I also solved the problem. I used SWTOR Unleashed 3.0 to create a virtual RAM and it started patching, but i'm not sure if that was the solution. It could also be the fact that i restarted the launcher again and again until it worked.
Thanks for the response anyway.
normally advice is to disable unleashed... so maybe best to keep this of when updating in future unless you find it only works under certain conditions (which include unleashed being on)