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Morgani's Avatar

07.26.2012 , 01:57 PM | #6
Really enjoyed this. Fem Smug seems so confident and self assured it's refreshing to see her second guess, come around, fall back, and pick herself up. I loved the magnet allusion, being constantly drawn and repelled by him. Great imagery, and a protagonist that's stunningly easy to relate to.

I know writers don't always like to hear it pointed out, but I honestly think if's 'power couplings' and Pazaak is the version of Sabaac (its a precursor to the game played that won the Falcon) played in the Old Republic. Something maybe to consider for more authenticity.

But I loved it. You should wander over to Elliotcat's Weekly Fic challenge and dazzle us weekly some short fics!
Be to her Virtues
very Kind.
Be to her Faults
a little Blind.