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06.04.2013 , 01:27 AM | #251
Cademimu. Story mode. Story mode.

Typically-oblivious leveling Tank who pays zero attention to what's attacking me (healer) and tunnel-visions exactly 1 mob, sometimes stopping to slowly keyboard turn and do nothing for 5 seconds before going back to his tunneled mob. I spend every pull mostly healing myself against 3-4 mobs. Whatever, it's leveling FPs, I'm used to this.

Both DPS are doing really low damage, and the Gunslinger is not very bright. In the pull with 2 Champion droids, the Gunslinger inexplicably breaks CC and tries to solo one of the Champion droids while the Tank & other DPS both attack the un-CC'd one. I mean, he's a Gunslinger... he could just re-CC it and switch to the tanked droid, right? Instead he sits there performing a DPS rotation on it, getting torn to pieces and sucking up all my healing resources.

He starts running around in circles, randomly entering Cover and leaving it, but doesn't stop shooting the droid with a CC mark on it. Eventually I just stop healing him (I can't afford it any more) and around 10% Health he gets the clue and Slices the droid (after beating it to 60% health over about 2 minutes).

Anyway I carry them through pull after pull of heal-tanking and so far no one has died. Then we get to Xander / EN-4C.

Try #1:
  • Guardian DPS is immediately Carbonized as soon as the robot starts chasing him; he doesn't even try to escape.
  • Next, robot switches to the Gunslinger. He sits there shooting the boss and is Carbonized.
  • Finally, the robot switches to the tank. Tank sits there and gets Carbonized.
  • I hustle out and reset the fight.

Try #2:
  • I explain tactics (again).
  • Tank gets picked by robot. Tank sits there, and is immediately carbonized.
  • Guardian DPS gets picked next. Keeps whacking boss; is immediately carbonized.
  • Gunslinger DPS stands in gray spots (despite being told not to stand near the shuttles) and gets insta-Cubed.
  • I hustle out and reset the fight.

The Gunslinger takes this opportunity to angrily complain that I am a "bad healer" and I'm "not even trying to heal him". I try to explain that healing carbonized people is a hopeless activity when I need those resources to keep the tank alive, and that he needs to not get caught by the robot or stand near the shuttles if he wants to live. The Gunslinger declares I am a "stupid noob".

Try #3
  • I once again explain the tactics for this fight, pointing out the gray spots near the shuttles and the red warning text indicating you need to run from the robot.
  • Within 10 seconds of the fight beginning, the Gunslinger has gotten himself carbonized.
  • The tank then runs into an orange circle, and is carbonized.
  • The Guardian DPS accidentally falls off the edge of the platform while doing weird spinning jumps to try to escape the robot.
  • I hustle out and reset the fight.

The tank is now angrily yelling at the DPS for being "bad" and "ruining the fight for us". He initiates a votekick at the Guardian DPS, which passes despite me trying to explain that he's not really to blame.

Try #4:
  • I attempt to explain why votekicking the Guardian DPS was both unfair and not going to solve anything.
  • While I'm typing, the Gunslinger runs up and fires a Charged Burst at Xander.
  • The Tank immediately turns and runs out of the room.
  • The Gunslinger (standing by the shuttle, again) is simultaneously caught in an orange circle, shot mercilessly by Xander, and carbonized.
  • I watch in disbelief while he serenades party chat with a long, expletive-filled dissertation about why I am the worst healer ever.
  • Gunslinger dies and the fight resets.

The tank calls the Gunslinger a colorful variety of synonyms for "idiot" in broken, typo-filled sentences. Then the Tank adds, with amazing optimism, "ok, I think we got it this time" and Force Leaps onto Xander before I can even start rezzing the Gunslinger.

I /wave and drop group. Just before I click Exit Area, I watch the Tank get carbonized. Again.