," I snapped. "Your superior officer orders you to attac—"

 

He fired his blaster.

 

I didn't have time to think. My body reacted purely on instinct. I deflected his attack, forgetting that I was holding wooden swords instead of lightsabers. Both swords shattered. Wood chips exploded into the air. By the time I realized my mistake, there was nothing I could do but brace myself for the crippling blow.

 

Knowing Quinn, I expected nothing less than for him to shoot with intent to kill. The burst of energy from his blaster aimed straight for my heart.

 

In the face of death, the world flickered on and off. The film that covered my eyes burned away, and I saw thousands upon thousands of energy strands swirling around me. They tore through me, burrowed inside, pulled me apart. My own edges began to blur until I flickered along with the world. My body disappeared, the tangible bits and parts of me merging with each energy strand swimming in the air

 

Instinctively, I flowed around the rapidly approaching beam of energy so its path burned a trail through my chest without harm. My mind froze when I realized what I'd just done. The thrill of harnessing such raw power breathed life into my flesh and bones. My awareness snapped back into my body, and I re-coalesced several feet away from where I originally stood.

 

"Is that the best you can do?" I laughed. Stalking towards Quinn, I challenged him with a growl. "Captain, how dare you underestimate me."

 

His face tightened. In one smooth motion, he holstered his gun and waited for me to approach. I could hear his heart beating with adrenaline. The faintest quiver in his energy spoke of dread anticipation for the fight to come.

 

Something spark to life within him. He lunged at me, knife in hand.

 

I scoffed. He'd have to do better than that. My arm snaked around his wrist and pulled him past me. A slight twist spun him around. His own momentum caused him to stumble.

 

"How will you defeat the Empire's enemies if you can't even beat me?" I taunted.

 

He caught his balance and spun around to face me. His eyes blazed a brilliant blue. The air around him began to bleed red.

 

I waited for him to try again.

 

Quinn stabbed downward with his knife. Better. I could feel the strength in him surge against me. But not good enough. My forearm struck the crook of his elbow, and I stepped into his embrace. We stood face to face, the point of his knife inches from my eye.

 

My lips brushed against his ear, and I breathed him in. He was sweat mingled with metallic fire and ash across a devastated landscape. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end when his energy called to me. Heat pooled at the pit of my stomach.

 

Quinn pulled me towards him, slamming his lips against mine. My energy bucked like a wild thing. I bit him hard enough to draw blood but he refused to release me, the heat of his body demanding that I yield to him.

 

Yes, oh yes.

 

All coherent thought flew out of my head when he nudged my legs apart with his thigh. He gripped my wrists with one hand, restraining them against my back. The feel of him between my legs drove me crazy.

 

Without warning, I found myself lying on the ground. His legs pinned me down. His knife pressed against my throat.

 

"I think I found your weakness." He chuckled. Threading his fingers through my blindfold, he ripped it away.

 

"I'm not convinced," I breathed. His eyes shone with a darkness that hadn't been there before. It mesmerized me. "We should explore your theory further just to make sure."

 

Propping himself up on one elbow, he looked down at me. The expression on his face grew serious. "Any personal involvement between us could cloud judgement and compromise campaigns."

 

"I like taking risks," I purred. Arching my back, I rubbed my body against his.

 

I allowed my energy to fuse with his until he could feel me pulsate around his length. His eyes grew darker. His jaw clenched. But before I could take advantage of the way his body responded so readily to mine, my personal holocommunicator buzzed.

 

We broke apart. The shuttered expression on Quinn's face told me our discussion was over…for now.

Edited March 23, 2012 by Arianwin

I like it, good work

 

Quinn staggered to his feet, knocking over a half-empty bottle of Corellian whisky. It rolled towards me. The rhythmic clanking of glass against metal stopped when I nudged it with my foot.

 

"Enjoying your night off, Captain?" I wondered how long Quinn had been sitting in the dark by himself. Judging by the distinct smell of whisky lingering throughout the bridge, he'd been at it for a while.

 

"Forgive me for the intrusion, my Lord." Despite his inebriated state, Quinn remained remarkably composed. He carefully pronounced each syllable with extreme precision to keep from slurring his words. "I didn't expect to see you on board tonight."

 

"Neither did I."

 

An awkward silence descended. My insides twitched.

 

Baras had granted us leave to celebrate our most recent victory against Nomen Karr. When I argued against taking time away from fighting our enemies, he'd transferred an obscene amount of credits into my account and insisted I take the time to upgrade Fury with the best the Empire had to offer.

 

I'd finally agreed to remain docked at the Imperial Fleet for several days. At the very least, the time off had given me the opportunity to introduce Jaessa to one of life's sweetest pleasures: torturing Republic prisoners for vital military secrets. I'd been pleased to see how fast she picked up the finer points of interrogation. No doubt she was now burning her way through each prison cell with wild abandon. Woe betide to any man, woman, or alien standing in the way of my Apprentice's growing hunger.

 

I'd intended to spend the night alone on board Fury. The bustling crowds had left me yearning for solitude, and my hands ached to test out Fury's new upgrades. I thought I had the ship to myself. After all, Vette wouldn't be back for another three days, and Quinn had supposedly taken a shuttle to meet up with an old military friend.

 

Instead, my Captain now stood somewhat unsteadily in front of me. I inspected him from head to toe. "Is everything alright, Captain?"

 

He flinched. A spark of anger leaped into his eyes. "Permission to speak freely."

 

"Granted."

 

"I wish to be reassigned."

 

Quinn's words struck me hard. I clenched my fist, forcing myself to remain still. "And what of your promise to serve me? Do your vows mean so little to you, Captain?"

 

"No. I—" He rubbed a hand over his face. "My Lord, I am compromised."

 

I suddenly wanted to choke him until he fell to his knees. "Compromised by whom?"

 

"By you!" Quinn snarled. Breathing heavily, he began to pace back and forth. "As a military man, I value discipline, the chain of command, and uncompromising dedication to serving the Empire's interest but you make my path less clear."

 

"We share the same desire to make the most profound impact possible for the Empire. I do not see the problem."

 

He narrowed the gap between us. Putting his face right up against mine, he gripped my arms hard enough to hurt. "Thoughts of you have begun to distract me. I find myself fighting for you instead of the Empire."

 

I was close enough to smell the whiskey on his breath but the feverish panic in his eyes distracted me more. My Captain, if nothing else, was a profoundly reliable man. It disturbed me to see him so unhinged. Reaching out a hand to wipe the sweat from his brow, I leaned in to steady him. "You've forgotten the reason why you fight this war."

 

"Precisely, my Lord."

 

If only Quinn understood the way to rise above this weakness was to embrace the emotions he hated to feel. My Captain needed to remember the thrill of striking fear into the heart of his enemies. He needed to remember the joy of his first kill.

 

I wordlessly slid into the pilot's chair. Fury shuddered to life, her engines roaring as pistons fired and fuel pumped through her metallic veins. Within moments, we were airborne.

 

Once away from the endless stream of Imperial traffic, I set Fury's engines to neutral. She hiccuped in protest but eventually subsided into a drowsy hum.

 

I offered Quinn my hand. "Do you trust me?"

 

Despite the uncertainty in his eyes, he took my hand. His grip was strong; the palm of his hand rough and warm against mine.

 

I led him through Fury, stopping only when we reached the airlock. My hand tightened around his. "Whatever you do," I warned. "Don't let go."

 

Quinn paled when he saw me initiate the decompression sequence.

 

"Hold on," I yelled over the deafening sound of air being sucked into space.

 

I pulled Quinn into my embrace. His arms wrapped around me, and he buried his face into my hair. Even in the middle of chaos, his strength never wavered. The noise in my head faded until the only thing I felt was him.

 

The feel of his heart beating in time with mine touched something deep inside me. How odd to be so moved by such a simple thing.

 

I relaxed against him and tapped into the Force, calling forth a shimmering blue bubble. I pulled at it with my will until it stretched large enough to surround us both. When it snapped into place, it sealed enough air in with us to last a while.

 

The hatch doors hissed open.

 

Silence. There was only silence as the noise of the living fell away. Quinn peered out into the wide expanse of space in awe. The expression on his face mesmerized me, and I suddenly realized I would do anything, be anything, to keep him safe.

 

This man was mine, and I was his. For as long as we both lived, I would kiss death a thousand times to keep him by my side. I trembled at the knowledge that he held so much power over me. It felt wrong yet so terribly right that I dared not make a sound for fear of losing my mind.

 

Instead, I tugged his hand and motioned for him to follow. The gravity belt around my waist kept my feet firmly planted against Fury even as we climbed our way onto her hull.

 

"You want to know what we fight for?" I asked once we made it safely to the top. My voice sounded muffled within the confines of the bubble.

 

Quinn looked to where I pointed. The might of the Empire lay before us, the Imperial Fleet glowing like a beacon of light. It's sheer size and multi-layered functional design was a testament to Imperial strength and ingenuity.

 

"We fight to win."

 

"No matter the cost."

 

I watched as emotions flickered over his face. They weren't the ones I expected. Instead, I saw pain, regret, acceptance. Before I could question him further, he turned towards me with a renewed look of conviction in his eyes.

 

"This is the greatest gift anyone has ever given me, my Lord." He bowed low. "You honor me."

 

"If you still wish to be reassi—"

 

He kissed me softly as if he cherished me. "You've set my mind at ease. I now know my place in this world."

 

"Your place is with me."

 

"Always."

 

With that single word, I found myself faced with a choice. Should I choose to throw myself over the rocky precipice of ambition, all the power in the world would soon be within my grasp, and the universe would one day tremble at my feet. But tonight, sheltered in my Captain's arms, I found myself turning away from the tenets I'd followed my entire life.

 

We Sith deal in absolutes. In a world filled with black and white, we burn in the moment, cater to our own selfish desires, and sacrifice the now for the promise of power in the future.

 

But I knew this lingering call of the void would lead me to damnation. For if I must burn, then let me burn for him. If I must leap, then let it be into his arms. If I must become unborn, then let my conviction be grounded in the depth and breadth of this single kiss.

 

I pulled his head towards me, craving the touch of his lips against mine. I yearned to taste him, to feel his tongue dance over my skin. I needed him to mark me the way my master had done.

 

[Note from the author: Things get a little steamy for the rest of this chapter. If you want to keep going, I've posted the full version here.]

 

Betrayal. It turns us into fools. Sharper than a knife, stronger than the Force, betrayal rips you apart from the inside out. Your secrets lie exposed like eviscerated flesh for all the world to see. But without betrayal, we are nothing. This beautiful agony slashes at your veins until you bleed out the sins of your mortal soul. In the ashes of your death, you become reborn.

 

On the day I died, the first betrayal destroyed my ship. I'd felt Fury's angry howl before an immense explosion ripped her apart. She who flew with me to the farthest reaches of the galaxy and showed me the meaning of true freedom died that day.

 

The second betrayal came at the hand of my master's apprentice. Lying in the smoldering rubble that once was my ship, my hands fumbled to defend myself. My weakness infuriated me, drowned me in self-loathing. As Draagh's saber descended, I looked into his eyes and saw death.

 

Betrayal. It escapes you when you look for it but blindsides you when you turn away. In the place where shame and grace collide, I remembered the way my Captain's hands had gripped my thighs, the way his lips had claimed my body for his own. Like a weak-willed acolyte, I'd allowed him to touch the deepest part of me.

 

My Captain had planted the bomb that destroyed my ship. He'd given my enemies the coordinates to find me. His misplaced sense of honor had chosen Baras, and in so doing, had presented Draagh with the perfect opportunity to kill both of us in one fell swoop.

 

Everything in me cried out for vengeance. Nothing but my Captain's pain would set me free.

 

And yet.

 

And yet.

 

No matter how I tried, my traitorous heart refused to move. Even as hands pulled me away, I continued to claw at Quinn's unconscious form. I felt his mind slip away, heard his heart stop beating. Panic shackled the Force within, and my hate deserted me.

 

This third and final betrayal extinguished my will to live. It left me with nothing, and I sank into Death's waiting embrace.

 

Pain greeted me like an old friend. She breathed against my skin and licked away my tears. I swam through darkness, floating in a sea of agony. Part of me struggled against her seductive pull. Like a siren's song, her wails lulled me into a stupor.

 

No! I screamed at her, fought against her. Despite the pounding in my head, I challenged her to do her worst. Vengeance infused my weakened limbs with renewed strength.

 

I opened my eyes. The room hadn't changed but this cycle felt different. The chains that bound my wrists had been hooked onto a beam along the ceiling. I hung suspended in the air. Countless wounds had been reopened along my naked body, and blood steadily dripped down into the metallic tub below.

 

The lightwhip crackled in the air. Its hissing sound served as my only warning before pain lunged at me with claws extended. My body jerked. I tasted blood. The skin along my back already hung in strips of smoking flesh but still the lashing continued.

 

"Enough," Servant One said.

 

I bared my teeth at the unwelcome interruption. The Emperor's Hands had chosen to keep me alive after they'd killed Draagh. For four months, I had been beaten, drowned, and whipped without fail. Nothing in my body had been left untouched: bones broken, fingernails ripped, kneecaps twisted.

 

Their pathetic attempts to break my will left my body a bloodied mess but I simply endured. Pain was everything to a Sith. Each lash of the whip purged away the weakness of this flesh, and I wanted more.

 

The sharper the pain, the more vivid the memories of the lives I'd taken. I relieved their screams, heard their cries for mercy, experienced the precise moment when death finally came. Their ecstasy fluttered beneath my hands, and I saw their reverence for life in the whiteness of their eyes.

 

A weak laughter emerged from my throat. Nothing could break me as long as I had hate to sustain me. Everything the Emperor's Hands did to me, I vowed to do to Baras. Hell hath no fury like a Sith scorned, and so I watched and waited for a chance to escape.

 

My mind flickered to the presence growing inside my belly. No matter the cost, I would live to teach my daughter the ways of the Sith. Even now, I whispered to her the ancient Code, shared with her the hatred I'd learned throughout the years, and focused my Force to give her the life she needed to survive.

 

My daughter gave me a strength of purpose I had never known before. Without question, I would lay down my life to protect this child of mine, and I held this new-found emotion close to my heart.

 

"The Wrath is ready for ascension," Servant Two murmured.

 

I spat in his face. Whatever the Emperor wanted, I refused to be a part of it. Aside from Baras' death, I had only one calling left, and that was to see my daughter live.

 

Four men emerged from the shadows. They unchained my wrists and gently lowered me into the tub until I was half submerged in blood. Three of them held my body down. The fourth gripped my head tightly in his hands.

 

Servant One bent over me. He anointed my brow with a clear odorless liquid. "You are the last to survive the Emperior's Trial. Your will is strong but you have lost your way."

 

"The Wrath's heart is torn," Servant Two murmured.

 

"Pledge your allegiance to the Emperor," Servant One continued, "become His Wrath, and wield untold power over your enemies."

 

"Pain shall set the Emperor's Wrath free."

 

I heard the hiss of a match, smelled the acrid scent of smoke. Without warning, tears began to stream down my face. I knew what I had to become in order for my daughter to live through this day. The Emperor would demand all of me; there could be nothing left. I howled like an enraged beast at the sudden knowledge that my hunger for power would one day destroy my own daughter.

 

"Choose," Servant One commanded.

 

"The Wrath will ascend." Servant Two smiled. His eyes flickered down to my belly. "The Wrath's legacy will be complete."

 

My eyes met his, and an unspoken understanding passed between us. Become the Emperor's Wrath, and the Hand will protect my daughter. My path was suddenly clear.

 

"So be it."

 

My body bursted into flames. Searing pain tore me into chunks of agony as my skin blistered and burned. I thrashed against the hands that held me down. A high-pitched shriek escaped my lips.

 

Driven mad by the excruciating torment, my mind exploded outwards. Force rippled through the room, destroying everything it touched. I felt the four men around me die, and I drank in their deaths as if their souls could give me the clarity to rise above this dying body. Blistering energy pulsed in time to my thundering heartbeat. The fire around me burned a white-hot hue.

 

And I began to See.

 

Through the haze of pain, I tapped into the current of energy that ran through all living things. This web reverberated with perfect strength and perfect power. It freed me from the clutches of this mortal coil, and I discovered I could straddle the edges of galaxies and perceive the darkest secrets of man. Distance and time meant nothing to me. I breathed in the universe, and it breathed with me. My chains shattered, and the flames around me died.

 

I hummed with the pain of a thousand deaths writhing beneath my oozing flesh. No one would ever stand in my way again. Not Baras, not the Emperor, not even my unborn daughter could compare with this state of savage perfection that claimed my soul.

 

"Rise," Servant One commanded. "You have one more task to fulfill before the Emperor will accept you as his Wrath."

 

"The journey is incomplete," Servant Two murmured.

 

I frowned. "I will kill Baras."

 

Servant One shook his head. "The Emperor will unleash you against your former master soon."

 

"Then wha—"

 

"Captain Malavai Quinn is still alive."

 

"The Wrath's heart still lives," Servant Two intoned.

 

An old muscle twitched inside me as memories of my Captain resurfaced: the warmth of his hand against my cheek, his unyielding strength against the enemies of the Empire, the heat of him pulsing inside me. It felt like a lifetime ago.

 

"But he is not as he once was," Servant One continued, "just as you are not as you once were."

 

"The Wrath's heart is broken."

 

"But he's alive." My lips tightened. Quinn was my only weakness. The Code demanded retribution, and it was my right as Sith to wield the blade that would end his life.