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07.20.2012 , 07:29 AM | #42
(Two notes: One, yes, I'm skipping from Wednesday to Friday, because when supervisor inspiration strikes sometimes you can't wait. And two, I reserve the right to fail to be inspired by any given suggestion, but if they stir up fun thought processes you can be sure I'll run with 'em )

On FRIDAYS, FCD is staffed by KHEM VAL and SCORPIO.

SCORPIO: Now, children. It is time for hide and seek. This is a matter of the utmost importance if you wish to survive long enough to come into your own as fighters. Yuun, you will be our hunter.
BABY AKAAVI: There is no honor in that. It isn't fair at all.
SCORPIO: Neither is life. Adapt.
KHEM VAL: As children are found, they will join the hunt. The last child to be found will win the comfort of knowing that in case of emergency, he or she will be the last to die.
SCORPIO: That child will also be awarded a cookie.
SCORPIO: An immediate motivation will prompt the children to try harder. Death is abstract. Cookies are concrete.
The children scatter to hide. BABY YUUN makes a series of bizarre noises that might be construed as counting. After he reaches a long creak and a series of descending clicks, he uncovers his eyes and starts looking around. Within seconds he makes a beeline for the enormous rulebook in the corner. BABY ELARA is hiding behind it.
BABY ELARA: ...oh.
BABY YUUN: You always hide there.
BABY ELARA: One of these days the rulebook will actually protect me.
BABY YUUN turns to face BABY BROONMARK, who is sitting in the middle of the playroom floor, his ludicrously outsize fur puffing all around him.
BABY YUUN: You have also been found.
BABY YUUN: Traditionally one hides, for hide and seek. And now you must come seek with us.
BABY BROONMARK, not moving: Blllorp.
BABY ELARA: It's the rules, Broonmark.
BABY ELARA: Or you can stay there.
BABY YUUN and BABY ELARA walk slowly around the room, looking.
BABY YUUN: The signs are confused. The smell of superiority is strong on Risha, but it crosses and crisscrosses with similar smells in this place.
BABY ELARA: We could just put a pile of credits out in the open and wait for her to come running.
A hopeful gasp is heard from the toy bin.
BABY YUUN: You have been found, Risha.
BABY RISHA emerges from under the pile of toys, pushing past M1-4X and making a face.
BABY ELARA: Who does that leave us?
BABY YUUN: Talos, for one.
BABY RISHA: I bet Talos is hiding in Broonmark's fur again. He always hides in Broonmark's fur.
BABY TALOS, muffled: It's warm. But nobody's hiding in here. Nope. Not me.
BABY RISHA, giggling: I think two-thirds of Broonmark's weight is fur.
KHEM VAL: He will grow into the fur. In time he may grow to be a powerful and minimally allergenic warrior, like those I contended with on the battlefields of Yn and Chabosh.
BABY YUUN: You have been found, Talos. Come with us.
The children continue.
BABY YUUN: We hear no signs in the air.
BABY TALOS, hopefully: Maybe the scary Zabrak ran away forever?
BABY AKAAVI drops from the ceiling and starts efficiently beating the seekers, knocking BABY YUUN to the ground in a matter of seconds, simultaneously pulling BABY RISHA's and BABY ELARA's hair, and staring at BABY TALOS until he falls over in terror.
KHEM VAL: Akaavi. This is hide and seek, not hide and ambush.
BABY AKAAVI: There is a time to hide, and a time to fight. This is the time to fight.
BABY AKAAVI, keeping her stare firmly on KHEM VAL, kicks backward to kneecap a charging BABY BROONMARK. She thrusts an elbow back to jab him as he falls, then steps aside to let him crash to the ground.
BABY AKAAVI: If there are others to compete, let them come. The petty social niceties of hide and seek will not protect them.
KHEM VAL: I think she wins.
SCORPIO: This one will go far.
SCORPIO hands BABY AKAAVI a large cookie.
BABY AKAAVI: This cookie will bring honor to my clan.
KHEM VAL: No, it won't. It's a cookie.
SCORPIO: You understand very little of the sentient psyche, Khem.
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